BabyShammy's advice column | BabyShammy's Advice About Love Life

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Q: Hi Im A 21 year old female. and im stressing. I Have a 24 year old boyfriend i have been with for the past 2years and a half. in this relationship i have bin cheated on,beaten up i have practically been abused mentally physically and emotinally. he say he love , i guess in his own ways.but i have been dealing with him and his baby mama to much. dont get me wrong i do love him. but i felt he stopped my life completly. i wanted to go to college or to the military and he didnt want me to go. but i was dumb. anyways i went away for training which i had to beg him to let me go, eventually he did. before i left i found out he cheated on me with his baby mama again. so when i went away i found someone.A 25 year old firefighter. someone who treated me like i have never been treated before, he respects me, he loves me, hes offering me the world, my mom spoke to him and she like him, so i had plan to leave my boyfriend to go to live with this guys now. i would love to be with this guy so much but my boyfriend refuses to let me go. now these days he all of a sudden want me and promises me to treat me good, but he promised that before.everytime i speak to my baby i smile he makes me feel happy something i havent been feeling in a long time, this is my story i dont know what do do, im a Virgo In Distress and i just cant figure out what to do. please help me, this is my future.

In my opinion, this guy who your with (the one with the baby's mama) is dirt. No offence but if he's going to abuse you, you don't need him, if he really did love u he wouldn't beat you, hunny that is not a relationship that is a hell for u, no woman or man deserves to be in a relationship where they are beaten up and abused. Also no man or women who beats up or abuses their partner doesn't derserve to have a relationship in my opinion. Also, I believe that if you really do love the 25 year old firefighter then you should follow your heart, don't let his abusive ways stop you, go with the firefighter and if he will not let you be, or if he trys to harm you or him, I would honestly insist getting the police invovled you do not need that in your life, do not let anyone stop you from following your dreams and improving on your life. I hop eI have helped and I'm sorry if I didn't. Plz rate.

Q: I have been in a serious relationship with my boyfriend for 3 years. During that time, we have had some problems but have worked them out and have been doing very well, until lately. I don't know why I did this, but I cheated on my boyfriend with someone who is a very close friend of mine and have even developed strong feelings for...but I still honestly love my boyfriend. I didn't know it was possible for me to not only cheat, but do it for a few months while my boyfrined thought everything was fine. I also didn't know it was possible for me to love two people at the same time.

So, as much as it hurt to do this, I told my boyfriend about everything yesterday and, of course, he is beyond hurt. I knew I had to come clean with him to start setting things right. I want to be with my boyfriend and that's why I needed to tell him - to start to put the trust back in the relationship. However, I am still very confused about my feelings for the other guy, which are very valid and real (and he feels them for me as well). It killed me to hurt my boyfriend like that, and to keep something going outside the relationship for so long, but I really need advice at this point. I am lost and don't know what to do... thanks for any help!

Oh my god, I've been there me and my boyfriend have been together for over 3 1/2 years and it was love at first site, when I told him about the other guy, he totally rejected me, but in a couple days he called me back and wanted to meet up. We are going strong again now, and it was because I told him, as you told your boyfriend, I honestly think that they would rather hear it from your then from someone else so you did the right thing by telling him...... the other guy needs to know that you really do love your boyfriend and that this can't go on....if you think you love the other guy more then maybe it's time to ask for a break try something different.... if your really miserable with this other guy then you know your boyfriend was the one true guy.... but if your happy with the other man then you know what your heart wants. That or ask for a break and be single for a while....just to be able to think about what you need and what you want.......I know that it will be hard but maybe it's the best way to go because being with him constantly is going to make it even harder, time apart could be what you really need....it could show you just how much you really do love him...... I hope that I helped and sorry if I never....plz rate...

-BabyShammy-

Q: I've never had an orgasm. I mastubate and am with a steady bf. He's my 4th bf. I reckon if reaching orgasm is 10 then I can probably get to a 9 but never reach a 10! Its very anoyying. I don't like vibrators, they don't turn me on, I usually use a pillow, that is the most effective. I love my clitoris to be stimulated! But I never come! Why not? I'm mature enough, and feel safe in my relationship. What can I do?

Hunny, sorry to tell you but some people just can't get to that point and it's ok, it's not like theres something wrong, many people think that they are mature enough but some peoples body are just not ready for that 10 yet, it may feel like you are but the body knows best and when u are ready your body will let you know, one of these days it will just happen. Everybody's body matures at a different rate and urs might be maturing slower than others. Just think of it this way, if your body is maturing slowler than others it will be amizing the first time because you've come so close to it before.

Another solution is to get your man to try soemthing different maybe what hes doing is just not working for you........maybe you need a bit more stimulation.......

I hope that I helped and if you need anything else just ask....... lots of love.....Baby Shammy

Q: Hi im a 16 year old girl and I have been dating this girl for 3 months now but we dont really talk, and i can tell my friends think i should break up with her, but i really like her and i want to go out with her but i want us to talk more what should i do?

Talk to her, tell her u need to comunicate more or the relationship just won't work. Ask her if she feels the same way, if u both agree work a time schedule that way u know when shes gonna call or u know when ur supposed to call.If u have sumthing to do call her and change the time to later. Try that and if it doesn't work find another way to communicate latters,email, something simple.

Q: You see, whenever I fly on airplanes, I usually get airsick, and I begin to throw up. But just a few months ago, I didn't throw up, so I was pretty happy. But last week, I just found out that my bf's mom invited me to Las Vegas, so we're taking a plane. I'm really scared that I'll throw up. AND I don't wanna be ashamed. What should I do to keep me from puiking? It seems so uncool typing this on an advice column but no one knows who I am anyways.

My answer to u is take Gravol thats what i take beforre i get on aplane cuz i always used t get sick but u won't if u take gravol.It keeps ur stomach from getting upset which usually makes u throw up.Try Gravol, n just relax don't think about throing up cuz that can usually trigger it too.Hope everythin works out.

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If you need any help, come to me, i've been through so much and have given myself so much advice.I know what I am talking about because I helped myself through my mom having Cancer.I helped myself through a friends death. I helped myself through all family members deaths. If you need help with anything, just ask, i'm always hear to help, I'll try to answer your questions as soon as possible (2 or 3 days). Thank you! I hope that I can help with any questions that I get!