Question Posted Thursday December 17 2015, 4:56 pm
Hi i'm 16 years old and i am from the Philippines but i live in Holland. I really like this boy and i want to ask if i should confess to him. I like him for about 5 years and i just can't my hide my feelings anymore it's like mmy heart is going to explode. I can't talk to him privately because he is always with his friends. Please gelp me!!! (Sorry fpr my bad English)
My suggestion would be to start by trying to get to know him (or by letting him get to know you...) as friends first. Once you have hung out as friends for a while, probably in group settings, as this is most natural, then maybe you should ease your way into a conversation in which you can bring up your feelings.
As Dragonflymagic said, it may be rather overwhelming for him if you just go up to him and tell him that you like him. It would be better to give him a chance to get to know you a little better first. [ evm987's advice column | Ask evm987 A Question ]
Dragonflymagic answered Thursday December 17 2015, 7:51 pm: Lets turn the situation around and lets say that a boy you've known for 5 years comes up to you one day and confesses to you that he really likes you. You are going to react one of two ways. If you like him too, you'd say I like you too. If you don't like him in a romantic way, wouldn't you feel awkward and bad at having to say "I don't like you that way." His feelings will be hurt. So if you blurted this out to him, and he didnt feel the same way, you put him in that awkward spot and you will feel really hurt to be turned down. Sometimes that is the case in real life. It happens to all people of all different ages. The best thing would be to ask to hang out together as friends. Start at the friendship level (for his sake, even tho you are already interested in him). This is more easy and natural for a guy and gives him a chance to really get to know more about you other than what you look like, but your traits, character and personality. Those are the things that really make a difference when wise people are choosing who to date or befriend or marry. I don't know if there are personal lockers in school with air vents you can toss a note into, but thats what my friends did when we were this age. There has to be a time when he isn't standing talking to friends but traveling between classes or some such thing. Have a prepared note on you and tap him on the arm as you walk by, saying read this please and hand him the note. The note should say something like, Hi, I'm Lina in case you don't know. I have been aware of you for some time and am interested in hanging out together and being friends. I didnt want to ask in front of your friends since I dont want to embarass you. If interested, here is my phone number, to give me a call. " Or if you are on any social media online that is popular in Holland with the teens, put any of yours in that note too. This seems to be the way most teens feel comfortable starting to interact with someone they like. [ Dragonflymagic's advice column | Ask Dragonflymagic A Question ]
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