(Ask A Question.) (Feedback.) (Discussion Board.) (Make Razhie A Favourite.) (Advicenators.)
Razhie. Advicenators Member Since: June 13, 2005. Answers: 5077. Visitors: 211514.
Favourite Collumnists.
(WittyUsernameHere.) (karenR.) (NinjaNeer.) (rainbowcherrie.) (DangerNerd.)
The Question
Would I be wrong if I chose to tell some people, but not others what baby names I have in mind? I don’t plan to tell anyone except a few people because I don’t want to hear any criticism or suggestions. I feel like we're living in a time period where the trends of using unique names and of bringing classic names back are overlapping each other. Not everyone's going to like my ANY name I could possibly pick out and it seems like few people can hold their tongues about it.
I don’t think I could keep a secret from my mom as she and I are very close. But I’m afraid my dad will think some names are silly and will make jokes about them, not in a mean way, but in an annoying way. For instance, the name I'm planning now is Nicholas, and I can imagine my dad calling him St. Nicholas (Santa Clause’s name). I also like Joseph for another boy and I can hear him asking Joseph where Mary and Jesus are. I love my dad and want to tell him, but I’m not up for those jokes. I want to tell my sister as well as she and I are also close, but I’m not close to her husband and don’t want him to know my names because he'll likely say something to p--- me off.
I don't want any of them to tell anyone else because I'm already getting a headache with all of the criticism and suggestions. I suppose other than Nicholas Andrew, my favorite name is William Trent. I know people will call the nickname Will common and boring and that William and Trent don't go well together (call me weird, but I kind of like names that don't go well together to a certain point). I want to keep my names for ALL of my children a secret from Friends, coworkers, distant relatives, and my brother in law. Is this wrong?
The Answer
You need to either develop a backbone, or not tell anyone what names you are considering.
It's not wrong to pick and choose who you want to speak too, but it is wrong to be so damn sensitive and fearful of what others will say. It's wrong to imagine that no one else is allowed to have an opinion on a whole bunch of names you are just considering right now.
You are perfectly entitled to choose the names you like, and you don't have to tell anyone you don't want too what those names are. However, once you start telling some people, they are allowed to have opinions! And even if you ask them not too, they might tell other people they are close too, like their husbands.
If you want to keep these names secret, then you need to keep them secret, and not speak to anyone about it. Otherwise, you are taking the risk that people may have opinions, and may say those opinions out loud. If you can't handle that, then it would be wrong to tell anyone what names you are considering until you have chosen one, and then you can tell people it is what is, and not to be jerks about the actual name you have selected. But if you can't handle any opinion other than your own while you still making up your mind, then don't share the information with anyone until you have made up your mind.
(View All Other Answers.)