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Dating while lesbian
16 female. I'm openly lesbian, and my life is fine for the most part. Despite living in a small, conservative town that would probably fit the stereotype for being homophobic, I do just fine. In all areas except one: dating.
Tbh, being a lesbian feels pretty lonely. I've had a few gfs before, but none now. It feels like there's such a small population of lesbian and bi girls, then you narrow it down to people you'd actually like, then the ones who are single, then the ones who would like you...and there just isn't a dating pool.
And it feels like most of the LGBT stuff is so geared towards guys all the time, it annoys tf out of me that gay and bi men get their own bars and clubs all over the damn place, but girls have to just mingle in with the all-around "queer" spots. I'm too young to enter a bar, but that's besides the point. I feel like it's also a lot easier if you're a guy, to tell if another guy is gay and if he's flirting with you. Girls are very confusing.
I actually do know queer girls right now...one of them is a bi girl dating a guy who is also my best friend that I'd never see that way, a close friend of mine who I'm not attracted to, a girl who I might consider but I have no opportunity to talk to and I think she dislikes me for some reason, a girl who is not very pretty and kind of a bitch, a girl who's not my type and kind of a bitch, a girl I'm not attracted to and likes someone else, a girl who I think is bi but has a bf she genuinely likes, a girl who's ok looking and cool but also a dysfunctional pothead, this girl who's a total bitch and who hates me, a girl who I would 100% date but also has a gf, another dysfunctional pothead who gets suspended every other day, a girl I already dated and who has commitment issues, another dysfunctional drug addict I already dated, a girl who I dated and has no personality, these other 2 girls with no personalities and who are kind of bitchy, a girl who already rejected me, a girl with a gf and a bi girl with a bf (both of whom I'm not interested in), some girl who isn't interested in dating, and a girl who dated one of my closest friends. Not a good lineup.
My friends always tell me I should go online to do it, but I don't really like the idea of online dating. Idk. My mom says it'll be easier in college, but seems like a long time to wait.
How tf do I get a gf?
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16 years old is too young to determine your sexuality for your entire life. Much of what you experience with a female, you can experience with a male. Enjoy and express your sexulity and date boys and girls your age. Enjoy your youth and sexuality. Date people your age who has a mutual attraction with you. You can decide your sexual identity when you are 20 to 30 years old.
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In a small town with practically no dating pool to speak of, there isn't anything you can do now. I am sure you are disappointed but I can hardly imagine what you expected me to say, wave your magic wand and make the perfect person appear, maybe? Short of the magic that happens on screen and movies, your living in a small town is what the problem is.
So its down to a matter of waiting two years til you are an adult and go to college or just get a
roommate in a bigger city with lots of LGBTQ outlets, or if you have a supportive Aunt or grandma who lives in such a city and will take you now if you go live with them til college, and transfer schools and such, there is no other way.
With the situation you are in, the option of talking to others like you on line is about all you can do. I wouldn't do it withe the intent of it being a substitute for a dating relationship, just a friendship.
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