Although I am only 18 I have been through more than most adults have. If you have any questions about drugs, suicide, or family problems then I can help you out a lot. I've had to deal with all of that and I want to try and help people before they get as involved in it as I was. I will try to understand your situation the best that I can and give the best advice that I can. So ask me anything and I will answer you.
Gender: Female
Location: boston
Age: 18
Member Since: April 27, 2005
Answers: 110
Last Update: November 25, 2007
Visitors: 6652
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H3Y even though this question is long please don't pass it over I need help.
Im almost fourteen and my nine seventeen year old brother died about a week ago. I don't want to talk about it and my parents are trying to force me into it. I don't want to talk sometimes, I just want to forget. But theres something inside me that wont let me and thats when I get either angry or sad, but I never find myself in tears. I havn't cried since I found out he was dead. Those were tears of shock. If you were in the middle of an algerbra test and got pulled out just to be told your big brother was hit by a car you would probably cry too. I can't take this anymore. Sometimes I just want to turn him into some distant memory, and other times I want to remember him. People tell me to remember all the good times we had, but that just makes me even more sad to know that we won't ever have those times again. My parents arn't helping either. They're wanting to have another baby. They want to replace him. Plus they have allready started turning his old room into a study for my dad. MY twenty year old sister does nothing but cry and therefore gets all the sympathy. I dont ever cry so people think I dont care, but I probably care more than anybody. I know even though he's dead but not gone it still doesn't help me. I find myself always asking "What if." I can't stand "What ifs" But the one question that I have always promised I'd never ask myself is "Why me" Then I realized I shouldn't be asking why me. I wasnt the one that died. So now I am despising my sister for her constant mourning, because she's not crying for Bryson, she's crying for herself. All I need to know is that if I force myself into crying if it will make the pain go away. And if it won't how can I stop hating the world around me. Because now I'm starting to hate myself. I'm afraid to love or trust anybody again and I can't do it alone. (link)
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I know exactly what you are going through. My brother was 20 when he died. He was walking down the street and someone shot him because he was trying stop a man from raping a woman. My friend found out before I did and she told me. At first I didn't cry for weeks and then all I did was cry I even thought about suicide. It's really hard I know. You obviously loved your brother much. I'm sorry to tell you that crying won't make the pain go away nothing really will except time but crying is better than keeping what you feel inside of you. I thought keeping my feelings inside was best but even though crying doesn't take the pain you feel away it does help a little. I know that sux to hear but it's true. I'm still nervous about loving or trusting people but you have to move on. It will be extremely difficult but you have to try. Think about what your brother would want you to do. I don't know who your brother was but he must have been a good person for you to have loved him so much. Ask yourself a few questions. First would he want you to always cry for him? I don't think he would but I also don't think he would want you to be afraid of loving or trusting people again. I'm sorry to tell you that it will be very difficult, but you have to try to keep living life.
I'm very sorry for your loss and I hope that things will get better for you.
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ok my parents rele fight alot!!!wen i try to go to bed (well atleast try)there always yelling.i've tryed to break it up and talk it out but they yell more!!wat do i do??
sighned,
janice05 (link)
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Try to talk to one of them at a time when they aren't angry at each other. If your dad isn't home talk to your mom. Tell her that they're fighting bothers you it keeps you up at night and you want it stop. I'm sorry to say this but if the fighting continues your family may even want to discuss a divorce. Talk to each of your parents seperately tell them each how you feel and try to see how they feel about. Then after that try to get all of you to talk together and discuss very calmly what's going on and how they feel.
I hope things improve for you...good luck
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Hey im 14 and i have this friend. She has been my best friend for like 5 years. This year i dont kno why she is acting really different and i dont know why. She is always acting really immature and not her normal self. I can act immature at my times but she just dosent know the limit. Then some of the things she says and does are just really weird. I want to tell her what i think but she is one of thoses people that take things really personally and i dont want her to get mad at me because i still want to be her friend. plezzz help me! (link)
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You should talk to her. You don't want to be embarassed by her immature behavior. If you're worried about her getting mad at you then just try to talk to her without making it sound like you're mad at her for it so that it doesn't seem so much like your attacking her for her behavior. Very calmly explain to her that you think she's been acting really wierd and that it is bothering you. Talk it out with her and show her that you're not trying to be mean about it you just want it to stop.
good luck
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there was this boy, who was a really good friend of mine. and then, one day he told me that he hated me and that he always hated me and that i was annoying and him and i were really tite. today is his birthday, and i called him to tell him happy birthday, b/c i am the GOOD person in this friendship, and he was pretty mean! what should i do??? why duz he hate me so much??? should i tell him something? (link)
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You really can't do anything. If he wants to be that way then that's how he's going to be. You don't need someone to be being mean to you. Just try and forget about him. It will probably be hard because you two were tite but he's beeing and a$$ and you don't need that. Hang out with your other friends and forget about him.
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Today, my family and I (14/m) were out playing sports. All was well for a while. Untill my lil brother started to misbehave and be uncooperative.I got vexxed, but i controlled my rage untill we got home.
At home, i was still vexxed.
(since my birthday is about a montn away)My mom asked me what i wanted for my birthday. I told her "i want my brother to be gone for my birthday. that would be the perfect gift."
She got vexx at me. so vexx she couldn't speak. Sheleft the room.
I went to look for her later and i found her crying. what i said really got to her emotionally. she just looked at me like everything was lost.
that look got to me. i am sorry i told her that.
but i dont know what to do.
What should i do?
i can't let her feel like she grew me up wrong- i am her 1st born. she will just give up with the others too.
please help.
(link)
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You just need to apologize to her. Explain that you were angry and that you were just speaking with your anger. Apologize to her and show her that you're sorry. When you get angry with your brother try to calm yourself down and not let it build up to where you say things that you regret after. Try writing when you're angry or finding someway to let your anger out without yelling at your lil brother or without saying things like that to your mom. I'm sure that if you apologize your mom will understand and forgive you.
I hope I helped and good luck
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Hello, I have recieved several threatening letters over the past year from my father. The threats include having me put in hospital, also stating that he has had a curse put on my daughter and myself to ensure that something bad happens to us, and general insults and abuse aimed at my wife daughter and myself. We have really had enough of this, is there anything I can do and should I go to the police ? I am convinced that he is going to pay someone to come and do physical harm to my family or myself. He is quite old and in a poor state of health, but is and has always been a very brutal person having caused misery and suffering over many years mainly to his wife and children. All I have done to promt these letters is to write to him listing his bad deeds over the years and telling him what I thaught of his behaviour, this was without any aimed insults from me. My letter to him was in response to further bad behavior on his part.
Yours and Best Regards
Daniel (link)
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Yes, you should go to the police. If you feel like your wife and daughter are in danger then you deffinately need to go the police. If you really feel like he will follow up on what he is telling you in his letters then you need to call the police and make sure that your family is safe.
good luck
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ok well my dad is an alcholic and he drinks like every night and like a month ago he got pulled over for drunk driving he is in jail now and gets out in a few monthes! but before he went in he would always hit me and my family (not my mom tho)!! it gets me upset and dont no what to do!! and he only hits us when he isnt drunk so its either hes drunk or really mean does ne one no n e thing i can do w/o my mom knowing cuz she would freak if she found out that i tell ppl!! ~kel (link)
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I know what you're going through. When I lived with my father he used to be drunk all the time and he would constantly hit me. My mom wanted to keep it all a big secret but eventually I realized that isn't a good thing. If your father is hitting you then it needs to stop you need to get some help. He has no right to hit you. If he doesn't hit your mom then she probably doesn't fully understand what you're going through. The first thing you should do is talk to her and tell her how you feel about your dad. If you don't get him to stop hitting you then it could get really serious and you could end up in the hospital. My little sister died because my dad hit her too much and too hard. You don't want that to happen to you. If your mom won't do anything about it and he keeps hitting you then you need to tell someone whether it be a school counselor, an adult that you trust or even the police it's dangerous for him to keep acting this way and you need to get out of that situation as soon as possible.
I hope that I helped you and good luck
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i have a bunch of friends and all. we hang out together a lot, but there is one problem. whenever i'm in a group situation, i always am the one left out - i guess you could call me the odd man out. i think my friends take me for granted, knowing that i'll always be there for them whenever they need help or whatnot, and that's the only time i feel like they care about me, when they have a problem they need help with. is there any way i could get my friends to realize that they're treating me like crap without actually saying it to them or acting really rude or whiny? thanks so much. i rate :D (link)
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I know how you feel sometimes when I'm with my friends and at first I didn't know what to do so I just acted like it didn't bother me. Then I tried to show them that I wasn't happy with it by being quieter and not saying as much. They started to ask me what was wrong and I just explained how I felt. They said that they didn't mean to make me feel that way and it changed. The best thing you can do is let them know how you feel. They're your friends I'm sure that they'll listen to you and try to make you feel less left out.
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i play basketball and i was the third leading scorer last year on my team. number one rebounder and number one all around defensive player. but my dilema is i really want to play golf which means i cant play bbal couse htye over lap. i cant make a decision. (link)
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If you want to play golf then play golf for a year and see how you like it. If you decide that you like bball better then go back to that after you've tried a year of golf. You could find out that you enjoy playing golf more than playing bball, but if you don't try it then you'll never know.
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I'm going to be applying for a job soon, and on my resume..do I put on there that I do a lot of community service hours or does that not matter? (link)
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Yes, you should put it on there. It will make you look more responsible and it will also show that you are willing to work. It will probably help you in getting a job.
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