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Got in a little fight with my parents
This issue happened over the weekends. My sister and I are back in town for the holidays. We haven't been to our family's local church in a while. The night before, we all got our church clothes ready and my mom asked me to fix my hair so I won't spend all morning on it that would cause my sister and I to run late. I'd asked my sister for help with fixing my hair but she decided to go last minute shopping. So I ended up doing it myself using certain hair products that ends up leaving residues in my hair the next morning. Long story short next morning, my parents asked me to change into another outfit at the last minute before they left the house (left no room to argue about alternatives), my sister notice the residues in my hair and spent half hour trying to comb it all out before noon (so my hair doesn't look like it has crazy dandruff build up), both me and my sister almost felt discourage to attend due to time, and both of us showed up late to church missing out most of the sermon.
My parents knew we showed up late, were furious with me about it, and then blamed the whole thing ON ME. We got into a little argument about it that left me pretty upset with their accusation. Even though everything calm down later over Christmas, my sister explained the hair situation to my parents, and my parents are no longer mad, I still felt a little bothered by that afternoon and how the accusation wasn't fair to me. And I don't know if that's really something for me to ignore. I'm also not sure how to start a calm conversation over the whole thing with them, if I were to bring that up again.
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It is the Christmas season a time of good will and happiness. You have calmed down some, your sister explained to your parents why you were late and they are no longer mad or upset. In your position I would just let this one slide for now and just enjoy the holiday at home with your family.
From your letter I believe you and your sister, since says "back in town for the holidays," are of adult age now. If your parents make a habit of blaming you from things when you do visit then you need to address it, if not then just let it be.
Bear in mind one thing though, the hardest thing for any parent is to let go. They have been fully responsible for you for anywhere from 18 to 21 years or more depending on how long you are in school. Then suddenly you are out on your own fully living an adult life and nest is truly empty. When the children do return to the nest to visit we have a tendency to over react.
Is it possible this is what happened Christmas day? As yourself that question and if the answer is yes then let it go. If the answer is no then after you return to your home write mom and dad a letter. Explain to them you’re an adult know and may soon or someday have a family of your own (your choice of wording). Tell them as an adult you did not appreciate the anger vented at you for something that was beyond your control. You tried to be polite and do as they requested and what they requested is part and parcel of the problem that materialized which they failed to comprehend.
Go on to say in the future you expect to be spoken to as an adult and not to be yelled at for something they may not understand. You would understand if you had done something that caused you harm and scared them but this was not the case. Please in the future think first talk second so we can all enjoy the limited time we will have together in the future.
The reason I say put this in a letter or email as if you tried to tell them this in person you would probably be cut off. I know from experience this is needed as my son had to do something very similar with me.
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