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Aways feeling tired and crabby
20/f
For the past year probably, I've been feeling so bad. Crabby, tired, upset, don't care... just overall in a bad mood. I think a few things could have led to this, such as a break up with someone I really cared about or not doing as well as I wanted in school. I just really don't know what to do about it anymore. Its gotten to the point where I just don't care about anything anymore. I've been playing soccer for about 10 years and recently I just quit my college team because I'm not happy. My parents said it is really unusual that I'd quit this sport because when I was younger I was in love with it.
I'm currently in a relationship now, been dating for a month. It's going well but I guess I've just given up on hope that I will find the right man for me. Sometimes I can just feel myself getting crabby or irritated for no reason with him. Then some times he will do something like lie to me and usually I would get upset but now I just don't even care.
I always feel tired. I've been getting about 8-9 hours of sleep every night but all throughout the day I just feel soo exhausted and lazy. It just makes me sad because 2 years ago I would be so happy about this awesome fall weather and going to football games etc. I had mono when I was 14 and this kind of feels similar, but I don't think I have it again.
I just really want some advice on how to start feeling better again. I've tried getting more sleep on the weekends but I still feel so crappy and lazy. I went on a bike ride yesterday and that sort of helped only for a little bit. Can anybody help me?
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I'm not a doctor but from what you have read this seems to be depression. Any time you can't function and have lost interest in usual life and activities it's a sign.
You might also be experiencing a medical issue with chronic fatigue. What you should do is see your doctor and mention everything in your above letter and get guidance on correcting what's wrong.
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The bike ride helped a little and theres a reason for it, but you are so seriously drained of the "happy" hormone levels in your brain that you can't function right.
The crabby irritated feeling can be related. I'm no psychiatrist or professional but I know what has worked for me, daughters and some friends. I have heard it discussed as two different subjects, one being the 'raising of your vibrational energy' which sounds new agey but it is for real. and the other is raising the levels of the neuro transmitters (NT's) in your brain which produce the hormones needed for us to function well.(Oxytocin,serotonin for example) When it is seriously low due to stress, things like a break up or death in family, loss of job, money related problems, our hormone levels get all used up faster and if we arent putting more in, we' are basically running on empty. A person who does not feed their body Food, the fuel it needs to function, it will slowly over time become emaciated.
Your brain requires these hormones to always be at top levels and it need DAILY deposits towards the stock of NT's to keep functioning well.
There are always going to be people who are born with bodies that lack the ability to create their own and they need to take prescriptions of manufactured versions of the real thing, anti depression meds. For one of my daughters, that is the case. Another daughter was overwhelmed with being dumped, 3 times so for, job used to be part time, financial troubles, etc.. and she became very depressed. After 6 months of not caring about anything anymore and ready to give up, she asked me what to do, I told her. She did not try it. Instead she took her one free visit the employers cover to see a counselor. The guy knowing she couldn't come in for regular visits, told her what she could do to get back to normal, it was the same stuff I told her. She does not have a malfunction in her brains ability to create these NT's, they just were seriously depleted. Is it a one time do it and be fixed? No, it's a new routine you have to incorporate into your life, getting to know your body and know how you feel so that at the slightest change, before you hit where youre at now, you can already start measures to up those NT levels.
Movement/physical activity most often mentioned are running, jogging, dancing, exercise. No one hardly mentions quality sexual activity..that is also a stress reducer because it releases the needed hormones. I like skipping because it makes me feel silly and like a kid again and I cant do it without laughing.
That brings me to the next remedy: Laughter. Easiest way to get laughing when you don't feel like it is to watch a seriously funny comedian on the net or a funny movie. They don't say the laughter is good medicine for nothing.
Another is singing. Sing along to the songs. If you don't know the words, just do the melody.
Along with singing come listening to tunes that is uplifting to you. Its not the words here that are key but the melody. You are going for the tunes that before you got to this state, were the kind of melodies that made your soul or your heart feel so light and bouyant in your chest as if it was going to float away. For me, one melody that does it is the song Clocks by Coldplay. There are others but thats a good example.
And lastly, hugging... REAL hugging, not the loose- quick -nervous-pat-on-the-shoulder-included hug that lasts 2 seconds. I am talking about the long lasting bear hug. There are articles on line about the subject of just hug therapy. You cant give one without getting one in return. This also seriously raises serotonin and other hormones levels. They do recommend on some articles no less than 8 hugs a day. Most people don't even get one. I am sure you can see the problem. All this is like your daily vitamins you need to take. When you begin to slack off you risk getting into a funk again or if stressful things come along, then falling into depression again. Give this all a try and write me again at my column and let me know how it is working for you. In the meanwhile, do keep getting the extra sleep cus it does help some while you're in the process of trying to get better.
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