Hey, our names are Steph and Jess.
Were two disfunctional best friends
We are interested in talking with others and helping with their problems considering we've been through a lot. We're new to this but feel free to ask us anything and we'll give you the best advice possible. We specialize in stress, friend problems, boy confusions, and we will talk about anything else you like also like sex concerns drugs and alcohol, pretty much everything!
E-mail: sjadvice36@yahoo.com
Gender: Female
Location: new york
Age: 16
Member Since: May 17, 2007
Answers: 23
Last Update: October 5, 2007
Visitors: 3113
Main Categories:
Love Life
Friendship
Work/School Relationships
View All
|
| |
|
i was wondering what people thought about student and teacher in a relationship. what do you think about it? (link)
| |
how old are you and how old is the teacher?
|
15/f
There's this guy and I've known him for 2 years now; he's in 3/6 of my classes.
I haven't really ever talked to him, but I want to be friendly with him, and I don't know how.
I mean, would it be weird if I suddenly start talking to him?
He sits right across from me (we're facing each other, lol) in one class, and right behind me in another.
So how should I go about this?
Thanks. :) (link)
|
Well your really lucky he sits near you and since he does its really easy one day when theres a chance make a comment about something that can easily start up any kind of conversation even if its a tiny one.. that way he realizes who you are more and realizes that you are trying.. then trust me as the school year goes on you will keep on making more small talk and turn into real talk and i bet you will both be friends really soon.. maybe even more ;]....also look really happy around him like smile and stuff.. when a guy sees a girl is like friendly and stuff they notice that theyre cool and stuff and will want to be your friend on your own.. trust me your at the age when making friends is what you do...
if you have any more questions feel free to email me!!
|
|
Hi. I'm a 14-year old female.I have this friend that I like a lot as a friend but I also have a crush on him as well. The thing is, I can't be in a situation where the two of us could be together, because of our reputations, and it's against my religious beliefs. There's a large group of girls at my school that hates the people I am friends with, as well as myself; what's important about that is that if this guy and I got together, they would never leave me alone about it for as long as I live! I initially wouldn't care, but I just don't want to put up with them. It's really confusing because I want to be just friends with him anyway, but I also have a major crush on him. I want to be able to stop liking him that way but still be just friends. Is there anything I can do so this could happen? Thanks. (link)
|
so in your case you really cant like get with him right??? and theres no options the only option is to get over him??? well yeah i feel your pain because i dont understand how you can just keep turning your own crushes down because of the fact you cant date him but thats fine though i understand it also..
Yeah getting over guys is the hardest thing, just hang out with your friends alot and do fun stuff things you dont normally do and it will help you get him off your mind its going to take a while believe me and dont talk to him during the time you are trying to get over him and then when you finaally feel your over him gradually talk to him again and just as friends this time.. also try to talk to other guys cause i meen not so that you start liking other ones.. but if you talk to more guys it will help get over one becuase they will all be your friends and you cant like them all so then youll be able to be around him as a friend just like the other guys. I had a situation that i liked a guy for the longest time and we were on and off for a while and i eventually got over him sometimes when his name comes up i dont even think at all like its just like any other guy nothing special .. trust me youll get over him dont worry just ask your friends to help you.. they always do.
|
This will be long and I apologize, but it's a long story. I have good grammar, I promise. :] (and yes, this is about a guy)
Me = 18/f
Him = 17/m
Ok, we'll start 2 years ago where it all began. His name is Drew and I forget how I met him hahah. But we had lunch together and we slowly started liking each other. We would feed each other french fries and flirt a lot and everyone kept saying "Why don't you guys just go out?" and we'd just look at each other and laugh. We had an AIM conversation in which we basically told each other we liked each other and he asked me to the Snowball. As it turned out, they cancelled it. :[ And nothing else really happened that year, except the same old flirting. At this point, he usually wore a black t-shirt and jeans and had a longer haircut. Not a lot-long, it was above his shoulders and kinda wavy.
Now we get into last year. I hadn't talked to him all summer and when I came back to school, I was surprised to find that he cut his hair short and kinda spiky and dressed completely preppy. I didn't talk to him much during the first couple of months. Then Homecoming was coming around and I know guys are supposed to ask girls, but I ended up asking him, because we sort of starting talking again (as in saying "hey" in the hallway and stuff). But he already had a date. Obviously, I was a bit crushed and ended up just going w/ 4 of my friends. I got to talk to him once during the dance and got a cute pic of him, but then I left to go hang out w/ my friends. We went out in the courtyard to hang out and eat popcorn and I started crying and saying how much I wanted him. Pathetic, I know, but it was how I honestly felt. After that, we hardly talked much the rest of the year. He was hanging out w/ a different group of friends, but we still had the occasional "hey" in the hallway.
Now the most recent and confusing paragraph hahah. This is this school year. Again, we didn't talk much during the first few months. At the time, I had a boyfriend of 4 months, but we broke up because he told me he was bi, and I wasn't comfy w/ that, if you know what I mean. I'm not a homophobe if that's what you're thinking, it was just weird dating him after that. So almost as soon as I broke up w/ him, I went out w/ another guy, but it didn't last long. I also requested to be Drew's friend on myspace, but we never commented on each other's profiles or anything. Then, out of the blue, he sent me a comment saying "This might sound weird, but I actually kind of miss you". Cute, rite? So we started commenting back and forth and he gave me his number and told me to call him. I did, and for not talking in practically forever, it wasn't awkward at all. He even started talking about the past and how he wondered if we would have dated, had the dance not been cancelled. He got kind of excited and was like, "You wanna go out now?" And we started laughing and then we're like, "Wait, we just started talking hahah". So after that, we texted nonstop for 3 days straight and it was really nice. He told me he had a number of crushes, but that the biggest one was me. I thought maybe we had a chance to go out. Then we started talking about going out and he said that there was only one thing holding him back. And it was because of my friends. A couple of them are gay (a guy and girl) and some are kind of annoying (I'm not the most popular person, but I do love my friends hahah) And he said that his friends made fun of my friends sometimes and he was afraid of what they would say if he went out w/ me. Kind of egotistical rite? Like I said, he had a different group of friends now who were more popular and I guess it got to his head. It pretty much pissed me off, but I didn't say anything, just that I understood. But after that, we stopped talking again. Except when he saw me in the hallway, he would always smile and say "hey". And we gave each other the occassional pic comment on myspace (He always said I was cute and all). That was around December. So from December until the end of April, we would sometimes say "hey" in the hallway and have the occassional nice times when we got to talk for a little bit, like at the school musical (He was in it, and I was an usher w/ some of my friends). Then prom came around (May 4). Near the end of the night, he asked me to dance (I was ecstatic hahah but didn't let it show). It was really nice, but then he had to go, so he gave me a hug said good-bye and smiled. A couple weeks went by, in which not much happened.
Now the final phase of this question. A little less than a week ago, I had a dream about him. To keep it short, at one point, he asked for a hug, so I hugged him and he gave me a kiss on the cheek (a very nice one, I might add ;]). I flipped out, once I woke up and discovered it was only a dream. And now, ever since then, I've been going crazy. It's like my feelings for him exploded, like an exponential growth, if that makes sense. I've been going crazy this past week, crying when I think about him. It's so bad. I have no idea what to do, and even prayed to God about it (although I've got no answer yet). Saturday night, though, we had another "moment" if you want to call it that. I went to the chorus concert, because a lot of my friends are in it. I came in really late, because of work, so I ended up setting against the wall in the back. I watched him and I almost started crying and I couldn't stop shaking. Once it was over, I went backstage to find my friends. I saw the usual, gave them hugs, and told them good job and all. Then Drew saw me and gave me kind of a half-hug and said hi. I went to talk to my friend Sam after that. He came back and hugged me again. And then he said it wasn't long enough and that we would have to do it again hahah. So we hugged a third time and started talking again (needless to say, I can't remember a THING we talked about). So then he left for a bit and came back wearing a viking hat w/ blonde pigtail braids on it. Being weird I guess. So I was like, "Wow.. that's attractive." So we laughed for a bit, but I had to go, so he hugged me again (:D). Today, I had finals, so our schedules were all screwed up, and I never got a chance to see him.
I casually commented him today about the viking hat, and he was online at the time, but never commented me back. :[
So of course, I'm very sad right now. My mom and friends think I might be in love, but I think that's a strong word. All I know is, I REALLY like this boy. It's killing me knowing I'm not w/ him right now. I'm freaking out. I graduate next Thursday. Tomorrow is my last day of finals and Wednesday is the senior's last day of school. I'm afraid if I don't do something now, nothing will ever happen. I'm afraid of not seeing him ever again. I feel like I can't live w/o him. I don't know what to do. I'm afraid if I tell him how I feel, he'll either not say anything back, or reject me, which I know I can't handle. I can't tell if he likes me or not. I'm pretty sure he does, from the way we texted back in December and some of the things that he said. But he's sending me mixed signals and I have no idea what to think or what to do. Please help me, I don't know what to say to him or what to do. And he's REALLY FREAKING CUTE!! HELPPP!!!
Thanks in advance, sorry this was so long, but I feel like I needed to tell you everything in order for you to understand more. :/ I know I've left things out, but it's long enough already. If you need more info, let me know.
Signed,
Lost and Confused. :/ (link)
|
those girls answered your question really... its soo true if you like him enough to make you cry that meens you really must love him.. it sounds like you love him. but anyways i think the best thing to do is definantly tell him everything you pretty much told us summarized to him.. I know you think he may reject you and im not gonna make any promises yeah he might and yet he might not.. but putting your feelings out on the table and walking away with nothing is way better than walking away with all of those feelings stuck inside of you .. you dont want to go about your life always thinking oh what if.. even if you do move on he will most likely always be in your thoughts.... In my opinion he seems like the type of guy who will give it a shot.. once again tho if he doesnt it will be much easier to get over him knowing what his feelings are.. but anyways.. about his friends hes graduating your graduating so if he did think that (which he deffff. didnt meen it in a mean rude way) its all over anyways becuase those friends hes not gonna see as often because of college so he wont have to worry about them being mean and if theyre graduating and they do make fun of your friends theyre just plain immature for their age because at that age your supposed to be more accepting .. but he also meant it in a way that he doesnt want to loose his friends but he doesnt want to loose you kinda thing.. im sure the things his friends say he probbaly doesnt agree if he likes you. i really think you should give this a shot soon the next time you see him as a matter of fact be like i really wanna talk to you dont get scared.. something like that because after all ... its not like your doing all the chasing hes come up to you randomly without anyone telling him to so he must really like you..
Good luck.. tell me how it goes haha im interested i hope it all works out for the best!!
|
|
Ok, well recently I met this kid from another school. He's like best friends with my really good friend from that school. Anyway, we have a lot in common, he's easy to talk too, and not to mention the SWEETEST and nicest kid you'll ever meet. But hes not the cutest or most popular kid either. When I'm with him alone I like him a lot and I want to be with him. But when we're in a group I kind of think "Oh my God what am i thinking" and I want him to back off. I don't know whats wrong with me? At times I like him, other times I don't. I am a girl who bases a lot on looks, so I don't know if thats it or not. Please help... (link)
| |
if you really like him his looks shouldnt bother you that much.. dont worry what he looks like hes sweet personality matters. your lucky to have him.. dont base everything on looks.. think about it what would you think if he based on looks and didnt think you were the prettyest girl.. itd hurt just like him for who he is on the inside not the outsdie
|
|
There is this boy that i like and he likes me 2 but wen he gets around his friends he starts talking about me and my crew but wen it is just me and him he tells me how beautiful i am and how smart but idk if he is going 2 be nice 2 me 1 sec but the next talk about me and my friends how will our relationship Go if we ever become bf/gf please give me advice (female,14) (link)
|
someone asked almost the same question... this is the way most guys are they will do that .. he likes you yeah he does and if you two get into a relationship trust me this will all change he will not try to hurt you at all he wont do that.. and if he does trust me hes not worth your time.. a lot of guys do this becuase they dont want to show that they have emotions and feelings and a sensitive side they jsut want to show the typical tough man side of them.. it should change if you guys get really close and go out.
hope i helped
|
Ok there is this one guy that i have know for a while and i used to like him alot... he lives about an hour away. I used to send him provocative pictures of myself, we had planned to hook up the next time we saw eachother we liked eachother alot well i got a boyfriend.. and things started to change but i still sent him pictures online. Well now me and my bf have been dating for 8 months and he has a gf of 2 weeks. I emailed him and asked him if he would like to see some resent pictures suprisingly he said yes i thought since he had a gf he wouldnt want to see them but he did so i sent them to him. My boyfriend doesnt know and neither does his girlfriend. I love my boyfriend alot but doing this isn't right... but i still like the other guy. If we seen eachother again i think something would happen and i sort of want it to...but then i think about my boyfriend and id feel bad cuz i know he cares about me alot... but then its like... idk.
any advice or anything? (link)
| |
i really really think you should take a break with your boyfriend or something.. because like you said no that isnt right.. its almost as if your cheating.. if you have feelings for someone else while your in a relationship that shows you dont really like the guy your with that much.. i dont think your boyfriend would be too happy if he found out so just take a break from him.. maybe youll hook up with this other guy or something and if you want it to happen thats fine if it does.. but jsut dont let it happen while you have a boyfriend. because youll end up hurting him and he'll just get really pissed at you and it wont be good.. talk to your boyfriend
|
last night was like the first time i hung out with this guy that i like now . he goes to to school with me n we see each other in the hallway but we never really knew each other more than our names. when we hung out i realized i really like this guy.
we were hanging with a bunch of people at first but then they all left and there were these other two people still hanging out with us but they both liked each other so they were like together the hole night and i felt that he was trying to me over by him and like be like the other two people cause he kept like saying my name and talking to me on and off and like laying down ((i thought he might have wanted to lay with me )) but i never gotten in a relationship with a boy before so i didn't know what to do and i'm in 8th grade if that helps (link)
|
i cant really tell what your question is but i think your asking if he likes you??
he might actually like you but he probably doesnt know completely.. you need to hang out with him a little more to get those feelings out you know you cant really get to know someone in one night of not completely talking.. get to know him more and maybe youll both end up liking each other
|
Okay, I need outside advice. I'm 19/f, Just a warning, this is gonna be long - it's complicated. So there are these two guys: my ex boyfriend and my current boyfriend.
My ex and I dated officially for about seven months, but then lost the titles and were still acting like a couple for quite awhile, then decided to call it friends with benefits, because neither of us were ready for the emotions that came with our relationship. He's kind of an ass, but he loved me, and still does. He's basically everything I look for in a guy, except for the fact that he's a little insecure. Now THIS is where it gets really complicated...
My current boyfriend is/(used to be?) my ex's friend. He's also a lot of what I look for in a guy, but he keeps backing down from sex. Not to say that sex is everything in a relationship, but it's important to me.
The fiasco started when me and my boyfriend went to canada to club/drink this past wednesday with a couple of our other friends, including my ex's brother. My boyfriend decided not to tone down the PDAs even though the ex's brother was there, and he saw us making out at least once.
One of the friends told my ex, who blocked my boyfriend on line, and as soon as I got on line, (my cellphone was dead) confronted me about it. Well, sort of. He beat around the bush, asking me how canada was and trying to see if I'd tell him about my boyfriend. I wasn't going to, of course, no one in their right mind would, but his friend told him, and he eventually admitted that. He then verbally assaulted me for about an hour and a half while threatening to kick the shit out of my boyfriend until I got him calmed down enough to admit that he still had feelings for me, and felt horribly betrayed and upset by two of his closest friends.
(I mean, I can understand that. Though, he overreacts a lot, and he is a bit of a drama queen.)
But the worst thing is, I still have feelings for my ex, and I told him. Things got weird a few months ago and I felt like he was using me as a random hookup insted of treating me like a friend, and I told him my feelings were gone. Now he knows I lied.
But then there's my guy, who's incredibly sweet, charming, good looking, great body, great personality, GREAT kisser...Only thing he doesn't have is the asshole side that my ex does. But my ex loves me, and I have always felt that we'd wind up together again even if we did break up and meet new people, because our connection was just that strong.
So my options appear to be:
1. Keep my guy and lose my ex completely
2. Keep my ex and lose my guy as a boyfriend, and possibly as a friend.
3. Mess around with both of them and pray that neither one finds out, or
4. Lose both of them.
I have strong feelings for both guys, and I've never had that problem before. I'm not an indecisive person.
Thing with the ex is that he's still not really ready for a relationship again. I don't know if I would be ready to be with him again either.
Thing with my boyfriend is that he's apparently not ready for anything but kissing, which sort of makes me feel like I don't really have a boyfriend.
Help!! (link)
|
Well this same thing just happened with my brother and his girlfriend..
the only problem is that if you do decide to keep the ex and loose the boyfriend like you said the boyfriend will be gone for good.. and he seems like such a sweet guy .. if your this confused you really should take time and be alone and see which one you are dying to see more.. that will show you which one you want.. my opinion would be to keep the boyfriend becuase even though he doesnt want anything more than kissing now.. that will eventually change but the assholeness in the ex will probably never change.. so the boyfriend seems to be and always will be an awesome person. I know you feel that the ex has always been your love and you are meant to be and will eventaully be togehter in the end, but i think its just because he was probably one of your first true loves and everyone alwways thinks those are their true lovers its just cause you havent given a full out shot to another guy with full feelings in the relationship.. and not half of your feelings in one guy and half in the other..you havent fully moved on which you probably should try even though its hard it will take a while, but if hes an asshole like you say he is you really shouldnt make room for an asshole in your life you dont want those problems....whatever you do do nottttt mess around with both of them that will lead you to a hugeee mess and youll be left with nothing in the end.... like i said when you were with the ex you probably only thought abuot him but since hes still on your mind your not concentrated on the one guy try to clear your mind of one of them
idk if that was too confusing but i hope i helped.. this is a hard situation i know.. love sucks
|
|
Hey everyone. Ok so theres this new kid in my school lets call him, shawn. Anyway Shawn and I are really good friends now and we sit next to each other in the classes we have together. I don't know when, but at some point, I fell for Shawn and I fell hard. I think he likes me to because we are always flirting and when I'm not in school he always talks about me and says he wishes I was there. Heres the problem though. Shawn has a girlfriend. Kiley and him are neighbors now so I think thats how they got together but it bugs me because I know that he likes me! Even people I'm not friends with tell me how obvious it is. And I just know that I know more about him and care more about him then Kiley. I have no idea what to do because I like him so much and I am not the type of person to break up someones relationship. Any advice at all? ♥ (link)
| |
Your right he is probably jsut with her because it was the first girl he met when he moved to your area. Since he likes you and hes going out with this girl.. you dont really have to do much because if he likes you this much he will eventually soon realize that he cant do this to that girl and he will break up with her..
|
okay so i really like this guy and everyone thinks that he likes me. And i am not really sure but it does seem like it sometimes. Like if i act like i like him or call him he is okay but he kind of acts like whatever. And then the next day i will hardly say anything to him and he will be all over me like hugging me and throwing food at me and stuff. And i knoe the saying 'all guys want what they cant have' but i really dont get it. What can i do to make this guy like me always???he tells people he doesnt want a gf so does that mean he is one of those "player"types?? please help!
Thanx (link)
| |
yeah he probably does like you.. you should just do what your doing now and since he said he doesnt want a girlfriend.. just talk to him and be the best you can and hope he changes his mind but dont seem too attached becuase he might not like it if he realizes your crazy about him i dont think it meens he's a player type.. i know plenty of guys that say that.. and maybe he doesnt want a girlfriend or maybe he really just doenst know what he wants.. make him want you
|
Well, I have a bf, but I also have huge crush on my closest guy friend, lets call him Alex. You see, I hadn't seen my bf in days or talked to him. But I decided to go over to Alex's house to do homework and study because we had a test and homework due the next day. Well after we got done we looked at our yearbook and he pointed out his gf and it was really fun, but then we watched a horror movie, and I hate horror movies. Well during the movie, I started cuddling up with Alex. He put his arm around me and we kindve started to make-out. He said he loved me and that he also loves his gf. Well im afraid my bf is going to figure out what happened and get pissed off and kick Alex's ass. Well anyways, what should I do.
P.S. srry if this is a bit long
(link)
|
thats really hard but you should seriously try talking to your boyfriend alex i know that is scary but you should before it gets worse, if you have any doubts like this while your in a relationship... like for example having feelings for other guys like you do like that.. it meens your confused and you really must not have full feelings for your boyfriend that you thought you did.. I think that you might need a break from your boyfriend to clear yourself up and try to figure out what you want.. or else your going to hurt him really bad...
hope we helped,
stephandjess
|
|