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I feel empty.
I am 21/f and I moved in with Tim 26/m last march. We had known each other about a year previous and both happen to be looking for roommates around the same time. Anyways, for awhile things were messy because we wound up sleeping together a few times but we became very close friends. We talk about everything and trust each other deeply, even when we decided to not have sex anymore. Anyways, he accepted a job out of state recently and just left about 30 minutes ago. He's going to be back in a few months but we are officially not living together anymore. In march I move back in with my parents. It was a very sad goodbye and I still can't stop crying. I've been anxious about him leaving for weeks now and I'm so depressed. The last time I can remember being this upset about something was when my first boyfriend broke up with me when I was still a teenager. I feel broken and empty and all those other emo analogies. My friends are here for me but I still feel a void. I know things get easy over time but how can I speed up the grieving process?
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This is a question asked of many psychologists and psychiatrists. Their answers is the same. Grief has to run its course and everyone grieves differently. Grief has many different stages as well. Depending on the hurt and how you handle grief you may have to go through all of them before you feel better.
Right now the hurt is fresh and raw and the way you feel is normal. My wife would tell you to have yourself a good pity party. Get out the box of chocolate ice cream and indulge yourself for a day or two. Then pull yourself together and start to move forward.
The hurt will stay with you for a while. It sounds like you had a good relationship with him and maybe in your own way you loved him. The empty feeling will pass as find other things and people to fill the void.
I know you are moving back in with your parents for economical reasons. I might suggest for the next month and a half you look to see if you cannot find someone else, possible a girlfriend or co worker who can move in a pay half the rent. Moving back in with mom and dad is going to slow the healing process or slow whatever gains you make in healing between now and then.
Having your own place gives you your privacy so that when he does return you can see if he is still the guy that walked away.
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