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Q: I am 15 years old and so is my boyfriend. There is this girl that he talks to that has been his friend for years. They both say that they are brother and sister type friends. I believe them but I have really big jealousy issues. This girl is skinnier than I, and prettier. I recently got into a fight with my boyfriend because when he went to his friends house she showed up. I ignored his calls and everything. Well, this girl Instant Messaged me asking me if he could go to San Francisco with her tomorrow to hang out with her and her mother because it is her birthday and she has no one else to go with and doesn't want to go alone. I want to feel sad and just cry thinking about. But they're just friends, right? Should I just let him go and face my jealousy and see if it helps me get over it? Or should I put my foot down and object of the whole thing?

I'm sorry but I have a different answer than everyone else. You have every right to let your boyfriend know that you are not comfortable with this and it has nothing to do with the fact that they have been friends, it's him going on a little trip with another female. It may be an innocent friendship, but it's not innocent to the girlfriend.

The only thing I see wrong with the way you're acting is that you get jumpy when you find out that he went somewhere and she showed up. That is where you have to deal with the fact that he has friendships with other girls.
They will see each other sometimes and they will talk sometimes.

I really don't know how long you and your boyfriend have been together, but you have to be upfront with your jealousy so that he can comfort and assure you that you are the girl that he would choose over any other girls. And he should be absolutely understanding of the fact that you don't want him to go on this trip with her. Besides, this friend of his will be just fine with her mom since it's her birthday. She just needs to celebrate and spend time with her mom instead of dragging your boyfriend with her.

Plus, this isn't something to discuss with his friend. This situation is between you and your boyfriend, and if you don't start confronting your feelings and jealousy then you'll find that he just won't understand your outbursts and sudden anger. He also will start to get upset that you aren't answering his phone calls. Ignoring the phone calls will not make you more comfortable or feeling better about what's going on.

-TheTeenGirl

Rating: 5

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My name is Erin and I am now 18 years old. You may realize through out looking at my column, some of you love me and some of you flat out hate me. There's really no gray area with me I guess you can say.

I haven't given advice here in so long and it's only because I got caught up in life. But I'm more mature than I ever thought I could be.
So anyway I'm here again. It's been a long time, but I still love giving advice and still plan on it in the future.

Everyone should feel free to Private Message me for advice, I can be harsh, but I'm always trying to help someone by giving them the truth they need.

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