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theres this guy that I like
There is this guy which i be liked for four years. He has said that he likes me back but I don't get it because he keeps dating other girls. He says he loves me. He said it again the day my friend and him just broke up! I tell him to stop talking I said that if he loved me why would he go out with other people! Is he just playing with me? I'm I his 'get back girl'(The girl he comes back to when he's not dating)? He hasn't actually asked me out he says stuff like "if I asked you out would you say yes?" But I would say "are you asking me out?" He would say kind of that he doesn't know.
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
I dont know your ages so I'll have to wing it.
Very young teens are inexperienced and not prone to commiting for long to any one person. No one really should commit to being bf/gf or being in a long term relationship until they are pretty sure about the person and have gotten to know them well enough to know you like them beyond an attraction by looks. So how do you get to know someone well enough to decide they are the only one you want to date? You need to hang out with them a lot and date but only for info gathering purposes at first. Dating does not necessarily mean a guy is committing only to you or you to him. this is why so many teen relationships break up. they commit first and make promises, then in a few dates, few months or just a couple months, its over cus one or both discovered enough things about the other that they didn't really like. We tend to want to have a few things in common, a meeting of minds, some personality stuff in common like both being extroverts. If one is an introvert and barely ever talks, it wont last for long.
All this said, you need to discover if he is attracted to you, and what is he attracted to. Looks? How about your smile, laugh or sense of humor, how you act, confident, self assured, always happy and outgoing? These are surface level things but all good reasons. However it cannot predict whether either of you will still be interested in each other after learning more about each other. The best way to learn tho is spending time together.
Now even if college age, few have figured this commited dating vs info gathering dating out yet.
It is I believe a big reason why guys are afraid to admit they like or are attracted to a girl because they fear she will expect instant commitment. Guys tend to want to date around, several gals until the day they finally meet one girl who stands out above and beyond all others to him. He is so captivated and wanting to learn more about her that he instantly stops seeing the other girls, He is making a decision to focus only on the one. She make believe he is committed totally to her at this stage but he has only just finally found someone who instead of just dating socially for a companion, he has found someone he really wants to get to know everything about because he's really feeling a strong drawing to her and wanting to know everything about her. this stage shouldn't take too long dependig on how often you talk and or meet. It can be just a handful of months and he's sure he wants to finally make a long term commitment to being bf/gf. So you might want to have a good talk with him. Tell him what you are looking for. You want someone your first attracted to visually and for the few things you can see and know without spending time with him. You let him know you feel that level of interest in him so far and ask if he has the same in return. Make it clear you aren't asking for a commitment yet and you will also be checking out other guys. But if once you know him better you decide he's the guy you want, you'll let him know. then either he feels the same and then makes a commitment to date only you, or lets you know he's not interested anymore and then he breaks it off and leaves you.
So far both of you are talking 'around' the subject but neither really saying anything that would reassure or encourage each other to take the next step of spending time getting to know each other. During this period, its fine to cuddle and kiss and hold hands, but I would caution to not become involved sexually until the both of you are at the point of committing in some way to be only with the other. Otherwise, theres a chance he will be having sex with any girl who is willing or foolish enough to not wait for a commitment. Even at this level, there's always a chance things may not work out later, but at least for the time being, there's mutual caring, feelings, love. This may not be a life long commitment like marriage so theres alwas a chnace of having a broken heart thats harder to overcome once intimate sexually. thats why I caution waiting a bit. No problem with sex before marriage. Just decide what it is you want in a guy before doing the exploring dating. You just may be breaking up with a few of your own choice before you really find one worth keeping.
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