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I think a friend likes me?
So this girl I've been friends with since 6th grade, so only a year (I'm a 12 year old female) we are both in 7th grade. Not long, but we've become close. She has acted a little "I like you" around me. So in Gym we were playing basketball with some other friends. So my team which was me, her, M (I'm calling people by the first letter of their name) and M #2 who got hit in the head and was at the nurse with M #3 from the other team. Long story short, A asked if we wanted to switch teams. A #2 (the girl mentioned at the beggining) automatically said,"I want M (me) on my team!" And took my hand. Gently...I held it because I didn't want to hurt her feelings...I am attracted to girls, but there is this other girl I like. Even after it was decided we'd remain on the same team she held it. Idk it's weird. This is special to me because it's the first time someone took my hand. I see her as a friend but it felt good. The girl I like has kind of moved closer to me when we were working on science, we were kind of acting romantic with each other. Two other girls I'm friends with have done similar things! Hey they all want me ;). But I only want one and she's expressed the least interest in me. I'll rank them:
1. A
2. I
3. T
4. H
Do you think she likes me?
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It sure sounds like she likes you romantically. For me, I don't have to have romantic feelings to 'like a person'. I'm straight so when I used the term that I liked certain girls, it meant that I liked their personalities and they liked mine and we had enough in common to become friends. I have never been friends with someone I don't like. And even in a romantic relationship, couples of any sort and including marriages, need to be best of friends first. But I want to clarify its not enough for romantic love. People have something invisible called pheremones that our subconsciouses pick up on and many don't believe it is that important but I beg to differ. Lets put it this way. Since you believe yourself to be attracted to females, lets say pheremones is that wonderful exciting feeling and wanting more from a kiss of someone with similar pheremones to you. When pheremones differ too much, neither will be attracted to each other or only one will be attracted romantically. What this feels like is romantic kissing of your mom or aunt. It would feel disgusting, turn you off and you want to back away from it. I have been kissed by men whom it felt like I was romantically kissed by a brother or father so instead of feeling good it was repulsive. At your age, some of you may be correct and remain gay your life, others may explore more and discover yourself to be bi sexual, capable of being attracted to just one man whom you marry and have lots of female lovers on the side. I have actually met quite a few women just like that and it worked and their husbands knew ahead and supported this part of her. You are only just starting to explore your sexuality. You don't need to have it all figured out yet and be a pro at relationships instantly. As far as sex goes, it can be a lifetime of learning experiences and new discoveries. I have not yet stopped experiencing new things sexually and I am in my fifties. So enjoy the girls where both of you are attracted enough to each other to make it work and don't force it or push for the others constantly as that would be like sexual harassment. It doesnt have to be just unwanted attentions from a male to a female.
If you want my opinion on A, I'd say she is a bit afraid to acknowledge any feelings she has toward you as far as romantically inclined but her hidden desires will surface and cause her to take actions and say things that reveal what her conscious mind isn't ready to accept. There is no reason to force her to come to grips with this yet. But if you enjoy her most, allow her to set the pace and accept what she offers even if she calls it only friendship but to you feels more like a romantically involved couple. At 12, she shouldn't have to declare she is strictly gay or bi. And you shouldn't demand that of her either. Part of any hesitnacy coould be the scariness of new territory, or sex isn't spoken of in her home and she was raised to avoid the topic of sex or thiinking about it, or parents could be highly religious and believe anything other than monogamy between a man and woman is a sin and that is something she wont feel free to explore in any of those cases until she is older and more likely an adult at 18 where her decisions are now her own and the parents can't make her life miserable if she was caught doing innocent stuff like holding hands with you a lot at her house. The parents won't see that sa fitting what they accept as normal if they are closed minded. So just go with the flow and enjoy whatever type of relationship you get with her and forget about labeling it.
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