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Just need advice
(F18)
Hi I have been dating a great (m20) guy for a year and a half I don't know how to explain this very well, but Iv always wanted to have a boyfriend and now i realized its hard. I always have a strange feeling of wanting to text him but I feel like he's too busy even though he says it doesn't bother him plus he just plays video games and goes to work but it gets me kind of mad that he doesn't text back I guess its my fault I never text him back fast sometimes because I want to keep my mind busy instead of just waiting for his text. My boyfriend and I are always so close and clingy with each other we almost act like kids in love and I feel like that slows us down from spending time doing something cause it gets us too distracted and I feel like thats part of the reason he get me really attached to him. Don't get me wrong I love it but I don't want him to be in my head that deep in keeping me away from doing everything I have to get done. I just don't know,but I also think about it a lot and I don't like how To control the fact that he's that way. I guess I expect to much from him and I would explain small things he's done oh and he never tried to hurt me of any that sort he's just well kind of slow in common sense and it worries me he's like any other person but it takes a while for him to get something as it happens to me but less. his history with life at home has him thinking he can't be a smart person he over sleeps, takes anti depressing pills forced by parents, goes to the bathroom every 30 to 40mins when hanging out, works at a job I helped him get, he doesn't have a future in mind except with me,I don't know I love him but I don know why I feel like breaking up the last time I did was when I actually did because we were distant cause I was going to through stuff and his mom called me to ask why I wasn't with him and got back together with him even though I did miss him but at the same time I didn't but this was a day break up thing we didn't last broken up
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You've expressed quite a few different feelings so I'm going to try to address them all. First off, I think you mean well and your genuine nature is persuading you to stay with him. I know how that feels because I'm the same way. It takes a lot of time to think about but if you are unhappy as you seem to be, perhaps the best thing for you is to break it off with him. I was held back by an ex boyfriend and there are times when I regret having ever dated him. The person you are dating should inspire you and challenge you to be the best that you can be.. it is clear that he is instead holding you back. There's a quote I live by that I really think pertains to your situation:
"It's true we don't know what we have until it's gone, but it's also true we don't know what we are missing until it arrives."
In other words, in my opinion (which you in no means have to take personally) I believe there is so much more waiting for you that has yet to be discovered. Anyone that slows you down is keeping you from truly experiencing life. 18 is the best age because you really start to shape as a woman and start following the path of life that you chose with every decision and activity you partake in.
Even if you decide to stay with your current boyfriend, remember that it is okay to express how you feel to him. To avoid waiting for his texts, I encourage you to set a time where you can talk on the phone with each other everyday. Say it's right before dinner, when you wake up etc whenever is most convenient. This way you don't need to keep checking your phone or wondering if he has sent you a text message. Good luck!! This was lengthy but I hope it helps.
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It doesnt seem like your too happy in this relationship and if thats true then you should end it. You two are still young and this is expected but you shouldnt feel super attached and dependent on each other either. Personally I feel that if your not completely satisfied in this relationship that you end it.
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