|
I like a boy, I like him,how do i tell him? Should I tell him?
I'm a fourteen year old female girl. I happen to very much like one of my friends, Daniel, who is four years older than I. Some background information- the people I hang out with are mostly seniors in high school, and guys. I'm a freshman. We're all pretty nerdy- Nethack and Pokémon and Magic: The Gathering and Academic Team and science and math dominate most of our conversations. Understand I'm not some naïve little girl; my friends are all very honest, harmless guys. Don't let warnings of danger dominate your advice, please. Point of it is, I really like this guy, Daniel. He's ridiculously smart and taught me how to play Magic and introduced me to Nethack and his favorite band, which is now one of my favorites. The way he talks about things... he speaks as though he came from the eighteenth century at times, and then there's so much substance to the things he says. Riding home from academic team one day, I was watching him play Pixel Dungeon. He told me to sit next to me so I could watch easier, which I did, and I sort of just leaned against him the entire time. It was like half an hour, and I felt so warm and happy and vaguely sleepy and content, like I could stay there forever with no complaints. He refuses to cuss or say anything inappropriate. He's never had a girlfriend, he's very concerned with being polite. He's like a math genius, and he and I talk infinite geometric sequences and Nethack and music and stuff. He and I have things in common. Like... when explaining something, I'm often more lost in my own thoughts than talking to the other person. He does the same sort of thing. We both have a terrible work ethic and are always doing school work at the last second. People tend to be confused by either one of us easily. He's so funny and both gets and makes the sort of nerdy jokes I love. We both hate Pokémon and love Nethack and always use correct grammar. He's taken every math and science class offered at our high school, and I intend on doing the same. We both stay up way too late and fall asleep at inconvenient times throughout the day. We both speak quietly and don't cuss. I catch him looking at me if I'm talking to someone else near him sometimes, and we bring up things we talked about weeks ago throughout any conversation, and he always smiles and tries to make me laugh. I often can't help just looking deeply into his eyes, it's so easy to do, and I think he might look at me the same? At the very least, he always smiles. We text a lot, too. Always while playing Nethack, and one time with a showdown of "What's the next number I the Fibonacci sequence?" to 301, I won. Never before has he shown any interest in dating anyone, but he never says anything about anything like that. My little sister says he's asexual, but I don't think he is. I don't know.... what's the possibility that he likes me? Should I tell him I like him? How should I tell him?
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Since you've known him for a while and have spent time together already, logic would say that by now you would have a good idea if you like the person or not, and that means, by now he has had time to figure out how he feels about you. Considering you wont see him in school next year and he might be off to college elsewhere, you may not be seeing much of each other. Things change and it may be more difficult to keep in touch but if you both have discussed this beforehand, you can at least be determined to stay in touch and find times to visit, especially if you both really value each other's friendship. If there is a possibility of anything more like romance, it would feel pretty depressing to start down that path only to have his college years interfere if he's far enough away to come visit. It's future possibilities like this, including of course his being an adult and you by law not yet so defined that can land him in jail if some person were cruel enough to say something. If the two of you have never revealed your sexual preference, most mature people can figure that out without having sex, then you may want to cover that too so you don't give yourself a false hope for something more than may never be possible. I think you'd know if he was gay, it's the Asexuals that are harder to tell because they can become emotionally attached to a person, just not sexually, although some still do to an extent.
There's nothing wrong with maintaining your friendship until the time you turn 18 and then the both of you can move into the sexual phase of the relationship.
So start with a statement from you before straight out asking him. like: I enjoy you as a person very much. I value your friendship, in fact, I feel like you are my 'closest friend, or best friend.' Next year without you in high school will be very hard for me. So I am wondering exactly how you feel about me cus if you feel the same, I'd like to know what your plans are, if going to college or not and how we will keep in touch.
That should work.
People need compliments, affirmations, positive feedback. That includes close friends or for couples, one's mate.
Too often, we all assume a person can tell our feelings for them only by our actions. Actions do speak louder than words but actions and behavior can certainly lead a person to think one thing when it's actually another. However the words only without back up of actions/behavior, mean nothing.
]
More Questions: |