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PROBLEM ALERT :(:(:(
Okay so I like 2 people both of whom are with other and are both my friends I like this girl and this girl. the girl is my best mate and so is the dude but I love the girl more I just feel like sitting and crying all the time because the person she's with doesn't love her and its a crisis coz she deserves more and I just can't get over it. No matter how hard I try it don't go away and it hurts so much seeing her with someone who don't deserve her and the guy I can kinda live with out but I still like him what do I do?
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Just want to clarify cus this idea came up as i read your words. Is it Love as just a friend for your girlfriend or are you possibly bi and its more about her being with someone else, not you and you think you can do a better job than the guy? Even tho he is also a friend.
You don't have to answer, I am just trying to draw your attention to the possibility that this may be why it is affecting you so hard.
There's a matter of how you happen to know the guy doesn't love her or whether he has ever professed to love her. If he has never said so, then he is doing nothing wrong. If he is pretending for her sake that he loves her but he does not, then he is being false with her and that is not right. Depending on how long theyve been hanging out, they could be still at the attraction stage or finding more things out about each other so they are progressing to the "liking each other stage" and eventually some time in the future, that can grow into love. So love doesnt necessarily have to be present, just truthfulness and open communication and sharing if any feelings change. Your two friends are going to have to discover for themselves where their relationship is at and whether it is good to continue or not. You cant say anything to either one. Just be there ready as a support if she needs a shoulder to cry on if they break up. Lots of your own best learning was not from following moms rules and warnings when she said, "Dont do this or don't do that. If your mom told you tomorrow that she is seeing something in a friend of yours that makes the warning bells go off for her and she's concerned for your safety, and wants you to stop seeing them? Would you? Probably not. If she was right and you ended up in a bad situation with a so called friend and really hurt and dont see them anymore, you might now have a better idea of what that kind of personality flaw looks like so you can spot it yourself early on next time around cus mama's not always gonna be at your side to help you and neither can you always be there to help your friend see what she needs to see. The time it takes someone to see the problem can vary between people, with some figuring out after a couple weeks, a few months, and for some, it takes years.
During that time, just pray for them to see the light.
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