I simply don't understand my boyfriend's mom. Why is she acting like this?
Question Posted Friday January 4 2013, 5:04 am
18,female
I've been dating this guy for nearly a year and a half. We have a great relationship. But what really bugs me is his mother. Now,I'm not stuck up or arrogant or whatever,but almost every adult I met says I'm a genius. I'm a graduate of Medical school and aiming to be a doctor someday. I'm one of the best students in my school. So yeah,I've got brains. And I've been recognized for that. But she,his mother,is the only one who thinks otherwise. Not just that,she never misses any opportunity to indirectly insult me. In a way that I can't exactly call an insult,but it's still pretty obvious. I'm really good at pretty much anything I set my mind to. And if I don't know something,it's because it doesn't interest me. Yet she always implies that I'm uneducated. She never even finished college and is unemployed,so if she's so educated and all,why didn't she? I have NEVER done anything to cause this behaviour of hers. If anything,I have always been really nice to her. What is her problem? Maybe someone can explain to me,because I just don't understand.
Cutee answered Friday January 4 2013, 10:35 am: Maybe she likes you,or she is testing you for the other step.I think she wants to see your reaction.Lol. [ Cutee's advice column | Ask Cutee A Question ]
orphans answered Friday January 4 2013, 8:42 am: Hello!
Often, this is almost just jealousy from the mother. If your boyfriend has been close with his mother, or if she 'mothers' him, she may think you're 'taking him away from her', and that you're 'not good enough'. That's because often, no one will be good enough for her baby. You can try a few things:
1. Speak to your boyfriend, and see if he's noticed it. Is this just the way she behaves? What does he think you should do?
2. Speak to her. This will be awkward, but it may be necessary. Be careful though - if it gets unpleasant, your boyfriend may feel the need to choose between you two.
3. Spend some quality time with her. Get her to like you by doing things you both enjoy. Go out to lunch. Go shopping. Go watch a film. Something, where just the two of you can spend time together, talk, and just relax. Maybe, she will say something about how she feels.
But yes, they are the 3 obvious choices for you. I think the 3rd is the best.
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