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Q: A couple days ago, on myspace, I was on my friends page, and I saw this guy [one of his skater friends] and I thought he was hott and he lives in my town, and he's my age, so I figured I'd add him as a friend because there are good chances of us already knowing each other. Well it turned out to be one of my ex-boyfriends from a few years ago. You know. We dated when we were young. I was like 13-14 or something. Now I am 17 & He's 18. Well when we were together he liked me a lot and he was really sweet and everything. Like a perfect boyfriend, but we were young, so it really didn't matter. Well now we found out who each other is, and we can't believe we are talking again after these years have gone by. Well the problem is, I have been talking to him again for a couple of days and we talk on the phone and stuff, but he tells me how cute I am, and he brags about me, and he TELLS ME HE LOVES ME. I don't know what to do. I don't want to ignore him anymore, I just want to be friends because I have my most recent ex boyfriend whom I love very much and he just got a job for me and everything.
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If you want this guy to realize that you only want to be friends, then first of let him know verbally. Tell up up front that you are still in love with another guy from the past so you aren't ready to be in a relationship with anyone due to these feelings.
Secondly, have bounderies. Don't lead him on when you both talk on the phone. Don't say anything that will make him think you want more. Now, seeing as you've just been out of a relationship, you probably are feeling vulnerable. Usually when you feel vulnerable, you tend to take any guy who is willing to talk to you or take care of you. You might even convince yourself that you like this guy when really it's just you feeling lonely.
Besides, this guy isn't in love with you. I promise. He might have strong feelings for you, but it's not love and he may think it's all love or fate because you both were once in a relationship young. Which can feel special when you have a past together so he's probably feeling overwhelmed with the history and being reunited, so don't let him stop you from letting him know that you don't want anything more with him.
-TheTeenGirl
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Your advice was so well put. Thanks, so much! =]
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bio
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My name is Erin and I am now 18 years old. You may realize through out looking at my column, some of you love me and some of you flat out hate me. There's really no gray area with me I guess you can say.
I haven't given advice here in so long and it's only because I got caught up in life. But I'm more mature than I ever thought I could be.
So anyway I'm here again. It's been a long time, but I still love giving advice and still plan on it in the future.
Everyone should feel free to Private Message me for advice, I can be harsh, but I'm always trying to help someone by giving them the truth they need.
About My Ratings:
I enjoy ratings. And if I ask a question on here, I always rate the person. If you work hard to give advice, you deserve to be rated.
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Info
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Website: Gender: Female Age: 17 Member Since: January 18, 2005 Answers: 1364 Last Update: December 8, 2007 Visitors: 82340
Main Categories:
Favorite Columnists
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