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How to move on
I am 23 yrs old, I started dating my boyfriend 10 months ago, he asked me to be his girlfriend as though he was proposing to me,he told me that he would never hurt me and he loved me and wanted us to spend the rest of our lives together...i was happy I thought this was going to be my last relationship after all the heart breaks I had been through, though we live an hour apart he was so sweet in the first 3 months of our relationship,he visited me every week, we had our first kiss after during a wedding ceremony,he was the first guy I ever celebrated vals day with though I have dated other people, he treated me well then things started changing, he stopped visiting, rarely called in fact I was doing to calling and texting and sometimes he wouldn't even reply or respond to my calls, this started when I wasnt able to get a job, I have never asked him for money or any material thing so it wasn't as if I was a liability,then I got one,which was really close to where he lives so we became closer and he became nice towards me again, but things changed. I am a virgin and its been hard for me to have sex with him, one day when I couldn't do it because it was painful and told him to pull out, he was silent for a while and then he told me I needed to stop visiting him frequently. I was sad because this is someone who told me he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me. I loved him and I just couldn't believe he said that to me. The next morning I packed my things and left he didn't call me or beg, I called him after 4days and we were back again. I quit my job because I couldn't handle it, and then he changed again, this time it was really bad, he didn't talk to me for a week and everytime I called he said he was resting, and busy, I complained told him that our relationship was suffering, he told me that I was disturbing him. After a week he started taking my calls but it didn't last for too long. He stopped inviting me out for functions with him, when I asked if I could come along he gave me an excuse. Another time he went for a wedding in another state and didn't tell me when he left and came back, I called and he was very rude to me on the phone we had a fight after that incident and didn't talk to each other. He started a new job during that period and I was tired of the silence so I decided to find out how he was, he didn't pick or reply my text, I was really sober I reminded him about all the times we shared in the beginning but he told me that my messages were nasty..He didn't talk me for two weeks,i called he never picked so I decided not to communicate with him for a while, he was even rude to my sister when she tried to find out what the problem was, yesterday I called him and he picked, I asked him why he was behaving this way and he said he had been busy at work( for two weeks). I told him that he shouldnt give me that as an excuse because he can't be so busy for two weeks and he wouldn't contact someone he is dating. We talked for a while and I told him that things need to change he told me that he would think about it and then we hung up. Today I realised that no one is ever to busy to do what they want to do and that he is just not interested in me again, and he can't be man enough to tell me it's over.. I sent him a message and I ended it though he didn't reply... It's been really hard and I just want to move on
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You definitely need to move on. This is out of control and you're just torturing yourself calling him, asking him for explanation and trying to get back together. He clearly is a jerk and he doesn't truly love you. You deserve much better than this. Much much better. So think of your own good, and forget this guy. Don't call him and if he does, ignore him. Don't let him treat you like this not knowing where you stand. He talks to you, then he doesn't.. You don't deserve that crap. You'll be much better off without him and giving up on him just means space in your life for someone amazing who will truly love you and treat you like a queen.
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