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Girlfriend of 1 year doesn't really beleive me when I say I love her
Hi,
I've been going out with my girfriend for just over a year now and I love her so much, sometimes it hurts. I know that I would do anything for her. A few months ago (maybe 3-4) I started saying "I love you" to her, and she says it back. I can really describe how much those words mean to me when she says them (she sometimes says it first).
BUT there are a few times when I feel like she doen't really believe or see how much she means to me.
- she'll say "Im fat/ugly/etc" (she's not btw) and then when I try to encourage her otherwise, I can tell she doesn't believe me.
- id I give her a compliment, "I like you dress", "you're beautiful" etc, she gets this funny little look like she thinks im lying or 'just saying it' without really meaning it
- a few of times shes said something like "what happens when you get tired of me and go to some one else" this one really hurts. It hurts one hell of a lot, because I love her so much. Honestly, not once since I've been with her have I ever considered leaving her, or being with someone else and I KNOW that I will never 'go behind her back'. I reasurred her, and told her how much she means to me and that I would never leave her for someone else etc etc, and yet she said it again...
- she's also said "how do you know you're in love with me if I'm your first...you probably only *think* love me because Im your first." This one is like a kick in the gut too. Yes, I've never been with anyone else, but that was deliberate because I didnt want to get into a "superficial" relationship.
I'm afraid that she doesn't believe or see how much she really means to me, and I'm afraid that this will lead to her eventually leaving me. Having never been in a relationsip before, I feel completly helpless as to what to say or do to show how I feel. I've tried as best as I know how, but clearly it's not enough.
PS. Im 20 and she's 22
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
ok im 13 and yes im a girl. she may associate some things you said with past relationships (not saying anything negative bout you or her), like her ex could have said things like that, and could have cheated, used her, abused her, called her the opposite of those things, etc. since this is your first "real" relationship with a woman, its ok to feel helpless. keep telling her those things, and try your best to show it by, bragging on her in public, compliminting her in public,etc. you should ask your friends and family about advice too.
Good Luck! :)
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