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Wedding Party
I am getting married next year. I have a big family and all my cousins are like siblings to me. Two of my cousins are bridesmaids and I have three younger cousins who I have asked to be my junior bridesmaids. My fiance has a smaller family and some of his family is not close with him. There are 6 nieces on his side that I have chosen to not be in the wedding. They are all girls and I am not close to them whatsoever. Although I feel bad..I feel like this is my day and I should choose what I want. My fiance understood but is still a little unsure of how this might play out. I am worried about how his family may react. We have already had some drama come from his side because of an engagement party and they have yet to apologize which is very upsetting to me. Should I speak to his family about their presence in the wedding or should I just wait until the day of the wedding for them to find out? I don't want drama and if they cause drama on my day I'm going to be extremely livid.
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Maybe give some free advice about: Families?
You are going to marry this guy, and these people are his family.
They deserve to hear from you both what the plans for the wedding are. Leaving it to the day of for them to find out basically guarantees that there will be drama. Don't do that. It's not kind.
Instead, let them know what the plans are in a calm, friendly way. If you present your plans for the bridal as though they are not a problem (and they aren't) then they are less likely to react badly. If you hide your plans, they are more likely to assume you intend to insult them and be upset. Simply tell them the truth - this isn't about them being your cousins - this is about you being close to these young women and counting them as your dear friends.
Don't start your marriage this way. I don't buy this "It's all about the bride" bullshit. That's a silly myth. The bride is important, but she is also the person who hosting all these other people at her special day, and she is owes to them to be a gracious host. A wedding is a celebration of family. These people may be assholes, but they are about to be family. You don't have to like them, but you will live a happier life if you are kind and respectful, even when they aren't.
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I would have your fiance speak to his family that is coming first, and put the past behind you on your big day because a bride DOES NOT need to be stressing the small things on her day. I am not saying his family is a small thing but drama is, but like i said have him speak with his family about drama and what not at the wedding if they keep running there mouth or keep the drama coming after he has spoken to them, more times than not they will start drama on the day of the wedding. I have a horrifying monster in law lol so i feel your pain and i know the hard decisions your facing. Good luck!
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