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living hell
hi i am 24 years old who lives with my ex boy friend (i was seeing him when we moved in together and no we have split up)
he drives me nuts and pisses me off alot i dont want live here anymore i dont like going home. for me to get him of the tenancy agreement it will cost me £120 which i dont have. i am paying all the bills and he refuses to get a job. im getting so stressed out by it all. i have looked into moving out myself but again i need £120 and i would move back to my parents. this would make him homeless he doesnt know anybody in this area of the UK at all. he is 33 but acts like a child and its so frustrating.i can also go out for a night with my friends and i come back to no food in the house at all he has gone through his food and mine. i cant afford to keep doing this. it makes not want to go anywhere so i can keep an eye whats going on i dont trust him at all.
i guess what im asking your advice on is how i go about getting him out my life for good i cant cope anymore i have moved on and its now causing me issues with my current relationship. i just dont know what to do im making myself ill trying to work it out.
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Sometimes what is called for is tough love or in your case biting the bullet and moving on. You say you can't afford the 120 Pounds not that you don't have the funds. If you do have the funds pay the money and move out and back in with your parents.
I know this is not the thing you want to do your 24 and would rather be an adult and out on your own. Unfortunately this is the way of the world today where adult children sometimes need the safety net of their parents homes. You are among the fortunate that your parents will do this for you. This is your safety net which allows you to get you life in order, save some money so you can go out on you own this time with proper finances to do so.
As for you ex this is the tough love thing comes in. Tell him you are out of there. That the rent is paid until, whenever it is paid till after that he will either need to find away to pay the rent or move out.
Like it or not by you paying all the bills you have enabled him to be as he is. It may seem horrible to walkout on him and leave him to fend for himself and possibly be homeless, though it is the best thing you can do for him.
Give him a firm date that you are moving out or that the rent is paid till. Thirty days is reasonable as it gives him time to find a job and someplace to live. You can move out today if you want and you should. Leave whatever food is there but don't buy and additional food for him.
Most of all stand your ground. No matter what he say or how hard he may begs you move out. He needs this tough love if he is ever to grow up and be responsible for himself.
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