about

My mission on Advicenators is to be honest. People lie when they answer because they want to be rated high, but I think people ask strangers on Advicenators things because they want an honest answer.
My alias is Farren, and I'm in 9th grade. I think I'm mature for my age, but that could just be self-dilusion. I believe that everyone is in some way self-dilusional. So yeah, ask me a question if you want.

advice

i have one friend that seems to be mad at me and my other friend and we have asked her if she is mad at us and she says no. My friend and i dont know what to do. We really want to be friends with her but i just dont know what to do

She's just changed. It's not that she wants to be your enemy, she just doesn't want to hang out with you guys anymore. People don't have to be friends or enemies, just be neutral. Just leave her alone, she's changed and you've grown apart.
Sorry if I sound mean, I'm trying to be honest, no harmful intentions.
-Farren

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i have my ex and i havent talked to him in 4 years i breakup was hard and sudden but i dont want to be his enemy forever i want us to be at least friends and i dont know if i should talk to him or just leave him alone and i think this girl has a HUGE crush on him and i dont want to get in it and mess it up i really need some advice i dont know what to do

If it were me I probably wouldn't get in touch with him again. You haven't talked to him in 4 years. I think my logic is that people don't have to be friends or enemies, they can just be neutral. I probably think this because there are some people who I used to be friends with and it's not like I dislike them now, but I've changed and we don't really fit anymore and I don't see why they act like they're obligated to hang out with me and me with them still. I don't know why people can't just leave each other alone.
But I'm getting into a much more complicated little theory of mine, and don't want to get too off-topic, so yeah. Hope I helped.
-Farren

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okay ... i had a crush on this guy , and would always flirt and stuff , but after he started liking me , i stopped liking him .It's kinda like now i completely dislike him , i hate his confused look , i hate the way he tries to make me laugh ... i just don't like him !! Why is this happening to me ?

That sort of happened to me before. I talked to this guy a lot and liked him, then he liked me, and I don't know why but I started to dislike him. It didn't have anything to do with him liking me, it was just that I got to know him better and he wasn't how I thought he was, maybe it's the same thing for you, and it has nothing to do with the fact he started to like you.
The guy and I are cool now, we don't like each other anymore, but I don't hate him anymore either, so try giving it time. Maybe you just changed, that's what was happening to me too. I think I don't hate him anymore because I've matured and I don't really hate anyone anymore.
-Farren

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Ok heres the problem..my hair is about to my shoulder and it is very thick..also very poofy. what should i do to make my hair not as poofy? i tried straightening it..that didn't work but also i have a crappy straightner. I hate my hair! Can someone help me? please!! thanx in advance!

Relax your hair, you can get it done at a hair cut place. Or, you could get it layered, so it won't be as thick.
Consulting with a hair stylist before getting it done would be best. Hope I helped.
-Farren

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I want to tell my friend something.. Cause they have something going on..the way they think.. I have my own theorys.. and I think I think I might be able to realte to them but i'm scared.. cause they see me as an ignorant little person...Iv proposed this fake smile and stupid act for a while now and im not sure what i should do cause It's time to be serious..

Never feel like you can't be yourself. Don't worry what other people think about you. You should always be able to be honest with your friends. I say you tell them your theories, maybe they'll agree with some of the things you say. Besides, if they already see you as ignorant, you have nothing to lose, they might respect what you say and hold a higher opinion of you after hearing your perspective on things.
Anyways, good luck.
-Farren

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I been having a lot of problems latley!!!! well i've been cutting because well my best friend started going out with the guy i relle relle loved, even though she loves him to i didn't want her to go out with him but she did and i'm happy for her and all but i wish i was his girlfriend instead and this boy he is our relle good friend we can depend our lives on him! i luv him and he luvs me just he only wants me as a friond so i've been cutting but the thing is my best friend found out and she didn't tell any1 but i thought that the boy relle should know because he's a big partr of this and now they kno and i feel so ashamed that i cut i want to stop causei don't want them unhapy and i don't want any1 to find out but i rele do want to keep doing it cause it helps me!!!!!

Thanx,

~lost lover~

"but i thought that the boy relle should know because he's a big partr of this " Are you sure you aren't doing this for attention? It sounds like you want the boy to find out, feel guilty, and comfort you. There are other guys, and he just wants to be friends, cutting yourself won't make him notice you in the way you want him to.
-Farren

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would u fuck me?

If I were to drop my morals and fuck someone, sure. But, we already went through this, didn't we?
Heh, you must be bored, or horny.

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how do i tell someone that is cutting themselves that what they are doing is very dangerous, without a confrontation?

You can't without a confrontation. Unless you e-mal it, then you don't have to do it in person, but things like that are generally better done in person.
Good luck with it.
-Farren

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there's this guy in my school who seems to dislike me . maybe i'm just being sensitive , but sometimes he repeats what i say in a funny/mocking way .he teases everyone , but i have this feeling he doesn't like me . maybe i'm too sensitive , cuz i don't like it when people tease me or make fun of me . how should i respond to such things ? ( ps : i don't know him that well )

Well, if it really bothers you then talk to him about it. Tell him it makes you feel uncomfortable.
He may dislike you, but I knew this person and I don't know why but I felt she disliked me, but now after I've actually met her we're really good friends. You never know. The best you can do is wait until you know him better or talk to him about it now.
-Farren

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What is "emo"? I've heard so many people talk about it. Thanks!

Emo means emotional. Like, any really emotional music is emo. A guy singing about his girlfriend or something like that would be emo.

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Two of my friends just broke up over the weekend after a 8 month relationship. She dumped him and yet shes still very posessive of him. I've had a past relationships with him and I get him so ever since they broke up him and I have been talking more. But shes getting mad at me for sticking up for him when she talks crap about him and she says how I better not start liking him again which makes me think is this what friends do to each other? and Is she really being a bad ex girlfriend about the whole thing?

Yeah, she is. If you also have a relationship with him, she shouldn't expect you to end your friendship with him because she isn't with him anymore.
Oh yeah, and if you used to be with him, and she went out with him after you guys broke up, but she doesn't want you to like him now, she's being a hypocrite, and you should bring this to her attention.
Maybe she just needs a little more time though, it was 8-months.
-Farren

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well I got an email from him today... and it says this:

hi Mo,

how r u?

call me tonite if you can. ok. talk to you later.

bye

bhaskar

I sent him a letter a love letter sort of say like a few days ago.. this is what it says: Dear Bhaskar,

I'm writing this letter to explain to you how I feel. Bhaskar, I am starting to fall for you, and it is driving me crazy, because I can't seem to tell you how I really feel. I need to know where I stand in your life and if it could ever be more than what we are now. I'm starting to develop strong feelings towards you, and I don't know why. It wasn't supposed to be like this, but I got sprung! And it is you my heart's sprung on.

I love your eyes, your smile, your hair, your body, and your voice, damn that voice, it drives me off the wall. When I hear your voice my heart skips a beat. Damn, Baby boy, I am crazy about you.

I need to know how you feel about me. Could you possibly feel the same towards me, or this can never be. I just want you to be mine. I want to be able to say that you're my man. Well, now you know that I am secretly falling in love with you. I just wish I could hear those same words from you. Maybe one day, but until then I guess all I can do is wait. Please, don't make me wait too long!

But first I have to get the courage to tell you how I feel. So until then, I love you!

Love always,
Mo

What do u think he is gonna say to me on the phone.... I need to talk to u asap

Hmm...his answer is a little ambiguous. He was really short in his sentences, and it can either mean he would rather tell you on the phone that he wants to end it, or he's creating suspense so when he talks to you it will be completely unexpected when he says he loves you too.
Either way, you need a resolution, so you can go on with your life. I'll pray that it's the good one! If you ever want, you can IM me, "alias Farren" (without quotations) on aim.
Waiting can be really hard, but you'll get through it. I really hope he feels the same.
-Farren

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HI,

Here's the story. I met a guy online from some site and we met up with eachother but only once. Hes a great guy and when we met, It didnt go well but regardless of that we decided to continue with this and see where it goes in the future knowing fully well that it may end badly considering hes Bengali and his folks want a Bengali girl but he said u never know so I didnt give up hope. hes from Montreal, we started calling eachohter and talking etc.. then all of a sudden I dont hear anything from him etc. and then I contact his friend. and it continues from there.

I have been contacting his friend regarding THE GUY.. and he said that when he tried talking to him he didnt want to talk about it. I don't understand why he would act like that. I have been nothing but nice to him. Yes, I've been a bit crazy with the emails and stuff..asking him what is the status of our relationship. But that was in the past. You would think that knowing what I have done that he would be more accepting. He emailed me once and told me this: You don't need to worry about me too much. I have some family issues that I need to deal with. I will talk to u later. and after that I got no response. Those messages I sent were before he sent that message to me. I don't understand why hes got to be soo secretive that he can't even share things with me.. His friend tells me: Do you think you should hold on to him especially if hes not responding to you? I don't really know what to do.. its hard lettting go.. especially whenever I hear from his friend. I somehow subconciously beleive that there is hope when I hear from his friend.. I dunno. I think im crazy.. wat do I do? pls help

He's cleary having issues. Wether it's family or that he doesn't want to continue your relationship is unsure, but I think you should just hold off on the relationship, because you're putting a lot into it and getting nothing in return. If he wants to continue it later, but he's having problems at the moment, I'm sure he'll contact you.
You should send him an e-mail explaining your dilemma, and tell him to talk to you when he's sorted out his problems, or that if he doesn't want to be with you anymore to be honest so you can let go.
I'll pray for you hun.
-Farren

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Hi! I'm Matt and I live in chicago! I just went to the movies with a few friends and I saw this girl who I used to have been MAJORLY crushin on her. Well, she was getting me super jealous by talking bout her friends and how cool THEY were and how hot THEY were! Not girl/friends but guys! That I knew! She seems to also be ignoring me kind of. Well, we dont go to the same schools and were about the same age. How can I get her to notice me and like me? By the way I think shes soo beautiful, funny, and when she talks to me nice.

Maybe she doesn't like you, and she knows you like her, and by talking about her guy friends she's telling you to back off. It's like a secret code we girls share, and it's supposed to be easy to understand, but I don't know, guys just don't get it.
But do not fear, all hope is not lost, she could just be trying to get you jealous to see if you like her. Because she might like you, but she doesn't want to do anything if you don't like her, and by seeing if you're jealous, she's trying to find out if you like her back.
So yeah, I'll pray for you hun.
-Farren

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have you ever heard of the game '7 minutes in heaven' what is it...?

I've heard of it. When you and your friends play, two people are selected at random (girl and guy, or whatever the gender preference is), and they go into a closet or wherever and make out and stuff for 7 minutes. Then the next couple goes. It's just a game for horny adolescants....heh.
Hope I helped.
-Farren

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Sry that this is soo long!

There is this guy that i like alot! And i've hooked up wit him before but we never went out! and one of mmy best friends i was hangin out wit her and i introduced her to him and when ever i was on the phone wwit her he would ask who it was and once he grabed the phone from me and told her that she has the biggest ass he has ever seen! and a couple days ago she said that they talk on the phone every nite and he was hangin out wit her one nite when her parents were gone and she claims thatthey didnt do anything and he claimed that they did stuff that i do not need to know about! this is really pissing me off and she knows how i feel bout him and a couple days ago she told me she liked him and he liked her and that i shouldnt be jealous if they go out becaz they go together and she made me feel bad and i waz pissed and now there're goin out and i exploded when i found out caz i just really really like this guy and now shes goin out wit him and im really mad at her wat should i do????

Nothing. You can't change their feelings. Imagine if you were in her place. Besides, is it like you would marry the kid? It's not their fault they like each other. Just let what happens happen.
-Farren

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People always ask me what my name is... what should i tell them?

You should tell them what your name is. Why wouldn't you?

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I've had this crush on this girl for quite some time. It's gotten to the point where I'll buy stuff I don't really need, nor do I really want, just to talk to her. She always seems happy to see me and always gives me a big hug before I leave. The problem is I have no idea how old she is. I'm not the type of guy who judges people who date younger or older people, but it seems to worry my when I'm involved. I'm 20, what if she's only 15 or 16. She looks and kind of acts young, so I'm worried. What do you think the dating age limit should be for someone like myself?

The other problem. Earlier today, I saw scars and cuts on her rist. It doesn't look like something an accident would have caused. I know she can't really die from cuts on arm, but the scars aren't exactly good for her either. How should I go about asking her where they're from? Is it even my business to ask such a question? What if she obviously lies to me about the scars origins? Should I just drop it then or what?

Well, I think you can ask her age without sounding suspicious. I think there's nothing wrong with a 20-year-old dating a 15-year-old, partly because I'm 15, so I don't know if you should trust my opinion. You should ask her about the scars, because if you really care about her you should make sure that she isn't masochistic. If she obviously lies to you, you should make sure she knows that she can trust you, and you shouldn't go into it further than what she wants. But yeah, good luck with the girl.
I'll pray for you hun.
-Farren

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lastnight 8 of us went to my friend stephen's house and then chili's and a movie and this guy robbie that likes me invited me and so at the movie he sat next to me and put his arm around me and he told my friend that he was sure he liked me last night but then today his AIM didnt work and so he had to put up away messages for me to read bc i was like hey and i didnt know his AIM wasnt working. so then his away message was like im sorry then another was like i just feel like we have nothing in common. then he signed off. and then i was talking to my friend and she said that robbie is not good at talking with girls and now he is thinking about if he likes me or not. and then i was talking to my friend eric and i was like i dont think robbie likes me anymore. hes like he likes u. and then he was like he just isnt good at talking with girls but i talked to him about it dont worry. so now i dont know what to do like if he likes me or not/ if he doesnt he shouldnt lead me on and like put his arm around me?

After talking to him more eventually you'll know what his true feelings are. Just be normal and talk to him as usual, you'll discover wether he likes you or not. Maybe he had the AIM messages because he thought you knew he liked you, and he was afraid you might not like him so he didn't want you to think he liked you, when he really did. So yeah, just be casual and let things fall into place.
-Farren

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Well there is this guy i use to like...well he told me he liked me in all right...well noe hes goin out with this gurl jenny..an well i told him im mad at him becasuse he lied to me..but i dont want him thinkin an tellin people that im mad becasue he dont like me ...which i dont like him anymore beaces he lied too me ..an i cant talk to him an tell him becasue i freakin hate him..ugh what do i do ...help me ...I RATE GGOOODD

Ignore them and move on. It's bad for the soul to hold grudges. Just go on with life, because if you act like you were really affected people will think you're jealous and you like him and stuff. So yeah, I would move on if it were me.
-Farren

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