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How can I get him to give me a change?
I dated a guy for 7 months. We had good times and a good connection.
He's in 3 music bands and had been busy lately but he still wanted to spend time 2gether. Then we stopped talking as much and there was some tention between us which i think both of us ignored. One day he broke up. He said maybe we should date others and he did'nt feel the same as b4. Anyways, I always had a problem with saying "no" to things he asked for and I thought I was always right in arguments. I used to say sorry but never with a genuine intention of changing. Now I realize how I've been. I am very self centered and I never noticed. Now I'm ready to talk and apologize. But how can I even start talking to him!?
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It is good that you finally see what you have been doing wrong. Thats a great start. I remember when one of my daughters couple years ago realized what she was doing wrong after reading Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus. There's even more than what the book shares but she was off to a good start...hoping she could get her boyfriend re-interested in her. The problem wasn't entirely her actions. I could clearly see what he was doing wrong too but she couldn't. They were not a right match for each other to begin with. And it ended quickly.
It was just 7 mos. which may seem like a long time, but in a relationship, it really is a short time, not enough time to get past the NRE, new relationship energy that makes everything super intense and great, but that levels out after a few month or 6 mos or so. When that happens, you know what you are really left with. True, he may not have liked some things about your behavior but I am willing to bet he has things he does which are not the best thing for a relationship. Ask any woman who has a workaholic husband if she is satisfied in her marriage if she still loves him, and the answer will be no. Trying to be in 3 different bands at once is quite a stretch for his time and he is choosing all 3 over you, putting you last. Even if you have never done any of the things you had, there's a chance that he still would put you last. Are you really sure you want to try to get him back? Maybe thats part of what you need to experience and learn still. Experience is a good teacher. If you are determined to get back together, you can call him and talk. Or write to him on FB or text. He may see it eventually if he takes a break from music. He may respond, and he may not. If he doesn't move on. If I were you, I would go find some find to read self help books about relationships and learn more about what makes a woman a great partner and what to look for in a guy. Good luck
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