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How to handle my mom and boyfriend both
I have been dating my boyfriend for 5 months. I'm 16 and he's about to turn 18. We love each other very much and are going to make it work while he's in college. I can see myself having a future with him and he even got me a promise ring. He was cheated on in a previous relationship and he though he would never make another girl happy. He makes me so happy though! He does have a few rules though. He doesn't want me to talk to other guys. This hasn't been that hard for me but he doesn't talk to other girls at all(not at my request). He doesn't want me to stay at my house when my brother has friends over because he doesn't trust other guys. He says he 100% trusts me though. He also doesn't mind that I want to go to the beach but he wants to be there when I do go. I love him to death and I want to marry him someday. My mom got mad at me because she figured out the reason I won't go to the beach with them and she's mad that I chose my boyfriend over them. I told my boyfriend she thought he was controlling and he got really mad at her and refuses to speak to her or see her. The only reason he has these rules is because I know he cares a lot and he's scared he will lose me to someone else like his last girlfriend. Breaking up is completely out of the question because I would be nothing without him. What should I do?
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Hi love....Just keep in mind that you are 16 and your mom obviously wants the best for you. If you begin your relationship like this in the first 5 months it might only get worse. You have to remind him that you are not his ex and if he still treats you this controlling way that you are not going put up with it. Him being this controlling is very exhausting. Think of how crazy this is that you cant go to the beach??? Most likely if you go to the beach no guys are going to talk to you if you go with your family. Try and remind him that trust is all in a relationship and if you have no trust you have no relationship. There shouldn't be rules. Accept his history and reassure him you have no interest in any other guys. Tell him that you understand why hes protective and you appreciate that because you know how much he cares about you but its not healthy for either one of you. Im thinking your boyfriend refuses to talk to your mom because he knows he in the wrong. You should tell him too that it is a deal breaker if the two people you love wont speak to each other. This is too much stress for one to handle. I think you just need to sit down with him and tell him that you love him uncontrollably and your not interested in anyone else. You are not his ex and if he cant forgive and forget his ex in the past his current relationship with you will never grow. I hope this has helped you. Relationships can be hard but they should never be this hard. if you need any more advice or questions email me. ashnangle@gmail.com
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