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Is it wrong to only be attracted to men way older?
Hello, I am 15(Female)and I am only attracted to men that are 20 or older to like 40. I can not stand guys my age because they are so immature and they annoy me. I hate being single, but since it is illegal to date the men i am interested in I feel like there is something wrong with me. What do I do? Is it wrong?
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Girls often mature sooner than boys when it comes to relationships. It is not wrong to want to be with a mature guy. Unfortunately at your age, many guys are only just starting to date and have no idea what they are doing, same as you. A good majority of girls have a little more clue on relating to another person, they've been doing that with girlfriends for a long time, and the only thing they lack is understanding yet how a guys mind thinks and processes things so even females will have their own set of problems relating to guys, not out of immaturity but more out of lack of knowledge.
You can't hurry up a person's maturing because for all humans the real issue is the part of brain responsible for mature decision making isn't done growing in young people until we reach mid 20s to 30. So while the desire to date is there for you, it won't always be easy.
You state that you hate being single. Lets say you're 18 right now and you found a boyfriend to date starting tomorrow. Ask your self how that would improve your life, how that would make your life more fulfilling. You don't have to answer me, just understand yourself fully.
If having a guy is better than being single, then why? I do know that many are actually in love with the idea of dating more as a social status thing, and it's less about the guy and how you feel about him and whether he's perfect for you. That's why lots of people are in crappy relationships.
And dating should be a process of learning what it is you like and don't like about guys, so you can have a better idea about what kind of guy you're looking for in a life long relationship, but it rarely is. People go at dating for all other reason's but that one.
So what can you do until you turn 18 and are considered the age of consent to have sex...even if that's not the first thing you're going to do?
While you are waiting, start making a list, in a diary/journal or on a saved doc. on computer. The list should have notations of what it is you were attracted to in a particular guy, no matter what his age. The attraction process is a normal selective process of the human species. We see things we are attracted to visually in a guy, and also some surface level things we can pick up just from observing them in public.
Those things are the key things that will make a girl want to get to know a guy even better to see if he's the kind of person she might want to have a life long relationship with. this initial attraction doesnt mean the guy is actually mature under it all, or even right match for a girl, the attraction is only the bait, like the worm on the hook, to get two people willing to get to know each other better and that process is called dating.
You will form a list of traits and characteristics you like in a guy and those you don't like. You may refine your list many times as you grow older, and there'll be new revelations as you actually do date. the only real danger even you were 18 and wanting to date a guy 20 years or more older than you is that there is a very great chance that they are in a relationship or married with kids and not happy with their marriage anymore yet also unwilling to split up so they seek an outside relationship with another female. Some older guys going through their mid life crisis, want to try to recapture their youth and the best way they beleive they can is to find a young girl, 18 19, 20 who is prone to be more gullible and easy to dupe... and they say and do what they can to convince the girl they love her when all it is , is something self serving to them. It's not about being in love with the young gal, but just wanting any young gal to help them feel young again and they know that young girls are easy prey because they were once young immature guys themselves and they know some gals are tired of guys their age and want older ones. Keep that in mind dear.
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