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Help: How do I get my mom to trust me alone with my boyfriend?
13/f
Okaay, so me(13/f) and my boyfriend(13/m) had plans to go downtown today. my mom was on board with it yesterday. And today when i went to ask her she said no. she says its because she doesnt know my boyfriend...but i think its because she doesnt trust me. i've been downtown with friends before. and i want her to be able to trust me. I've never done anything for her not to trust me. so why now? its not because she doesnt know my boyfriend because she could just meet him, when she dropped me off. this is ridiculous. she's never going to learn to trust me if she doesnt let me try something new. how do i get her to trust me and do more with my boyfriend?
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is this your first boyfriend? because you are just 13 your mom might not be ready she cant get a good read on a guy in a few seconds, your friends im sure they been to your house and so forth what is wrong with this generation trying to grow up so fas when i was 13 i didnt go anywhere unless another parent was with our group
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I understand your frustration. She's not trying to ruin your life here. She trusts you but maybe not him and wants to know where he is coming from before she sends you off together.
That much is reasonable. She can't get a good read on him in a split second meeting when she drops you off. Here's what I would do. Be mature about this and no whining, backtalk etc. and ask her why she doesn't want you to be alone with him when she said at first you could go.
Next tell her you want to set up a dinner with him and his parents so she can meet them. I think after that she will be more comfortable. She's only trying to protect you and perhaps wasn't ready to deal with you dating boys this early.
You can't convince anyone of anything especially wen it comes to trust. By observing her rules and showing consistently that you are trustworthy she will see it and grant you the ability to be independent and make choices about boys.
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