|
humorist-workshop
Is it intimate to share a ciggie with a boy mate?
Hello, is sharing a ciggie mean anything at all between friends when out having drink? Is it intimate as i've heard so. Told him he can have the last one but he was the one who suggested to share before I go buy a new pack also he was the one who asked me if I'd fancy a drink. We both smoke but we've never shared a ciggie before. We talked and joked while sharing ciggie and I felt like there was a bit of flirt going on. We do joke loads but I don't know but felt different when we went out for a drink. What do you think? I mean I don't know if it's a date or not. He does say you're a good mannered girl and we both go to same college. Thankyou
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
This is dictionary's explanation for intimacy:
1. closely acquainted; familiar, close.
"intimate friends"
2.
private and personal.
"going into intimate details of his sexual
encounters"
Based on all that, just the sharing of a cigarette is an intimate act between close friends.
If you feel there was flirting, there probably was, women's intuition is pretty good at that. You might want to bring up some you-tube videos to watch on what body language signs a guy shows when interested. This is also a much needed sign to know if the flirting is a show of interest because sometimes people do not flirt because they are exactly attracted and want the other person in a close relationship. Even married couples will do harmless flirting just for the joy of it and to keep up their flirting skills. So there's always a chance the flirting isn't a serious enough factor to take in on its on. If you are considering the time spent with your male friend as an official date due to things that occurred, be careful, you may be overthinking it. I know of guys who never ask a girl out on an official date, like my 2nd husband and it just evolves from friendship to adding in being sexual partners and then both knowing that 'this person is the one' and both committing to a life long relationship with or with rings. If you want to know exactly where he stands, if he sees you only as a close friend and has no stronger feelings, or whether he is wanting you as his girlfriend but too afraid to ask you need to pose a question so it seems like a thought that just came to mind and not a planned question to gain information. Here's what to say:
We have been doing really great together as friends. It just made me wonder how we would do together as 'more than friends'. What do you think?
Its important to ask what he thinks for two reasons. One is that it will reinforce more that this was a thought that came up on the spur of the moment, not revealing that you might already have stronger feelings for him than just friends.
and 2. He will see this as his chance to say its a good idea if he is that into you and afraid to ask and so its easier to just slide easily into the relationship he may want. But just as well, because you asked his opinion, he may say he only likes you as a friend and nothing more so it wouldn't work as there are no romantic feelings towards you. Of course his words may not be exactly as I stated but will make the answer plain for you to see. You though must ask your question just as I stated, or you may not get the true answers you want. Then you'd know whether this is someone you can date or if he only remains a friend while you keep the feelers out looking for a guy for romantic interests.
]
Smoking is (perhaps quite rightly) very out of favour these days. But it was not always so. Smoking had conventions and etiquette and a symbolism. Offering a cigarette to someone when we had one ourselves was such a social convention. We could offer (if we desired to be friendly with the other person) or possibly withold the offer if we wanted to 'keep our distance' as it were. Actually sharing the same cigarette is a certain sign of being comfortable with a higher-than-usual level of intimacy with a person, for sure. You are, after all putting the same item into your mouths. You've got to like someone pretty much before you do that, wouldn't you agree? So, a long way of saying "Yes, it's intimate".
]
More Questions: |