|
WTF IS THE POINT OF LYING???
if a man is not engaged or married but is dating a woman exclusively.....would you consider him as single.....I asked a few men this question and they have g/f's n fiancée's and they told me, they are single because that person they are with isn't their wife ....what do you think about this... personally I think it is wrong 2 lie and say you are single just because she isn't your wife.....that 2 me says you want 2 cheat and have cheated or will cheat soon if the right fukktard comes along...da hell??? why cant men just be honest for once in their lives??? that shyt deters me from dating....cuz like ive said before if dude aint tryna cheat, he wanna come out the closet or murder you, there aren't many options left...smdh times a million....
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
As in the dictionary you'll find words with several total different meanings, so it is with the word single in the context you are sharing.
As far as seeing themselves single cus they are not married, think of forms you fill out, for the Drs. office, a job interview, etc. where there is a space for marital status and the only choices are:
single married or divorced
so to day they are single is telling the truth. But it is more than that. And most people would know and understand that a person asking them and not having them fill out a form, are actually wanting to know if they are free to date or are they"
seeing someone, dating someone, in a committed relationship, engaged or married. Even an engaged guy is technically still single untiil married but not available to date if he's a one woman man.
So it may be best to go differently at how one asks another person their status.
So your first question then of not engaged or married but is dating a woman exclusively, the man is single but NOT available. I suggest not using the word single which I know most everyone does. Try asking if the guy is married, engaged, dating, exclusive with, committed to, or seeing someone. They can still lie and I have had to go through that with adult men later in life when I divorced and began to seek my new mate. I did find him but not until I met some lousy men who lied to me, out there. Met some great ones too but we were too different, nothing in common.
The thing is to get good at catching inconsistencies in one person to determine wether they are who they say they are or not. A good way to find if theres another lady in his life but he's hiding it is to ask to meet his family, parents and siblings cus if he's aiming to cheat with you, he can't very easily introduce you as his gf on the side now can he?
Or dont even come out and say you are interested or want to date and ask these things. Just find a way to have a converstation with him and ask a few questions and answer some yourself and then ask the one thing you really want to know but don't make it your only point blank question: Would you consider yourself a One woman man? No matter his answer, don't get upset, just ask him if he minds explaining why and doing this casually. That way you know what you need to know and he won't know you were interested. If a guy asked you out, then you could say you are only interested in monogamous men, the ones who are a one woman man, so if he isn't, thats okay for him but to please go looking elsewhere than with you. Then warn him if he says he has no one else but in dating him you discover that he lied, you will dump him immediately and heres the catch, lots of women don't dump the guy and it was empty threats so the man will not respect your rules and boundaries and you will keep running into guys like him until you do learn. When women threaten guys but end up staying with him hoping to convince him to leave the other woman, then they are not being the best person themselves because they have developed feelings and figure its easier to stay and get what ever little bit of him they can even if its really a bad deal. This tactic trains men to not respect women and they feel they can get away with anything they want cus most women are so desperate for a man in their lives that they will take just about anything so theres no need for them to be straigtht upstanding people who are kind and thouhtful and truthful, etc. In this, many women have some part in teaching men the wrong way. Not like training in a class or training a pet cus that sounds awful. I am talking about the training/teaching they get from observing a strong woman state what she wants and will not put up with and who will be looking for lots of inconsistencies in his character so if he's not what shes looking for, she'll dump him.
I actually had that kind of talk on first face to face meet ups with guys that I met on dating sites. I laid it all out and told them, this is truly who I am, what I need and want and if you feel right now that you can not be or are not the type of guy i am looking for, then i am fine with you saying so and just walking away. If you are toying with me and I begin to see inconsistencies in your character and who you say you are, your morals, your priorities, etc... and it doesnt fit what i like, then i will break it off.
Most men admired that. There were two who said they were on board but in the 2nd or 3rd date i caught each of them in a lie. So when I confronted them, they got angry. I wasn't angry just stating that i would no longer see them and date them because of the lies and that pissed them off that they couldn't get away with it. I wish you the best in the future with finding Mr Right. If you come up with any specific question on this process, just write me any time. If its pertaining a guy you've interacted with, its best if I know exactly what he said, you said and what was happening at the time so keep notes right after a confrontation, bad event and try to keep the convo as accurate if relaying back to me to ask help. Best wishes.
]
More Questions: |