phatdopelove's advice column

Its been almost one year since this all began. It all started early September and when Josh broke up with me September 21st 2006 I went into a huge depression. I cut my wrists, stopped talking for a little, and completley lost myself. Since he broke up with me hes only gone out with one other girl, my best friend, but hes gone out with her 5 times off and on. But he has gone out with me about 5 times off and on too. So theres this tension between me and my bff now. But also since he broke up with my I kept trying to replace him with someone else. On my second try (Steven) is when things went out of control because when he broke up with me the entire depression thing got worse and I don't know who I am, or who I am supposed to be. Now I'm doubting whether or not I love my current bf. Am I just trying to replace Steven? Or am I still trying to replace Josh? For a while I had no problem saying I love you. But my sister said "Ever since Josh you haven't been the same" and Im shocked at how right she is. How do I find myself again, but now that I think about it I don't even know if I want my old self back because I always hated the way I was. And now im just so confused. I don't really have a specific question but what's your opinion on this whole thing? Please anyone help me.

Well I think that since you're depressed you try to make yourself happy by occupying yourself with someone else, but everytime it doesn't work out you feel even more depressed and then you tend to look at your past relationships thinking you probably could have done this or that to make the relationship work, your wishing you probably could go back on it but you can't.

You want the depression to go away but you're really not solving it by slitting your wrists. Slitting your wrist, you can hit an artery, you could worry and know what are you gonna do?, die.

I'm sorry but committing suicide is a terrible way of trying to get out of life. God gave you life, and gives you a chance to live it, people go when its there time, and for you its not your time, God decides that. You look to the negative things in your life, but don't look at the negatives focus on the positive things in your life, and you cant say you don't have any, if you're saying that to yourself thats what causes more of a depression for you.

Look at the negative things on a more positive side, I know it would be hard, but look at it that way, and you can say: I'm happy and thankful for the relationships I've had, I've had these people care for me, and I can learn from my past relationships so I won't make the same mistakes in the future. Only you can make yourself feel better, other people can help you but they dont want to dwell in other peoples sorrows all the time so they tend to stay away from it.

It's not good to dwell in your own sorrow, you can better yourself by not doing that, listen to a song that can really inspire you and keep you going, you have so much to live for , life is already too short to just sit around and do nothing. Best of luck to you, and hope this helps and sorry so long!

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(Rating: 5) your advice was the best thank you

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