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Why would he do this if he "likes" me?
I have feelings for my friend's brother, and her other sisters said he really liked me too. They always call him my boyfriend and tease him, but he is still underage (by 2 years) so haven't told anyone and decided when he turns 18, if I still had feelings, I would confess to him. The other night a girl came over to his sister's house (she lives by herself) and they stayed in his room for a long time, but my friend didn't really care. I have a feeling they did something among the sexual lines and I got upset and actually started crying. Later he came up to me when I was still upset and asked me what was wrong and he looked genuinely concerned. Of course I made something up and walked away from him. I can't be mad at him or her because she is closer to his age and I never expressed my feelings, but why would he so something with her if he liked me? It just makes me feel like maybe I wasn't worth it. Please and thank you
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
At a young age when many haven't even experienced sex for the first time yet, there is an allure, an interest, desire to know what it's like and if an opportunity presents itself and two people get carried away by the sensations of the moment, it is all too easy to temporarily block out, not purposely...someone else you are interested in, or yes, even a partner whether gf/bf, lover, or marriage mate. It takes a very strong will to resist or not even let your self stay in a situation that is ripe for that to happen.
Not sure I understood clearly who he is to you. I do get he's the brother of one of your friends and that others call him your bf in a teasing manner and the confusion comes when you stated "BUT my friend didn't really care." Who didn't care, the sister(your gf) of this guy you like, another girl there or the guy himself? If you are talking about him, then you just called him a friend but no where else did you put in that fact.
If he is a friend already, friends who really trust each other usually can confide in each other. You were unable to do so for fear of the age difference. The fact he picked up you were upset and wanted to know why was a perfect opportunity to share how you feel. Embarrassing? To some. But if you ever want a healthy relationship with a guy someday, hopefull a long term one, then you'll need to learn who you can trust and then once sure, open up and have very good conversation with, baring your soul and heart. A male partner in life is going to know way more about you in time than even your girlfriends or parents, etc.
Yes, he's 2 yrs younger. Once adults, thats no big deal. My husband in a year younger than me. The only issue is when it comes down to sex, if and 18 yr old has sex with a person under that age of sexual consent, and someone else reports it, there could be trouble for the older person. Two yrs as close friends without sex may be possible but if there is a strong chemistry between you both, I can't say that the two of you could hold off until he turns 18. You could still tell him why you were upset the other day. Since you really don't know if things would work out between you, if you are a match in personalities and otherwise, if would be safe to mention that too. such as: I know its presumptious of me to imagine that things could work out the way I picture it in my mind and my emotions got carried away at the get together when you spent lots of time alone in your room with 'so and so'. The reason it bothered me is that I have a deep interest in you and since I do, it upset me, wondering whats going on between you and her. I know I don't have a right to be but emotions are like that, unpredictable and dont always make sense. I haven't told you before aboaut how i feel because of you being 2 years younger and I don't want to cause trouble. I was initialing thinking I could wait for 2 yrs until you turned 18 to approach you and let you know of my feelings but I found out that I couldn't do so as easily as I thought. So I felt it best to let you know that its not something you intentionally did to hurt me. Something like this is a big compliment to the guy and who knows, maybe he was just being kind and this girl needed a listening ear or was making her moves on him and he just has no interest in her. He may be feelin the same about you and also not saying a thing due to the age difference. But the two of you will have to figure out what you want to do if both of you have a deep enough interest in each other. Thats your decision to make. Are you strong enough to take the teasing, heckling, and negative comments? Only you know. In a group setting it seems fine to have friends both older and younger than you, it only becomes an issue if nosy people go sniffing where its none of their business.
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