jazzyvanscoy's advice column

Hi everyone, 23 and female here...
I saw the red flags, but I had just come out of an emotionally abusive relationship; I refused to believe that I had run straight into a worse situation...but I had.
I've been free of him since mid-October, when I took the day off work, gathered my things, and left. We were living together in the house he bought to share with me, talking about marriage and kids...I know it sounds bizarre, given the abuse, but in his own sick way, he loved me. I never doubted that...and I loved him. If I listed the qualities of my dream guy, I would almost describe him. I dreamed of spending my life with him until he started to physically hurt me.

So here's my problem:
When I left him, I turned off my emotions. If I had let myself feel, I knew I wouldn't have been able to do it. Until this past Saturday, I've been pleasantly numb. I'm very busy, I have a lot of responsibility at work, and I don't have time or energy to waste on being upset. All of a sudden, that logic doesn't seem to be helping, and I find myself biting back tears all the time. I realized that I know only two ways to cope with things: to suppress what I'm feeling completely, or to let it take over.
I have a therapist, but I don't think I'm getting what I need from her. I've seen seven different therapists in my short life and none of them have been able to help me. I'm also on an antidepressant, and STILL having these problems.

I know this is kind of vague, but I don't know what to ask, exactly. I just...need help...any help. Please.

Thanks to all who try.

Okay, I'm sorry, but you have no right to say that to me. I'm sorry I tried to help.... I'm only 13.... So no need to cuss at me. Thanks

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(Rating: 2) I'm sorry, but if you're going to basically mooch a response off someone else and try to put a twist on it, you may want to actually read the question. I already left the bastard. Your response was thus unrelated to my question.

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