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My name is Elly and I am 18 years old. I live in Michigan and I graduated High School in '07. I'm currently attending a great college, but I'm home for the summer. It's too nice outside to sit on the computer all day, so I might not be as active on here as I would like.I guess a good way to describe me is experienced. I've discovered a lot about life and I can't wait to discover more... while having fun at the same time of course! ...BUT, like everyone, I have experienced things in life that I rather wish I hadn't. And I also feel that those bad experiences qualify me to help others with this column.
I have been in a serious relationship for over two and a half years now. I personally know that love is a difficult thing to nurture. It takes a lot of work. Life is NOT a fairytale where two people can simply love each other and everything will just fall into place. It doesn't work like that in the real world.
People on Advicenators are starting to disappoint me. Everyone says "ooh I want to help! I've experienced EVERYTHING!" Yet, I can't tell you how many questions I see with answers like "you could have googled that" or "we're not going to do your homework" or "I'm so sick of 'wow does he like me?!' questions." I used to sort of be like that, but now I realize how hypocritical that is. If I know the answer to a question, I will answer to the best of my ability without making you feel stupid for asking it in the first place. Advicenators is going to turn into a pretty nasty place if people just keep brushing off questions like that.
Rate or don't rate. I really don't care. But don't give me a 1 just because I tell you something you don't want to hear. Go to your mom for advice if you want sugarcoated answers.
I can give excellent advice on:
relationships/sex
friendship
family issues
anything about animals (i worked at a vet for several years)
college
advice
hey there. id really like to lose 20 pounds.. i know i have to eat very little and only good stuff but is there any kind of execrises that will help? also are there any that will make my butt more firmer.. because im short and i have a small frame but since im shorter im a lil chubby.. but i have D sized cups? will they stay that big because of my body size?
thanks
About your breast size, it is common for girls' breasts to become a little smaller after losing weight, but it shouldn't be anything to drastic.
Good exercises would be running/jogging and sit-ups. You don't exactly have to eat very little, perhaps you could just cut a few bad things out of your everyday eating routine. About four weeks ago, I stopped eating french fries and drinking regular pop and I've already lost ten pounds. It really helps to do the little things like that.
Good luck with losing weight!
I was wondering if anybody knew how to do that hump thing like the girls that pull there bangs or whatever back and then make it into that little hump thing.
Thanks in advance.
There are several ways to do it and it can be done with bangs or hair that is all one length.
The way I like to do it is I take the section of hair that is about two inches wide and is right in the middle of my forehead. I keep it separate that section from the rest of my hair by putting the rest in a ponytail. Then, I take the front section, straighten it, and then comb it so I'm holding it straight up on my head. then I take a comb and rat it. If you don't know what that means, basically you stick the comb in the section of hair and move it up and down so the hair gets bunched up. WITHOUT brushing out the bunches, I clip the excess the the top of my head and there's "the little hump thing."
If you need me to explain that more just let me know. :-)
um how do i give my sim a cell phone? i have sims 2 deluxe which has the normal sims and nightlife
You have to make the sims go to a community lot that has the electronic vending machine thingy. It's yellow and blue and when you click on it, it offers the option to buy a cell phone, an mp3 player, or a game device.
Sometimes the stores that come with the original game don't have the vending machine, so you could go into build mode and edit the community lot of your choice and put in a vending machine yourself.
Hope that helped!
So basically, I have had a big history of dyeing my hair. Lots of dyeing and some bleaching. I've bleached streaks in my hair in January and got over it, dyed my whole hair black to cover up the mess. About 4-5 months later, of course.. once you go black, you usually don't go back.. easily. It faded but since I'm a natural dark brown.. not so much. So I couldn't wait and thought since it faded from a blue black.. that a brown would take it. Uh, no. I knew it wouldn't but I just tried anyway.
I have had noticeable brown roots for about 2 or maybe 3 months now. 3 inches or so of brown above black. Then, I have my natural roots coming in too.
How can I fix this on my own? No professional because I'm not made of money. No dish soap cap, because it won't work.
Which is less damaging: Trying to remove the black or the brown roots?
Black is harsh on me so I want it to go.
I was told to put color stripper on it but does that work? Is that .. basically bleach? What color would my hair come out because I've dyed it like red, orange, blonde, green, blue, redbrown, a golden brown.. and I just want less of a mess to clean up!
HELP? remember, no professional. I know they could do a better job than me, but like I said. No money for that. It's really expensive in my area. I've like to get rid of this mess so I can treat my hair & wait to get a perm. Thanks.
Go and get a semi permanent hair color that is between dark brown and black. It will cover your roots nicely and blend with the rest of your hair. I suggest using the "natural insticts" semi permanent hair color because it doesn't have any ammonia and it is actually healthy for your hair. It will wash out gradually over 28 shampoos, but even though it is semi permanent, it will still leave your hair darker than it was before.
Then just keep applying the semi permanent color until the black is grown out of your hair. Hope that helps!
WEll ok my best friend is a girl and we have been through alot together and i really love her and dont want anything to happen to her and ill make sure that nothing does however, theres a problem she likes to get around and have fun with guys and it hurts/ pisses me off...by the way i dont like her more than a friends...she gives them head,let them finger her, and fucks them and im afraid one time somethings going to go wrong and she going to get pregnant...i want to convice her she dont need it but she just laughs at me and goes and does it anyway such as right now shes fucking a friend of mine in my basement...i dont no what to do...i want to tell her how i feel and also get her to stop!! Anythign in helpful! Thanks
Your heart is in the right place, but there's not much you can do except tell her your concerns. I agree that it is a great idea to write her a letter to explain everything you're feeling.
Point out to her that she is a beautiful girl and a wonderful person. Tell her she deserves someone that will respect her and not just use her for sex. Go ahead and tell her that she's probably going to end up pregnant. Tell her she is too good of a person to go around and just let people have their way with her.
Once you tell her how you feel, let it go. If she doesn't believe you, then she's obviously just going to do what she wants anyway. I don't know if you would up for doing this, but maybe you could tell her parents what she has been doing and tell them how worried you are. Maybe they could at least get her birth control or something. My best friend did the same exact thing awhile back and I got so frustrated and I told her parents and they stopped her from doing it anymore. Yes, she got pissed when I told her it was me, but she learned to forgive me. It's the true friend that tells someone. Keeping silent will only hurt your friend.
It's up to you, but I hope you can convince her to change.
Help im a loser! ok you see im a sophmore and i want to become popular, but im very shy so it makes it hard for me to make friends. last year we moved to this small town and during that summer i hung out with this popular chic, who i didnt know was popular at the time, but she had to get a surgery so she missed the first few weeks of skool. on the first day i was soooo nervous about who to sit with that i just sat down with the first person i reconized from church. her and her friends welcomed me with open arms, eventually they became my friends too but they were losers... and i mean the kind that even the regular losers pick on!when my popular friend from the summer came to skool and saw that i hung out with them she ditched me,later on in the year this girl alice started talkin to me adn we soon became friends she introduced me to her friends so i decided to desert my other friends to join alice's group of friends.they were all band nerds so it was a step up from the ppl i used to hang out with. i talked to alice and her friends at lunch, in class, after skool, and i had a blast. but i didnt know any one else besdes alice and her friends, i was spending every moment of my time with them and no one else.well i did talk to this one popular chic for a time cauze none of my other friends were in that class we became friends too but only in that class period cauze she said she wouldnt hang with me in public cauze i hung out with the band nerds. she was the one popular chic who hung out with me even when i was hangin with the band nerds. but this year she moved to another skool so now i have no popular friends what so ever, so im completly alone well except for alice and her frineds. i hardly know any one else in school well except for a couple of geeky guys i play cards with sometimes. it's only been the first week of skool so i still have time to get more friends before ne one remembers who i used to hang out with. is there ne way i can get noticed and befriended by the popular people and become popular my self?
Do you have any idea whatsoever how ridiculous and immature you sound right now?
You should not want to make friends for the sake of being considered "popular." It sounds to me like you want to be part of the so-called "in" crowd just so people will think you're cool. I guarantee you right now that the friends in that "popular" crowd of which you speak will be nothing but back-stabbing and mean. Look at how that first girl you met ditched you for such a stupid reason? What about the girl that refuses to hang out with you because you were seen with band nerds? You think THEY are good friends?
Right about now, it sounds to me like you would fit in perfectly with that crowd seeing as you ditched perfectly nice people who accepted you into their group because you were alone and did not know anyone. Who do you think you are? You might think someone is a nerd because they are in band, but at least they are doing something better with their time than judging people they don't even know. You have no right to call someone a geek ESPECIALLY after they were so nice to you.
You need friends that are going to be there for you, give you good advice, and share laughs with you. Those are the qualities you should be looking for when you are trying to meet new people.
Grow up.
In the real world, no one gives a crap if you are "popular." It's time to be mature and accept people for who they are and not what "crowd" they are in.
If you are kind to everyone, smile at people, and stop making judgments, you will make a TON of great friends that will last you all through high school. That should be what matters. If you don't, everyone will end up hating you in the end.
can i send my college application first then my SAT score? how does that work? i didnt send my SAT score to any colleges the first time i took them in May but im taking them again in Nov 3 this year and im not doing any early decision so just rolling admissions. i know theres more competition near the end of the deadline for schools and less early on in summer.. so what should i do?
Go ahead and send in your application now and when it asks for your SAT score, put in an N/A. When you do take your test in November, have them send the scores to all the schools you previously applied to. If the college contacts you beforehand and asks for an SAT score, let them know that you will be taking it soon and you will have the score sent.
in about september 06-march 07 i was with this kid i REALLY liked a lot. he broke up with me in march because i did a lot of bad shit to him which i totaly regret. i cried over him almost everynight.. and i knew that we would never get back together ever again. my ex really did hate me and i knew it. i still liked him a lot up until about julyish..then i started to like this other guy [but i still had my ex in the back of my mind] i went on vacation and when i got back the guy who i liked asked me out and we are now going out..however i kept having dreams about my ex and i wanted to talk to him to just have closure. i had a gut feeling he still had feelings for me but no one would believe me..i decided to text my ex who i hadnt talked to since march. [ we had a few hey,hey,whats up, nm u, nm conversations every now and then but not a real one] i said to him can i tell you something and he said yes and i said okay well ive definately changed a lot since we were together..and i just want to let you know that becuase i pretty much want to apologize for anything stupid i've done and i hope we can be cool now yada yada..and hes said yeah i really disliked you for a while but its cool now but i like realllyy did like you thoguh before all that shit happened.and i said yeah same i realllllyy did like you a lot..and after i did too for a while but its all good..and he said whats a while and i said welll i liked you a few months after we were officially done and then i just had a thing for you. and he said realllyy reallly did you really like me blah blah and i said yeah.. you have no idea.. and then suddenly he goes so i hear your going out with [my bf now] and i know he was considering going back out with me but then he remembered i had a bf. i said yeah and he said thats cool im talking to him now and i said cool and he said yeah. its friggen awesome..and he startyed to act all moody. i had a feeling it was becuase i did actually have a boyfreind now and he did still have feelings for me.. sorry this is so long im almost done :]]] haha bottom line..i still really love my ex and i woke up this morning thinking about my ex and not my bf..i like my bf but i love my ex. i know if i break up with my bf my ex will go back out with me. but my bf is a reallllllyyy great guy who doesnt deserve that. please help me i realllyyy have no idea what to do. i need serious help becuase my friends dont know what to say either. thank you so much xoxo
Here's what I think you should do. It might sound childish, but I do this type of stuff all the time and it always helps me. I want you to make two columns on a piece of paper. At the top of one column, put your ex's name, and at the top of the second column, put your boyfriend's name. Then, I want you to right down as many good things about them in their columns as you can. Write only things like "helps me with homework" or "gets along with my friends." Stuff like "he's so hot" doesn't count, because you obviously see that already in both of them. Basically write down all the nice things they do for you and/or why you think they would be good boyfriends.
Now, which list has more? Who would make you more happy? The point of the columns is to truly find out who is the better guy for you based on how they are as a person. Whoever you think would treat you the best, respect you, and make you feel special is the one you want to be with.
In the end, if you decide your current boyfriend is that guy, just tell your ex you would like to stay friends because, like you said, you've changed a lot since you've been together and your new boyfriend is just the thing you need right now.
If you end up wanting your ex back, explain to your boyfriend how you feel and hope that you two can remain friends. Tell him he deserves to be with someone who will truly feel the same way about him and you don't want him to end up getting hurt because you like someone else more. If he is the great guy you say he is, he will understand.
Good luck and I hope things turn out okay!
me & my cousins went shopping yesterday from about 4:30-8. my neck started to hurt and i really don't know why because it never happened to me. so i thought, maybe if i get some sleep it'll feel better. i slept over my cousins house and we went to bed at like 4 and i just woke up at 7:23 because i can't sleep, and it's still hurting. should i just leave it or is it something serious? thanks
Chances are you just twisted your head the wrong way or you have some sort of kink in your neck. You may have just slept on it wrong. It happens to people all the time. Try taking some Aleve or IBP to help the pain and maybe put a heating pad on your neck where it is hurt. That might help soothe the muscle and you'll be able to relax.
I don't think it is anything serious, but if it persists for more than two days, consult a doctor.
What's EXACTLY dry humping and why does it feel good? Can it give you or your boyfriend an orgasm?
Thanks :) xo
Dry humping basically is when two people rub up against each other in sexual positions, but with their clothes on.
Sometimes it feels good because it can stimulate you down there, but after awhile it does get old and, well I think, boring.
I highly doubt girls can reach orgasm from dry humping because it is nearly impossible to stimulate their clitoris through layers of clothing. Guys, on the other hand, could very easily reach orgasm.
Ima junior and im still not sure what i want to do in life. Is that weird? I dont exactally have a love or desire to do anything, nor have i put much thought into it. I dont know if im gonna go to college, is that bad? What am i gonna do after high school? I know its all up to me but im totaly clueless. My parents dont encourage me to go to college and it kind of puts me down. It makes me feel like they know i cant do it or something. advice please!
You are not alone in your indecisiveness. I know college Juniors that have no idea what they want to be in life. There are lots of jobs you can get without going to college. For right now, focus on getting good grades and enjoying your high school years. Once you graduate, if you still don't feel up for college, take a year to just work and see how you feel after that.
You are still very young and you have a lot of options to choose from. Nobody said that in order to get a good career you had to attend college right away.
Your parents are probably just trying not to pressure you. I'm sure they mean well by their actions because they just want you to be able to make this decision for yourself. I wouldn't worry about that too much.
is there a site where they have a list of college and universities and what courses it offers and such?? i'm only a freshman right now, but i wanna start looking at colleges so i'll have a long time to decide. thanks.
fastweb.com
collegeboard.com
The two web sites that got me scholarships and helpful college information, right down to what to pack for the dorm!
okay so this is a really random strange question but im just wondering.
i went to the beach this summer and one night me and my friend were walking on the beach and some guys called us over so we started talking and stuff. there was a 19 year old guy that just started wanting me to do stuff with him and as bad as it is i let him finger me. is it illegal that he was 19 and im 15? just wondering..?
Since he is over 18, a legal adult, and you are under 18, a minor, it was, in fact, illegal. Even if you gave him your consent, it is still illegal. The only way it wouldn't be illegal is if the two of you had your parent/guardian's consent. That is the truth.
As long as you didn't have a problem with it, I don't think either of you will get in any trouble though. Just be careful next time.
another "guy question"... but I need some help. There's this guy. Now, this guy is kind of a redneck. He hunts, fishes, talks about trucks, ect. (sorry if i'm stereotyping). well, he likes me. He has liked me for the past two years, and I am beginning to like him. the thing is, EVERYONE in my school makes fun of him because he is, well, "immature". I've tried to hint to him that I'd like him more if he was more mature but he just doesn't get it. I'm afraid if he asks me out, I won't know what to say. I mean I like him, but he can be annoying. I know you're gonna say "follow your heart" but it really, truly isn't that easy. Please help!
What other people think or do to him should not be a concern of yours. The first step is deciding whether or not you like him regardless of what other people are saying.
How well do you know this boy? There is a chance that he is only immature at school or around his friends. It is quite possible that he can be mature when he is one-on-one with someone or when he doesn't have to make an impression. Sometimes guys act immature because they are nervous, shy, or simply don't know what to say. Take the time to get to know him better and I'm sure you'll see he can have his mature moments too.
I think it would be wise to be friends with this boy before you consider dating him. Start things off casual, see how you feel, and then I'm sure you'll easily be able to decide if you want to take your relationship with him further.
15/f
ok i'm starting school tomorrow, and now im like freaking out. i dont wanna go. im too scared. like we dont have buses because our levie failed. so im going with a friend. so thats good. for like the beginning. and then i know my way around the school kinda, so im not too worried about geting lost. WHAT IM FREAKING OUT ABOUT THOUGH. is lunch. like all my friends last names are in the beginining of the alphabet, what if i dont have anyone. and i went to a private school. so i dont really know any of the public kids. what do i do? what if i dont know anyone? what if im aloneee. and we have such a big school.
how was it for your first day as a freshman? what did you do at lunchtime? are alot of kids felt/feeling the same way i do?
ahh pleasee help. anytihng well help.
Relax. By this time next week you're going to look back on this and laugh.
You're going to meet a LOT of new people. In your first few classes before lunch, make sure to introduce yourself to at least one person in each class. Casually strike up a conversation and tell them where you used to go to school, what other classes you're taking, and ask something about them. Then you can ask what lunch they have. If they have the same one, you already have someone you can sit with. If not, you can meet people in your other classes and find someone to sit with.
When I was a freshman, I was stuck in the same boat as you. All my friends had a different lunch. I would scan the lunchroom for someone else that was sitting alone or for a table that had less than five people sitting together. Then I'd just ask politely if I could join them. I was able to meet new people that way and keep my options open.
If you do the same thing, I'm certain you will have no problem finding someone to sit with. All you have to do is be friendly and polite and you can sit with whoever you want.
Good luck!
i know none of you are doctors, but i was wondering if someone has ever had this. yesterday i had the WORST headache ever. sortly after that i started throwing up. i could not sleep. one second i was hot and the next i was freezing. i didn't get to sleep until 11 this morning and only slept for two hours. anyone have any ideas?
It sounds to me like you had a migraine. I get them all the time and experience those exact same symptoms. As long as the symptoms go away within 12 hours or so, you should be fine. If they persist, see a doctor ASAP.
Anyone know how to get skinner/thinner thighs ?
Running is a great exercise for your legs. Eating healthy won't hurt either. If you can't run, maybe invest in a Gazelle and that will have less impact and will still help you lose some fat.
Hey this isn't very serious but for iTunes I don't want to go crazy buying songs but I know alot of songs I would like to get. I am trying to limit myself to about 7 songs a week so I don't spend alot. Tell me what you think I should do. Thanks. (Songs cost $1 each)
I think it's wonderful that you want to do the LEGAL thing and buy your songs! People forget that downloading music from places like Limewire is against the law.
If songs cost a dollar, maybe you could set aside $7 each week and buy one song a day like you said. As long as you have some sort of cash intake, you shouldn't lose too much money. If you find that you are going broke, maybe lower it to $5 a week.
Hi My problem is well I have been bfs with this friend lets call her jo for almost five years now and I have always been there for her and she for me but you see she turned 18 a few months back and I dont turn until two weeks and well I new she would get new friends and yes I am a little jealous I supppose but its not unfounded you see she recently made this new friend lets say amy and well she doesnt have time for me now. we used to phone each other every night and now when she tells me to phone shes never there shes out with amy. It at first didnt bother me but now it pisses me off cause we made a deal that we would never let someone come between us and that wed always be there for each other.
Also any time we spend time together as I say a rareity in itself shes always txtin or phonin this person and not payin any attention to the fact that shes supposed to be with me.
I guess what im sayin is that I think Im loseing the one person I have ever trusted and Its killin me and I cant tell her cause then ahll lose her anyway and that will kill me once and for all.
Another thing that really bugged me was she asked me if I wanted to go clubbing with her and when I said yes as its the week after my bday she said that I could "TAG ALONG" with her and amy.
I really need help cause this is really gettin me down and soz its so long.
lxx
please help!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Turning 18 opens up a lot of possibilities and freedoms, as I'm sure you will experience soon enough. Have you thought that perhaps Jo just got caught up in all that freedom that she didn't realize how neglected she made you feel?
My advice is to talk with her about this. I promise it won't kill you. If she is as good of a friend as you say, she will hear you out and most likely try to be a little different from now on. Communication is really the only option you have at this point. What's a friendship without communication after all?
Once you turn 18 and are able to go clubbing and all that other fun stuff, I'm sure you'll realize it was just an honest mistake. I think it would be a great idea for you to give Jo's new friend Amy a chance. Who knows, maybe she'll make a great new friend for you as well and the three of you can have fun together.
I understand your hurt, for I have been through those things myself. But, honestly, more than half the time the person does not even realize they are doing it. If they are a good friend, they will hear you out and things will get better between you two. If she won't hear you out and thinks you are overreacting, then maybe she was never that great of a friend to begin with.
Basically, tell her how you feel, ask to be included, and get out there and meet new people and fun right along with Jo instead of hanging back and getting upset.
any tips for starting a new school year? like a resolution so theres no drama through out the school year im going to 8th grade /... now what do i do to make more friends not cry all the time and stop being alone... and anythin... like personality? be louder.. or what??
what does humble mean in a person? dop people like it? or theyd like loud and wild better?
thnks
B-E Y-O-U-R-S-E-L-F!
I cannot stress that enough! If you don't act like yourself, people will only like you for something you're not.
If you want to make friends, walk around with your head up, make eye contact, and smile at people. That's called friendliness. People like that. :]
Next, you could try joining a club or sport. Something that interests you. You'll make lots of new friends this way and by being in the same club/sport as them, you'll already have something in common with them.
When someone is "humble," they are respectful towards others and don't judge them without first getting to know them. That is an important quality to have if you want to prevent drama. Don't judge people you don't even know. Don't make comments about what someone is wearing or what their hair looks like. Be friendly and kind to EVERYONE no matter what, even if they are complete morons. You'll be the better person for it and even if they are mean to you, the fact that you were nice to them will really set off a good, positive vibe around you, thus attracting people to you.
If you want to be wild and loud, then be loud and wild. If that's not normally your style, then don't. It's that simple.
In short, do what makes you happy, be kind to everyone around you, and get involved in activities at your school. I'm positive that if you do those things, this will be the best year of school for you yet.
;-]