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humorist-workshop
I have low self esteem and its hurting me
I am a 17 year old girl, a senior in hs now and all through high school I have liked guys and everytime I have liked a guy I'd end up getting jealous at other girls they would talk to, and I would beat myself up for not being good enough for those guys and that I would never be able to compare to another girl, I'd never be number one if someone better came along. And I have grown tremendously learning that I am better than that and if they cannot see my worth then they are not worth my time...but I still have issues. I've been friends with this guys for more than a year now, and he is like my best friend. I have never thought of him more than a friend till recently, at the end of last year..and I have been convinced by other people and his behavior that he likes me too.. although I have been denying it and giving him every benefit of the doubt that hes just a nice boy lol. I used to be creeeped out at the thought of him liking me..and now thats just what I want. But I'm afraid if he doesnt like me im just going to get hurt and feel so stupid. And I have this gorgeous friend that he just started talking to and now I'm scared he is going to start liking her. And I just feel so bad about myself because its like I am never good enough and I know if he starts liking her its going to break my heart. And I just want to know why I can't just love myself and why I always have to go to guys to get attention and why I feel so damn shitty. I try loving myself and I do but then a guy comes along and treats another girl like he likes her or another girl thats better comes along and gets me worried and I just feel awful and I don't know what to do. sorry if this didnt make sense but please help ah
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Before you try dating, you need to learn to love yourself. Because you won't be happy in a relationship when you don't love yourself or have much confidence. The guy will get sick of having to always reassure you that the girl he talked to is just a friend and things like that.
Guys don't want a insecure, jealous girlfriend.
You need to accept your flaws, accept that you aren't perfect and you'll never be perfect. Then you need to learn to love yourself and everything about you.
Because believe it or not, there are girls out there who will lean on a guy and depend on them for their self worth. That if a guy doesn't like them, they'll start thinking worse of themselves. Or they depend on their boyfriend to give them self confidence.
You need to depend on you and only you.
Everyone has their moments where they feel insecure but you can't let it always be that way.
I used to be this way too. I always needed to be talking to a guy to feel good about myself. And if I didn't have a guy, I'd feel like crap. But I put an end to that and I'm happy and love myself.
Now I'm annoyed when girls get jealous of girls their boyfriend or crush is talking to. It's even worse when they start hating on that girl because she's pretty and starting hating on themselves.
So don't be like that, don't go chasing guys until you've built yourself up.
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Hey sweetie. I'm also a 17 year old girl, senior in HS. I've always been teased and taunted because I don't have the "perfect body", everything from not-so-big-breasts, to flat ass. I used to be so self-conscious that all I wore were skirts or dresses. My family would be part of that teasing, which I think made it worse. After I entered High School, I learned that guys care much for much more than we give them credit for. I don't need to have the perfect teeth, the perfect hair, the perfect body parts or the perfect walk to get someone to like me. And I've also learned to accept that there will always be someone better. It's not a bad thing to accept that, it's not that you think less of yourself but that you learn to not compete constantly. You should always take of yourself and try to look and be your best but you can't compare yourself to every other woman or you'll die of jealousy or envy. Yeah, this other friend of yours may be gorgeous but that doesn't mean he automatically likes her.
If you think he might like you, you should act right now. Tell him how you feel. Now I'm not saying he might not feel the same way, but if you do that now and he ever had some feelings for you he'll consider giving you a chance. Sometimes guys aren't sure we like them, so they move on. By telling him how you feel you lose nothing. If he likes you, great. If he doesn't, great. Why great? Because this way you can move on also. It's worst to just stay there, wondering what if or think about the wouldabeens, shouldabeens, couldabeens. It's better to get that out of the way and start loving yourself.
Best of luck!
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