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confused?
I got your reply to my husband watching porn and lying to me.. the thing is that I have approached it from that angle.. I have told him that instead of hiding it from me and then lying to me just be honest to me and I have even told him that maybe one time we could watch it together.. his answer when one night we came across a porn movie on the tv was that it would be embarrassing to watch it with me. seriously? I am his wife! sure, maybe it is a personal thing.. but why after so many times I have told him to just tell me that he doesn't have to hide it from me or lie to me does he continue to so so? and I understand where you are coming from.. and when he is confronted about porn or anything else in general.. he gets angry and denies anything and everything.. and then tries to turn the situation on me sometimes.. its like he thinks he never does anything wrong.. just the other night he was well drunk.. we were at a friends house drinking earlier and we went home and he started being mean and rude and saying hurtful things (and no he doesn't usually get that way when he drinks) and then after awhile he started throwing up and then got really emotional and apologizing and saying he doesn't wanna lose me and how much he loves me.. if that is the case then how come he treats me that way? and also, I do not go through his phone! there are just times that I come across the porn not thinking I was gonna come across it.. it just happened.. there are also times when he is confronted by things that he will just walk away/leave and then come back thinking and acting like nothing happened! and im sorry but im the type of person that if we are fighting you cant just walk away and then come back thinking everything is fine! im the type of person that if something happens I gotta talk to you about it or else it wont get resolved or whatever you wanna call it.. he is also the type of person that does not talk about his feelings or about how he feels or anything related to that! sometimes I have to practically beat it out of him to get some kind of answer or anything. and I kind of hate it because it makes it harder on me! lately yes, I have noticed that there are times that I can tell that he is trying a little.. but other than that its like im getting nowhere! I know that my husband loves me..and I love him with all my heart and then some.. but after everything that has happened in the past and some stuff that still continues to happen just makes everything a lot harder stressful on me! and yes, I do find porn disgusting.. why would anyone wanna sit there and watch random people have sex? its gross personally.. but like I have said.. my main thing is the lies and the hiding tuff from me.. it just makes me wonder what else he could be hiding from me?!?!?!?!?!?!? thank u for your help! yes, I have told you that I have watched it in the past.. but maybe once or twice years before I even met my husband.. and he knows that he can watch it with me because maybe 3 months ago we watched one together.. but he still continues to lie and hide it from me.. maybe ill never know.. maybe he will never stop.. but is it seriously something that I can just get used to or overlook?
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
I beleive you answer is in the last line of what you have written. Either that or some form of counseling for the two of you.
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