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I hope that if you come to this site, you feel at least some reassurance. Life is messy, life isn't perfect, and I love that there is a place, virtual as it is that can acknowledge this. I don't pretend to be perfect or know everything, but I promise that if you ask me a question, or if I see one and take an interest, I will answer it as best I can.Check out my forum here:
http://www.advicenators.com/talkaboutme.php?userboard_id=41589
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advice
well let me tell you all a story and whoever wants to can help me out.
about 3 years ago me and this boy Erin fell for eachother. my best gal pal melanie thought he was hot as well. we both agreed we wouldnt get mad at eachother if he just so happend to go out with one of us. we he just so happend to go out with me. she wasnt upset at all infact her and her new bf and me and erin would double date. well all of a sudden OUT OF NOWHERE i lost feelings for him. i really didnt want anything to do with him and didnt want to be near him. i ignored his phone calls and everything. i broke up with him through melanie on the internet, lame i know but it was the strangest thing! i dont know what came over me i just stop likiung him and began to actually hate him! i mean we got in a couple little fights and he ditched me on my b-day--i guess there were a few things that he did that relly got to me. anyways i really angered him and broke his heart so me and melanie developed a plan. she wasnt really into her bf but she did think erin was hot and we both new that. so0o afetr i broke his heart we decided for melanie to sweep in, make him happy again and they would go out. It worked. they dated for 2 years. i was absolutely fine with it. of course when we were all together i had no problem not speaking to erin. well over the years me and melanie drifted apart-she moved a far distance away from me and what not. well theyr relationship has diminished. melanie has
new bf she cheated on him with and all erin did was hold another girls hand at the mall. so they did eachother wrong but something very strange has happend to me. Ive been talking to erin alot. its like we were when we were together. i mean i always knew he was a fantastic guy! thats why it was so hard to figure out for myself why i left him. i think i like alot again. i thinkhe feels the same way. we joke about the past and about my sudden change of heart. im glad me and himare friends again but i dont know what to do. i want to see and he wants to see me. what if we go back out! i actually would love that! i think back then i was young and confused and hormoinal lol. ive grown up alot and have had other long term boyfriends. i dont think melanie would mind. i mean i would obviously talk to her about it but not until i know things for sure. so what do you advicenators think of my situation!!!!
Well it all depends on those stupid things that bugged you before. If they were serious (which it doesn't sound like they were) I'd advise against the relationship. However, if you've gotten over the birthday ditching scenario, and you don't think the things that used to bug you about Erin will bug you now, I'd say go for it!
If you both want to see each other, I think it'd be a good idea since there aren't any huge reasons why you shouldn't. It seems like Melanie has moved on from Erin, and since you aren't that close with her, dating him shouldn't be a big deal.
I'd be careful though, especially if it's like he just came out his relationship with Melanie. You may want to take it slower at first, because of this, and also because you might be less likely to lose interest in each other.
Good luck =]
(Rating: 5) thank you so so much for your advice! you seem like you are made for advicenators! lol thanks again