I aim to give you solid advice on your problems. I don't sugarcoat things and I'm always straight up. Don't come asking for what you want to hear as I always give the truth even if you don't want it because it's what you need and the only way to grow.
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Member Since: December 31, 2006
Answers: 3591
Last Update: August 30, 2022
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In the beginning of April, my friend dropped me out of nowhere with no explanation. Within the first few days, I noticed something was up so I texted him about it and he didn’t respond. Soon enough he started to cut me off from almost all of his social media. I still saw him interacting with the other people in my friend group so I knew that he only had a problem with me. This bothered me a lot because, even though I didn’t know why he cut me off, I knew I hurt him and I felt so guilty for making him feel this way. Eventually weeks went by and I began to lose hope that we were gonna talk again. My 18th birthday was coming up and I was hoping to hear from him. But to my own mistake, I got my hopes up and he ended up not telling me anything at all that day either. That day hit really hard for me. It became clear to me that he seriously doesn’t want anything to do with me anymore and this hurt me so much. I spent that night deleting practically every photo with him on my phone and I stood up until 4 am crying because I didn’t want to believe it was all over. This was a friendship that matter so much to me and held close to my heart. I just couldn’t believe that someone I cared about so much had dropped me so quickly. I still have no idea why exact he did this. The only reason I can come up with was me asking him about a previous fall-out we’ve had and how he felt during that time, but honestly I really don’t know. I don’t wanna be the one that texts him because that’s only gonna contribute more to the possible stress I gave him. And because of this, I can’t help but think that I’m a toxic friend in this situation even after how much this hurt me. We’re still not talking and I have no idea what I should at this point. I wish I can just let this go but I can’t. What should I do? (link)
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I highly doubt that you are this toxic friend you have made yourself out to be. In life friends will come and go including ones we had a huge bond with. Sometimes when people want to move on they have an inability to tell the other person and end up just dropping them and leaving them to figure it out. That's not a nice way of doing things but it means he doesn't want it to be awkward and doesn't want a messy confrontation.
As hard as it may be move on and find people you gel with. Join student council, the drama club or something where you can meet other people. This is just 1 person. It's not nice how this ended but you deserve to find better people and you will. I wouldn't spend another minute crying over this as it's not worth the tears. It hurts to be treated this way and how he didn't value friendship. It says a ton about who he is.
It's too bad he can't communicate how he feels. I also know that it likely wasn't something you said or did unless you did something offensive which by all accounts you didn't.
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Like the question states, I can't get my mom to back off. I still live and home and will probably be here until I graduate college (2 yrs) because of Covid-19. My mom always wants me to do stuff for her. Because I'm the most capable person in my home (lazy brother and equally lazy, freeloading cousins), I feel like she exploits me. She's wearing me out. I don't have a waking moment where this woman just lets me live. If you don't willingly do what she wants, she subtly makes you feel bad. I helped my brother with his schoolwork since the pandemic on top of my workload, I do chores, I help her out, but that's not enough for her. I could go on and on here. It's so bad, that I'm reluctantly trying to get into med school or anything else post-grad just to get out of this city and away from her, loans be damned. No one understands that I run out of energy and fatigue easily, even as a 20 y/o. I do a lot in my home, and I deserve to be left alone. She's annoying and this pandemic is no help either. What can I do? Am I just overreacting here? Thanks. (link)
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Did you ever think that you are annoying to her? It's not all about you here. Be careful with how you treat her now because one day when she's gone you'll be missing her and her quirks. I think she relies heavily in you because you are dependable and older than your siblings whom she can't get to do anything. As far as going to another city or school you don't care for to get away from her that's stupid. Your problems will follow you wherever you go until addressed. You may find you need her more than you thought.
All you have to do is point out to her that your siblings aren't pulling their weight or helping at all. Tell her that you feel a ton of burden and as if you're doing too much at once. Make a schedule so you can juggle your activities and what she needs help with. Encourage her to motivate your siblings to grow up a bit and take some responsibility for themselves.
Covid-19 is a bitch to be sure and leads people to become more dependent and or irrate at times with one another or to magnify their frustration. Just remember nobody wants to be stuck in the house alone or with anyone else for this long and that factor influences a lot of things.
Youmay think you deserve to be alone all the time but think about how she feels. Odds are it's the same way. I think if you see things through her eyes that you'll be able to work through this and compromise.
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Where do I begin. I have been single since I was 21 (I am now 29). There has been no prospects and not for the lack of trying. My life feels empty.
It started valentines day. Usually I am sad. This year.. there was no feelings. Nothing. Empty. Dark.
Today I realized how I have lost hope.. in love, in ever having a family. My life feels empty and I feel like I don't have anything to look forward too.
My therapist says she doesn't think that my story is over, and that I will find someone, she has hope for me. I just don't know how to see that hope for myself. I have been crying for 8 hours on and off. I don't want to end life..and never would but I don't know how to live like this when all is hopeless.
No love life.. and often home alone. Friends are all busy living their lives or enjoying their family. I've talked to friends before.. this will get better. You will find someone. It just takes time they say.
It's been years of waiting. I also don't want to worry my parents by talking to them. I feel nothing can be don't to make this better. I don't know how to be okay. And that scares me. What if I'm never okay again.
Any advice welcome (link)
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The therapist means well but what you may need is a psychiatrist. You're not crazy but she's missing the fact that you have been having really dark, empty, depressed thoughts for a long time with a little bit of brightness as well. That's a mental health issue and could be a variety of things including depression or bipolar disorder as examples. That's something that a therapist doesn't have the training to see and or treat with medication.
If you feel you have lost hope in damn near everything and that your life is over and are crying non-stop for hours ditch the therapist. See your family doctor pronto (which may be harder to do with Covid-19) or if you feel you can't function visit an emergency room and get asessed by on call doctors. That will put you in the system and get you helped.
If you have felt this way for years and your mental health has never been addressed or something suspected by a therapist or doctor it's time to investigate this further and consult these people. You have nothing to lose and may find your world gets a hell of a lot brighter quickly.
You have a story to tell even if you don't know the words to yours yet or your place. It will become known eventually. You matter to this world, your family and others. You're important and are worthy and capable of love and experiencing it. You will be okay provided you seek help. Things could radically change in your life for the better.
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Hello,
I am from USA I am a girl and I am 18, and I have recently gotten feelings for a guy. My best friend and I are very close. My sister and her brother are even dating. My best friend has a friend who was dating the guy im into now. They were together for two years, and he ended things with her, because he didn't feel the same anymore, and things were different between them. I've been spent a lot of time with this guy before quarantine. Everyone thinks he's into me, he's a very good guy and we talk a lot over the phone as well. I like him but I don't know if I should make a move or not. If it would cause problems. My sister dislikes him, but she doesn't know him very well. My best friends brother loves him and thinks he's a really good guy. What should I do? (link)
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It's really not about what others think of him. It's about your perception of him and what you need out of a partner. They can't make that choice for you. You have to know in your gut if something feels right. If your brain keeps telling you it's time to go for it than do so if you feel it will have a good result. The only time I would listen to other people is if enough of them have told you to stay clear for a certain reason. That's something always to consider because odds are they're trying to save you from a bad experience.
If you like this guy just be honest and direct and see what happens. The worst that can happen is a "NO" or a "let's be friends" At least you will know the answer rather than having it nag at you incessently.
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Hello, my high school does a thing where a student can direct a play in the Spring, and I would like to do it next year. Problem is, I don't have an idea for a play and would like some help.
Ideally, this is a drama with only acting and nothing else. We do have some singers so a 'play with music' is fine, but not ideal.
Obviously, I can't completely predict who is and isn't going to audition, but if we go by this year the program has roughly an even amount of boys and girls, a lot of Freshmen and Sophomores joined this year and we have some strong actors. The girls tend to be more 'drama' actors, whereas the boys are comedic and goofy. We have 21 people right now who aren't Seniors, so that is an estimate.
Some good people;
-a boy who is primarily comedic, can (and wants to) pull off 'serious' acting with more work
-a boy who usually plays very eccentric characters, he's also an edge lord
-there are these underclassmen girls who are good at drama acting, I haven't seen them do anything intense but they are able to be realistic and serious
-two more edgy boys who play eccentric characters and I can see being able to do a serious show
-we have a couple of nerdy type boys
-a girl who will be a senior next year who's actually a fantastic actress
-a sweet boy who plays similar characters, usually a romantic interest
-this one girl who's a great comedic and pretty neurotic
-a 'mother' type actress, I've seen her do dramatic monologues before that were good
Any play ideas? (link)
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It's been 20 years since I first saw someone direct a show called Shakespeare's Lovers. I don't know if it was an original concept or not but it was done with a youth groups and different ages and genders. What it was is a 2 act show with what they felt were the best scenes involving love and lovers that the bard wrote. They would act them out and they didn't have to be from the same play or in any kind of real order. They did however, have to tie back at the end to something they as a cast wanted to say about the subject. It was an exploration of that. This was done in a park in a little amphitheater at night with few lights, sound and a couple of oil drums with fire in them. That's one idea.
You could take that theme and do your own thing by finding a series of scenes on a subject that they really care about and start pulling monologues and scenes from other shows they can create and link together.
A better idea would be to do that but have them write their own script with you of original material that may not link to each scene before or after it but by the end of the show will connect to a theme or statement they want to make. Give it a whirl.
It's the same thing with comedy have them write what is funny to them in a series of sketches and then start blocking a show and refining scenes and give them total ownership over the performance.
You could have your singers write their own material and weave it into a show or come up with songs they are really good at that currently exist and weave it in to an original production you all came up with.
I also find that Alice And Wonderland is a great piece that allows for creation of a bunch of eccentric and comedic characters. If you do your own spin on that it might work. How To Eat Like A Child is another.
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Hi I don’t know so much about my desire to be under 90 lbs for the remainder of my life and I’m concerned I might be anorexic or worse and wanted to seek your advice on what could I possibly be facing. (link)
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The weight you are supposed to be and that is healthy is determined by your height. Being much lower than where you are supposed to be can be detrimental to your health. Being way over that amount and obese can lead to health conditions such as diabetes, heart disease etc.
Why do you want to be 90lbs so bad? If that's way under your natural weight than you may have a problem. If concerned about you weight once Covid-19 allows family doctors to reopen book an appointment to discuss your eating habits and desire to weigh a certain amount regardless if it's healthy or not. They will set things right and tell you what you need to be at to be healthy. If you have an eating disorder or weird thinking about your body they can get you professional help as well.
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I'm 27/f and I've read and heard that women don't think about sex or masturbate as often as men, but I think I do. I masturbate at least once daily, sometimes as much as 4 times. I fantasize often and sex is usually somewhere close in my mind's eye. I feel like my libido is in overdrive. My boyfriend has been depressed for a while and we usually only do it maybe twice a week, sometimes 3 times. Sometimes only once. But I know that's not either of our faults. I guess my question is, are there other girls like me who think they are a nympho? Sex isn't like a compulsive thing for me, though, I'm just constantly thinking about it. (link)
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You are normal. You may have a higher sex-drive than your partner and that's okay. As long as you can go through your day filling it with normal things and aren't avoiding stuff just to go masturbate it's fine if it's 3-4 times per day. Also, during Covid-19 you're going to be stressed to the breaking point at times and have pent up frustration or desires even that needs to be released. This is one way of doing that.
Fantasizing is healthy as is masturbation. Your doing it more may have a lot to do with being constantly indoors. In fact, right now a lot of people are ordering in large numbers per an article I read sex-toys from Amazon and other companies because of social distancing and unable to have partners. Masturbation is fairly common right now with both sexes especially among your age bracket and even older as the only safe sexual release. We all do it but don't admit it.
As far as your husband goes find out what is causing the depression and get him proper help if he hasn't got it already. Medication he may on may lower lobido. You're not a nympho and thining about sex and not doing any acting on what you're thinking about is okay.
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I am a 17 year old guy and I am from India. I play guitar and I sing. I post the song covers on Instagram. I get all the good comments but I am in a dilemma. I feel sometimes that I don't sing good (I have a bass in my voice). I get all the good comments about my singing but I get criticism as well. Sometimes I feel I should not stop singing but sometimes I feel that I should stop singing. The good comments I get I think are just for the sake of commenting. I am really confused. I don't know what to do. I need your advice. (link)
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People won't leave multiple comments that they enjoyed your work unless they meant it or take the time to bang out compliments if they didn't mean it. Every person on Instagram or YouTube that posts anything creative that perhaps others cannot do themselves winds up with their fair deal of inaccurate and negative comments.
It comes with the territory and usually those people don't know beans about how to create what you have and in this case probably cannot sing or play an instrument themselves. It may be jealousy too. They're armchair critics and their opinion doesn't matter worth a damn.
Deep down you know you can sing and you can play guitar. That's all that matters and don't stop. One way to know people are tuning in is to turn off comments on YouTube or Instagram and notice how many people are turning in and measure the hits and popularity this way.
Also, you're going about this wrong. Think of the videos you post as meant for an audience of ONE and that's you and for having fun and enjoying it and if someone else likes or dislikes it that's okay because you are learning and charting your own progress.
Also, don't be afraid to fail or have something you worked hard on not work out. You have to stumble ALOT on the road to getting very good at something. Once you get really good than nobody can knock your progress or work.
You could do some research about music schools or vocal coaches in your area that offer coaching on both your instrument and your voice to improve upon what you have got. During Covid-19 there are numerous people who have taken that online offering lessons that way. Give it a whirl and see what happens but above all don't quit over what a nitwit on social media may say about you.
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So basically. I just found out my father has malignant melanoma. It's a skin cancer. I have a sister and she tends to get EXTREMELY nervous for these kind of situation so I understand her feelings. She proceeds to text me today telling me she felt like crap about the situation and to top it off she was mad at me for calling her ungrateful to her child's father. They have been broken up for some time but she still seems to be attached and gets jealous every time he seems to try to move on. I have told her over and over that she is an ungrateful bitch because she truly is. The point is, she only knew about it because she went through my phone while I was sleeping. I honestly get where she is coming from but I feel like she was wrong for going through my phone. (link)
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Lock your phone first of all. Also, keep anything you wouldn't want people inadvertently reading out of conversations on there. You shouldn't be talking about family negatively on there anyway to other people. That's wrong in and of itself. What she did was wrong to go through your phone. Let her know that.
The situation between your sister and her-ex boyfriend or husband is her problem to deal with. It's not your issue nor should you butt your nose in or offer a point of view or chastise her in front of him. If you think she's ungrateful than that's fine. You voice it privately with her and certainly not in front of him. There's nothing fair or right about that. Don't do anything that you wouldn't want her to say/do to you in front of anyone.
She needs to be told that the relationship was many years ago and tough but that people move on and she must do so as well. She needs to see that the guy isn't interested and has moved on and that NOTHING will get better in her life until she does the same and admits that it's completely over. Failure to do that suggests she's narcissitic and may want to look closely at her mental health if she's unceasing and unrelentless in jealousy over a situation long over.
She needs to move on. I think you and your parents should try to get through to her but it's definetly a mental health thing if she cannot let go and see reality. She's punishing and poisoning herself not him with the behavior. She won't be physically or mentally healthy if she keeps it up.
She needs to do this and be encouraged to because she has to have a cordial relationship with the father as her child grows and involve him equally in parenting and access and see that he has moved on and she can to and that the child's relationship with both are important and his/her perception should not be clouded by any BS between her and him. And that's all it usually is BS that people can't let go of that affects the kid. She's not a victim here and has to get past that and playing that role. It takes two to start and end a relationship. It's not all about her.
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I'm not aware of anyone hear as any knowledge about dream meanings, but this one is weighing heavy on me. I have constant (like every or every other night) dreams that my sister has introduced us to a new boyfriend of hers whether my reaction in the dream to the person is good or bad, I am intrigued to know why am I dreaming this, and what does it mean I need to change or whatever? Also if anyone doesn’t know can I get referred to someone who might? (link)
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Dreams are thought pictures. When you go to bed at night your brain doesn't shut off it's still active. Whatever you are thinking about be it pleasant or extremely afraid of or doubting it's all there and manifests itself into pictures that form dreams. It's also stuff you bury subsconciously that you see as well typically but not always in nightmare format. It really isn't anything to be upset by and it's not something that is going to come true in real life.
In terms of the sister maybe you have feelings deep down about disappointing her or having a bad reaction to something she's done and what she would do. It could be that or that there is something bothering you about your relationship now and it not being as tight as it should. There is probably real life doubt about something in your relationship. Perhaps if you spoke to her about that the dreams would ease. Maybe you should tell her what you constantly dream about and once you have it can no longer affect your thinking. That's all it is your thinking or fears in pictures we call dreams. When you change your thinking or thoughts you don't get the same visions.
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I am in my 30's and the guys in my generation are an absolute joke. Throughout my whole life I have been working on myself and have the worst of luck with guys. I don't understand why I can't simply date and I REFUSE to be apart of the trashy hook-up culture. Guys have never chased me and I have always been the one going after guys. What am I doing wrong? They reject me 24/7 and I am beyond sick of trying anymore. I don't settle for less, I don't take crap from anyone at all. I'm old fashioned. I have tried online dating- which is a complete joke, virtual/speed dating- another joke and if I try to develop some kind of connection it disappears. I have been ghosted, lied to, treated like crap on so many accounts or treated like an option. THEY DO NOT make guys like they used to, the guys are classless nowadays. Everyone screws each other and MORAL DECAY is real my friends!! How can I find a decent guy? I have read endless articles, books on dating. This culture is pure trash. I know I'm not the only one who feels like this way but it's OLD beyond old. All I want to do is go on dates, I've always been independent, and strong. I guess guys don't like classy women?? (link)
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You're not going to get anywhere if you think every male your age is a complete joke. You don't have to settle for anyone who isn't right for you but you're projecting as someone who is self-absorbed and think the entire process of dating or getting to know people is a joke if they don't conform right away to your expectation. You may have been ghosted or treated poorly by certain person(s) in the past but if you go into any situation thinking you're going to be crapped on guess what you'll never be able to connect with anyone.
You're putting out the image of someone who thinks she's a tough girl but is insecure as well as someone who isn't really taking them seriously. You're intimidating as well as confusing to them. You have to drop all that and the I won't take crap from anybody or my generation is a joke crap and relax. They're rejecting you 24/7 because this is the image of yourself that you're projecting onto a giant screen to them.
Decent guys your age and even a little younger do exist. Not everyone will reject you. You need to look at people who may seem ordinary or extremely lowkey which may not be this idea of what you think someone looks and sounds like. Those guys are the ones that make the right partners 9 timess out of 10 and lasting relationships. They may be right under your nose and it's important not to ignore people around you not fully on the radar.
You should swear off dating apps but rather join clubs, take courses (especiially drama) or something where you interests would already be shared and let things unfold. I think you also try to force things when a relationship if it happens needs to evolve.
Also, your friends and siblings if you have any know who you are. See if they can find someone that they feel would mesh with you. Above all chuck your current attitude and be open to anyone and everyone that comes into your experience. You won't be dating everyone you meet but don't write off anyone because you never know how good a partner they may have made. You have to learn not to be judgmental or pass it willingly or subconciously on to people so easily.
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Hello, I'm sixteen years old and my boyfriend just turned seventeen in January. We've been dating for about a month and a half now and I really like him! No one has treated me this well for a while. However, he's going to prison soon. He's facing up to twenty years and I don't know what to do. He's currently out on PR bond and we've discussed the aftermath.He doesn't want me to wait on him but I don't want to move on.. Any ideas on how to process this? (link)
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The reality is that this person is going to prison for a reason and if he's been given 20 years it was likely for something quite violent perhaps even murder or manslaughter.
It's evident that you are on the wrong track and with the wrong crowd if this person is your boyfriend. That is a wakeup call and needs to set in that you might even find yourself in trouble associating with the people you are.
He's going away for 20 years which is a hell of a long time and has thrown his life away at age 17. The likelihood you will want to be in a relationship with someone for that long isn't there. If you want to support him and visit do that but realize any kind of real relationship inside or out of prision isn't reality.
Romance wise and life wise you need to live your own life because he's not getting out any time soon. You have to progress and in time you'll get your life on track and find the right person. It just won't be him and he realizes it even if you don't see it yet.
What I would do is really look inward and figure out where you want to be and correct the mistakes that led to you being involved with someone who is going to be going to prision for a long time and deal with those feelings and move forward. There's nothing wrong about seeing a therapist for this either if something keeps you from moving forward.
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I have been going through a really tough time. My serious relationship of 3 yeas ended. The guy ditched me just before marriage. This my 3rd relationship failure. I'm 32. People around me are getting married and kids. I don't have many friends. I'm alone ans cry everyday. My confidence is shaking. I don't hv anyone to share my deepest feelings. I regret many things in life. I feel anxiety thinking about my future. (link)
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If someone leaves you before geting marraige it's about them more so than it is about you. You're going to be in tons of relationships in your life where some will work and others fail. That's normal. I would put no worry on three in a row not working. It's just coincidence. As long as you examine why each did honestly and learn lessons moving forward you'll be fine.
Your problem is your confidence in yourself and not valuing who you are. Until you can do that nobody else can love you because you don't love yourself. That's a big part of it you don't have a handle on your own identity and importance.
As far as being 32 it's just a number. Yes, others may be getting married but it's not a competition. Be glad you haven't married the wrong person. You'll eventually find the right person in time. Relax about that.
What you need to do is get your mental health in order. Go to your family doctor and mention the fact you lack friends, cry uncontrollably, have no confidence and constant regret. Tell them you can't share your feelings with others and think you are depressed. Try and get a referal to a psychiatrist as well as support groups and programs. It will be okay but you need to get this asessed or you won't be able to move forward with your life.
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I am from india. I am a student preparing for competitive exam and i study but most of time i don't have motivation and i waste my time. (link)
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The problem may be that you are trying to cram too much into your brain at once. What you need to do is take the subject let's say it's a final exam for science class. If it it encompasses everything break it all down into units.
Spend the evening focuses on two or so areas and study each unit for 15-20 mins each then take a break for 15 minutes and go back to it for another 15-20 until you feel confident you are able to remember the content. Studying in increments rather than non stop for several hours makes it easier and you'll retain it more. Spend one day on X and then another on Y and it will come a lot easier.
If you break studying up like that you definetly won't waste your time. You could make it even easier not to by forming a study group with classmates or create your own. That may help you focus more.
The next question you need to ask yourself is what is my ultimate goal? Yes, the immediate one is to pass but why do you want to pass it? Is it a step towards a potential career or diploma? Do you need it to graduate? If you can come up with some kind of reward in your mind to atttain by passing than that could drive you and boost motivation.
Another study tactic is to find someone be it a friend or family member and tell them the part you just studied and tried to remember and have them ask you mock questions about it so you'll see where you are in terms of retention.
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There is a cop that has been working on a case involving the place where I work. He comes in all the time when I’m there and seems like he’s flirting with me. Is it weird or inappropriate to friend/message him on Facebook? (link)
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It's inappropriate to try and friend someone you don't know and same for contacting a person through messenger without them knowing who you are. You may like this guy but what you think is flirting may just be his normal demeanour. Also, if he's investigating where you work that's a conflict of interest. It could also cost you a job. I would let this go.
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I have this really sweet guy friend I met online and we’ve been hanging out every now and then for the past I’ll say 5 months. We do text and talk often and we are physical as well.
I’ve been around him with his friends randomly. No major introductions.
So I was with him like February 7th and then I haven’t heard from him since. It’s going on about 4 to 5 days now of us not speaking. I don’t know anyone he knows and I don’t want to seem like a psychopath or stalker and message his mom but I am concerned about him. And I’ve text him and I have called him once. And I just wanted to know should I just let him contact me when everything is okay or should I go ahead and message his mom because I do care about this guy. (link)
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Unless you have reason to believe he's in danger or in a situation where he might wind up that way than the last thing I would do is contact his mom. That could kill anything you have going on with him be it friend or more. It's Feb. 12th right now. February 7th wasn't that long ago. It could be that he's really tied up with stuff you don't know about and will get back to you. You've called and texted once and need to back off and let him approach you. He will if he's interested and if not let it be.
You also have to be aware if you met online that not everyone is who they say they are and or may be seeing multiple people. Be sure about who he is before going further. I wouldn't be concerned about him because you have nothing to go on to suggest he's not alright or in danger. Give it a week and don't call anyone he knows including his mom and see if he approaches you.
If he's interested in you believe me he knows you are there and will definetly be around or trying to include you in future but if time passes by and he's not contacted you than it's a sign that for whatever reason he's moved on and instead of being mature has left you to find out.
I'm hoping it's a situation of being swamped with something you aren't aware of or a situation where he hasn't been able to talk as often as you do usually. Key word: wait. See what happens in next little while.
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An ex-friend of mine has been messing with me and my friend, This all happened on Tuesday where she came up to me and another friend and started to talk about my friend, she called her (I'm sorry for my language) a bitch and said she was rude to her for no reason. After she said this I told my friend about it, which then my friend asked her why she would say that, which then my ex-friend denied it and said I was trying to start stuff with her. I talked to our school counselor about it. The next day she came up to me and my group of friends and told me that I need to stop spreading lies, but she also admitted that she said it by saying that I laughed when she called my friend a female dog, and I said why would I lie and call my friend a female dog which she then called me crazy and walked away. On Thursday my friend and her "Talked it out" but she kept lying saying that I made it up and I was the one who said, but she also said she didn't have a social media which was a lie cause I know her Instagram. By Friday me and my friend were over and we needed to worry about our science fair. during the science fair, someone took my friends chips and spilled them all over the floor, I do remember my ex-friend coming over to the group of people next to us and reaching behind meI know this because she hit my back when she pulled away but we couldn't do anything about since we didn't know who did it but I have a feeling it was her, so far that's all that has happened. (link)
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Having a feeling someone did something but not actually seeing them do are often two different things. You can have a suspicion that someone did something but cannot pin it on them. She may have in all likihood but you have to forget about it and move forward.
It seems like this person is used to being the center of attention and craves that constantly because she doesn't feel good about herself or validated. For whatever reason whether she'll admit it or not you matter in her universe. She would rather have negative attention than to leave you alone. She also knows you aren't apt to confront her.
What you need to establish is what her real grievance is and try to understand where she's coming from. If you have been friends before for a lon time and suddenly something went to shit you need to know why and if she's making it into something huge that isn't. She's probably very sensitive and seeing things through that prism.
Was she worth being friends with at one time? If so, I would approach her alone and ask her using these words WTF happened to our friendship? Have it out but don't accuse of lying or use any of the language she's used with you and your other friend and agree to be friends or decide not to. Make it firm that you will not tolerate and nor will your friend or teachers the bullshit and bullying anymore. Leave it at that and ignore it because she's looking for an audience. If she doesn't get it she will move on eventually but you should try to talk about it with her first. That may defuse the anger.
When it comes to the friend I have a feeling it's a case of feeling left out and that someone else is filling her role. She's trying to hurt your friend to hurt you but it's really about what she's thinking about her own self. I would tell your friend not to react to any of this and let you handle it.
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This isn’t so much a friendship question as it about roommates. I recently moved to this new place. Everything was fine until one of my roommates started smoking weed. The smell is nauseating and I honestly don’t want the stuff in my system. I’m getting very pissed off, especially when the place has a policy against alcohol, drugs and tobacco. I don’t want to out them, but I also don’t think they’ll stop just because I asked them to.
What should I do? Should I ask them to stop smoking? This is the first time this is happening to me. I don’t know what I should do. By the way, they’re also aged 18-19, so I’m pretty sure its underage use of the stuff as well. (link)
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If you are in Canada it's legal provided it's in your own dwelling. The fact is they aren't apt to quit for anybody any time time soon. Making a big deal out of it may cause tension for the entire time you are there which will make things tough.
I would mention to them that you value their friendship and their right to smoke marijuana when they choose even though it's not your deal. Mention that your system is highly sensitive and the smell makes you feel ill.
Tell them it's nothing personal but can we compromise and have you do it in the washroom and turn the fan on and or step out back and come back in when done smoking? This way you're not causing them an issue but are also dealing with your concerns without causing a potential rift.
You should also ask them if there's a way for them to obtain the strain they use in pill, spray or edible form from a dispensiary or whatever their source is as that will not involve a stentch.
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Hi I'm a 25/f, and I have a super busy life working and taking care of my one year old. My job is very later back so I'm not as active as I'd like to be, and my diet is extremely bad. I would love to make healthy meals at home, however my living situation makes that extremely difficult. My place doesn't have a kitchen, and the only way to make anything is to buy premade, or microwave it... I feel like surviving off microwave meals would be the death of me. What could I do to make this easier on me? (link)
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One thing you should do that will greatly help is to book an appointment with your doctor about your diet. Have him/her refer you to a dietition who will know your situation and why the diet is awful. That person can help make a diet plan with you that will fit your lifestyle. They can monitor your weight and any other medical situation that is contributing.
Another thing you should do on top is look for parks and rec and or cheap courses on cooking that will teach you what you need to know to use a micowave to make wholesome dishes. There's bound to be recipe books or even stuff on the Internet too in terms of recipes you can do using the equipment and stuff you have on hand.
It's hard and I have the same issue because I'm always downtown to avoid fast-food. My advice is to avoid the usual haunts and not eat there. Pack a sandwhich with veggies and start training yourself not to eat in these places.
Try to find a soup, salad, sandwich joint or even Panera Bread but some meals they serve have more calories than others. If you look at menus for restaurants and can figure out the correct calories you'll do better when you can't be at home.
Also, do yourself an enormous favor at start drinking water, tea, milk or coffee. Don't drink anything with sugar in it whatsoever. When you switch to water you can buy tiny droplets or use lemon and squirt it in the water to ween yourself off pop. That will make an enormous difference as would not eating cookies, chocolate or sugar in general.
If you are really concerned ask your doctor to do all the tests you need to for ruling out diabetes because if you have a horrid diet and it's been a long term thing you could wind up in trouble there. You want your creatinine level to be right.
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23 years male from Nigeria..... I met this girl about two months ago in school, you see I just got admission into university and we are both in the same class. When I first met her we clicked we had so much in common we became beasties,she would follow me around school and we call and talk to each other on the phone...she tells me deep personal stuff after herself and her family, she even jokingly said I should ask her out in like 3 months time....everything was going great until we both traveled for Christmas break but still got in touch with each other on the phone... She was even the first person to call and wish me happy new year...although I've not officially asked her out but we were like boyfriend/girlfriend..... on getting to school this January she just changed, if I call her to come over to my place she would say she's busy that she can't come, if I asked to meet after school she would say she is shy of face to face conversation(which she was not)that I should tell her what I want to on the phone...when she sees me in class she will just say hi and walk away...I've called and asked her why she's behaving that way but she says it's nothing....
Please I need advice I really like this girl (link)
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I would back off and not contact her or have anything to do with her for awhile. Let her come to you. If she's interested in you in any fashion be it friend or more she will come around when she notices you haven't been around.
There's a chance she's frustrated with you. Maybe she's trying to be a friend but doesn't want that boy/girl relationship that you're looking for so she's backing off of you. I have a feeling that she's just not that in to you and isn't sure about being a friend either.
Perhaps she truly is busy with family stuff, school or preoccupied with something difficult that you don't know about. She could also have family that don't approve of you or doesn't want her hanging out with boys or have issues with culture that way. You just don't know but believe me if you totally back off of her and she wants you around as a friend or otherwise she'll come to you eventually. If she doesn't want either than you'll know to move on when she doesn't talk to you. I know you really like her but the ball's got to be put in her court.
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