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humorist-workshop
I cut myself... I don't know what to do...
Hey, so I'm a 13 year old girl... I recently went to the doctor about depression... I'm going to get two types of counciling, but she hasn't scheduled an appointment for me yet... I tried this thing where you wrap a hairband around your wrist and flick it, it was fine ... More of a distraction and I could control when I wanted to stop or start, I didn't like the fact that it left red marks on my arms though... Two of my friends cut (that I know of) and I thought that it would be an okay idea to experiment, so I cut my leg multiple times, not deep or long... Just a scrape to draw a little blood... I know I have problems, and I'm not going to do this again (despite the fact that I want to). The two friends that I've mentioned know about this, and promised not to tell anyone unless it got really serious. I feel terrible because I promised my mum that I would never self harm- and I feel ashamed and I don't want to burden her with any more problems (she already has enough to deal with), the depression was hard enough to tell her about... I just don't know whether I should tell someone and I'm scared and lost and I feel alone... I was stupid I know, but I don't know what to do... Please someone tell me what to do, and don't bother asking why I did this- that is confidentual... Thanks, lea wills xxx
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Want to answer more questions in the Health & Fitness category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Health?
I spoke to a lot of young people who have gone through the same thing. Some, even younger. First, I would like to make this perfectly clear:
- They have their own reasons, some twisted, some perfectly normal, and all of them want the reasons to remain confidential.
- They were looking to feel something when they did it. No one actually knew what it was.
- All of them failed to see what they were looking for, and were just left with ugly scars.
- All of them regret what they did, but most of them want to do it again.
When I spoke to them in their one-on-one sessions, I have found something in common. And I do hope that this part would help you find light in whatever it is you're going through.
The common thing is that they don't know whether a problem at hand is for them to solve. They get affected by it. They want to solve it. Yet they can't seem to do just that.
And I will tell you the same thing that I have told them. Problems are as common as cold. Problems will always be there. And problems will always make you feel worthless.
However, you have to understand that problems, no matter how great, will always have a solution. Always.
Most of them asked me the same question: "Then why can't I solve this problem?"
To this, I answered:
There are only two types of problems that a person cannot solve. One, is not his or her problem. The other one, is not a problem.
You have to understand that what you're going through is pretty normal, and you have the ability to beat it. The mere fact that you wrote and sought for advice makes you one of the few people who are lucky enough to think before doing anything rash. You are already halfway in understanding why you feel the way you feel.
I am hoping you would find a person that you can talk to, a friend, or a family member, or a teacher. Someone who you think can keep a secret. And someone who will be able to enlighten you more about what you're going through.
Lastly, please don't feel alone. I know that's too much for me to ask. I had my share of feeling the same thing. But remember that we're only alone because we let ourselves be alone.
You seem to be a very smart person. I know you would get what I am trying to say. And thank you so much for opening up. It's a positive step.
Good luck.
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Lea,
I suffered from depression well into my adult years and never realized it as it was I guess you could say my normal. When I was finally diagnosed and given medication I was surprised and yes even more depressed when after a few days nothing happened, I was still they way I always was. I believe this is where you are at now.
The medication takes from three to four weeks to build up in your body before you will start to feel any different. Then slowly day by day the cloud, as I call it, of depression will lift and things will actually feel different. You dill feel different you will see things differently.
The medication replaces hormones that are either missing or in insufficient quantity to allow you to control yourself from getting more than what is considered normally depressed. Everyone gets depressed from time to time. Those of us that suffer from depression get deeper into a depression and have a hard time if at all getting out of a depressive state. This is what the medication does.
The therapy is to help you understand what brings you down and to recognize what triggers your depression and how to handle it by first discovering the trigger or triggers. This means you have to very open and trusting of the therapist most likely a psychologist. This is the person who is your new best friend that you can tell your deepest secrets too knowing they will never get leave that room. Everything you say in therapy is confidential. Not even your parents can be told.
When your therapist talks to your parents it is to tell them what the need or can do to help you between therapy visits. Of course what they are told to do to help you is based on what is learned during your therapy but never is what is said in anyway communicated to your parents.
The other therapist is most likely a psychiatrist who is a medical doctor who has written the prescriptions for your medications. You visits with this doctor are what is called MED checks. A chance for the doctor to evaluate if the medicine is helping and if necessary adjust your medication. Your family doctor has most likely referred you to the psychiatrist for medication as, no you not crazy, the chemicals you're lacking which are actually hormones are secreted into your brain. This makes the psychiatrist the most qualified doctor to prescribe medication for you.
This was how I was treated. My depression is now a thing of the past and I am a much happier person. Please don't try cutting again or anything else or worse. IF you feel you need to do something tell your mom or dad. If you are feel like hurting yourself call 911 that is what they are their for.
Hang in there give the medication time to work. You will feel better soon.
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Lea,
You're not alone. I understand what you are going through, I've done it myself. Its really hard to deal with life at your age. You have everything from boys to hormones working against you. Its really hard to be a teenager. People telling you what to do and how to be. I remember that age all to well. Everyone says it gets harder and adults are telling you that you're just throwing a pity party for yourself. And well with all that craziness going on I fell under the pressure and I cut myself too. But then I had my first child and I realized that someday I am going to have to explain the scars when my child comes to me and says "mommy what happened?" That day has not come yet but someday it will and I know that by telling them, I will risk them doing it to themselves. Dont think of yourself when youre doing this, think of the other people you hurt by hurting yourself. Like your family, or future children. You definately should tell your mom what has been going on. You need her right now and you wont be putting a burden on her you will make her happy for trusting her and going to her in your time of need! She is terrified right now knowing that her child is depressed and she cant do anything about it. If you open up to her and talk to her about what is going on and what you are doing it will help you and her get through this rough time. And as for your friends, you need to tell an adult so they can get help as well. They might get mad at you but just think you can be saving their lives. If you dont tell what if one of them cut too deep and kill themself? Do you want that on your consious? Be a good friend and help them too. You are so brave for talking the first step and admitting you have a problem! Keep it up dear its going to get better as long as you let it. Stay positive and keep your head up. Dont give up! Good luck feel better and if you need any more help please let me know!
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