|
2 guys like me- What do I do?!?!
Okay long story..
So I've always had a small crush on my best friends brother and I found out about a year ago that he likes me back. The problem is my friends all make fun that he likes me and they always tell me never to date him. So for the past year I haven't done anything about it and then I recently entered my first relationship with a guy I really like. (I'm 14) I thought all the stuff with the other guy was over, but it isnt. All his friends keep telling me he likes me and I see him almost every day. He's so sweet to me and always tells me things like "Hunter (my boyfriend) is a lucky guy" and "You look beautiful today"!! My boyfriend, however, is so shy that he never compliments me, has only held my hand once (We've been dating for 3 months) he never flirts with me or hugs me. We hang out a lot and I really really like him, but I dont know if I want to wait for him to make a "move." I really want to progress our relationship, but I don't want to scare him. I don't know what I should do about my best friend's brother either. Help me!!!
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
You are young and just starting the dating field. During the next 10 years or so, you will likely experience several other relationships. It's very few people who meet and date someone in middle school or high school who end up married to them later.
Dating is more about learning what you do and don't like in a guys character and the same for him. Its a time of making comparisons. Seeing what is lacking in a current partner that you would like to have, or something that they do, or ways they treat you that are disrespectful or hurtful emotionally or physically as in being abusive or violent. When you come up against things like that, you need to decide if you will settle for less or move on to the next dating partner, hopefully always shooting for someone a step better in some area. Along the way dear, please begin writing a list of what you come across that you like in a guy and don't like. As you grow older, some things about you may change and your list may change but this list will become very helpful as you keep reviewing it as it builds with your dating experiences and will help you to later recognize the right person to marry because you'll be consciously aware of what his character is like, regardless of his looks.
It is unfair to think that the way your current boyfriend is may never change. In some people its true, its a trait of how they'll be when they are older but it also may be something that we grow out of, improve on, learn to do better as we grow older. Who you are entering highschool and who you are leaving college most often is a vast difference in maturity and growth...we become different people.
At your point in age, the object is not to practice longevity of relationship, sticking together long term even if its not a perfect dating relationship. The object is not to prove to yourself or others that you can stick with someone long term...that comes in later years after you have a clue what kind of guy you want to end up life long with.
So with what I just shared, hopefully this helps you better to make a decision whether you will stay with the current boyfriend or whether you will give it more time, talk to him and tell him what you would like to see in the relationship and ask him to tell you what he'd like to see from you. If either request is something the two of you feel uncomfortable with or incapable of, then its time to break it off. If you don't feel able to be open and ask such questions, too chicken...eventually you'll learn communication is important in any dating relationship...but if you aren't ready to do so, then break it off and move on. But I would make it a point to work on communicating beyond a surface level on important things in any relationship.
I will say that in 3 months time, the guy should have finally got to a point of feeling comfortable with you that having such a conversation about needs and wants in the relationship should feel natural. He may just be scared to proceed due to his age and inexperience and fear of scaring you off. So let him know its something you want to see, the hugs and compliments and a kiss or two also.
Good luck dear.
]
First a tip with your boyfriend - you don't have to wait for him to make a move, you can make the first move. If you like the other guy more or are having feelings for him again, end things with your boyfriend and go for the other guy. Ignore your friends.
]
ok so you and your boyfriend have been dating for a few months now, first relationship. But- another guy likes you. Well, I would ask yourself. Do you like this guy? If so how much? Are you willing to end your relationship for him? I would make sure of where your feelings lie with both guys at this point.
Now let's talk about the boyfriend part.
I'm your age and I got into my first relationship this year. He and i liked each other for a while now, and i had NO idea when he was going to make a move. He seemed really interested, flirted with me and showed he really liked me. So i kissed him at a very sweet and nice time.
You say your boyfriend isn't being really warm, touchy. That can be a little troubling. I would talk to him. Ask him: Hey do you like where things in our relationship is? I would be honest, ask him if he really likes the relationship.
Just be honest and initiate the conversation. I hope things work out well, Good luck!!
]
More Questions: |