I told my crush I like him and now he is avoiding me (I am gay)
Question Posted Tuesday January 24 2017, 9:09 pm
I met a guy a year ago, he seemed to like me because he was always hugging me, invited me to his family meetings, texted me just to wish a good week, told me he wanted me to know him more, sometimes he seemed jealous after I spoke of a girl in my job and after that avoided me when I tried to contact him. Anyway some days after that I decided to tell him I liked him. It was difficult because he really was making up excuses. Finally I told him, but he said he liked me as a friend. So I decided to take my distance for some time. It's been 4 months since then. He texted me like once a month but completely avoided me when in person. He sees me walking by and changes direction to avoid me or takes out his phone to avoid conversation. When I am alone he comes directly where I am to say hi, smiles and leaves. Not another word. No conversation. What is happening to him? Does he feel anything?
[ Answer this question ] Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category? Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life? Dragonflymagic answered Wednesday January 25 2017, 11:27 pm: Does he feel anything? Feelings are emotions. So lets turn the tables on you because I think you will then see the answer for yourself. If you were in his shoes and theres a group of people guys and gals that are your friend group. One day a girl in the group whom you have spent lots of fun with away from the group, tells you that she has a big crush on you .
You are gay and don't feel that way for her and let her know. Just because you don't feel that way for her doesn't mean she can so easily turn off her feelings for you. So when the group gets together, this girl sees you and you can tell she is still trying to come after you. She isn't taking no for an answer. So how would you feel having any contact with this girl knowing how she feels. Do you picture yourself enjoying hanging out when shes in the picture. Would you put yourself through the uncomfortable torture of having her try to get you to decide you're hetero and want her or would you fight and yell at her to try to scare her off, or would you just simply avoid any contact by phone, text in person, etc.
Bascally, you are trying to imagine how your guy friend is feeling. You may come to a different conclusion but since the change in behavior came immediately after you told him, I'd say he is avoiding you because of how you feel. It would make any average person feel uncomfortable to have a person who is in love with them watching them all day and night, watching your every move with love filled eyes.Its pretty hard for people to just remain close friends when one shares how they feel and the other doesn't. The same goes for hetero people too. This is more about feeling uncomfortable now knowing the others true feelings rather than being about one's sexual orientation. [ Dragonflymagic's advice column | Ask Dragonflymagic A Question ]
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