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Is he a player or a lover (kinda long sorry)
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(im a girl and Im 13. My boyfriends 14)
So Im dating this guy and he dumped his ex for me. Which is kinda cute yet kinda mean and scary. So its only been one day weve been dating and I want to trust him. His ex keeps telling me (and a whole lot of people) oh dont date him he's a player and he dumped ____ for me and dumped me for you and now who will be next? and all this non sence. But, I have only known him for 2 weeks. He said I was cute the first day we met while he was dting his ex and I said arnt you dating ____ and he said yes but, its not cheating. Im just calling you cute. and we passed notes all the time and payed 21 questions or would you rather. He said I seemed like a really nice person. He also told me he was gonna break up with his ex due to shes so emotinal and getting her friends to ask him questions. Than like on a thursday his ex came up to me and said people are saying your flirting with my bf. THAN right after that he broke up with her and I didnt even know until the next day. I saw him later that other day out of school but, never spoke to him. Than in 2nd period (the only class we have together)
He asked me if I liked him. course I said yes and he asked me out after class. We hugged than went seprate ways to classes. We sat together at lunch and him and his buddy were making fun of his ex's name (it is kinda... weird) but, I was like *is he going to do that to me?* but I didn't say anything. Than after school we met up & I waited for him at his locker and once he was finished we started walking together.
he was so sweet and asked me, "Hey can i carry your books for you?" and I said yes. Than some 6th graders were in front of us (were in 8th) and he was like " move dammit" than the girl was like asshole and of course I laughed. It was funny. I think he was just trying to make me laugh. But, after I was still laughing and I was like, "your mean." and he just smiled back, "kinda ahaha." so were walking still just chatting and he asked, "so wheres your bus?" I poined and said right there."
He walked me and slowed down about 10 feet away from the bus and leaned over and kinda whispered, "do you mind if I kiss you goodbye?" and of course this is like the most sweetest thing ever that he would ask me that. So I said yes and we kissed. Just a long like 5 second kiss. No tounge just lip. I said bye and smiled my whole way home.
I got dressed up on friday for him but, forgot he wasn't going to be here. He was going to be in court. yes, court. For family issues I believe but, before we started dating he told me he went to court on monday for being caught with alchohl. and No that doesn't scare me or anything because I have had plenty of friends like that who under age drink but, i dont. I said okay and we went on. He sounded kinda shy like he didn't want to tak about it so I said okay and respected his privacy.
But, is he a player or not? His ex said he had a note about me that he said something about how he just wanted to hurt her and date me to do so cause she would care but than my friend kept a note from him that said why he broke up with his ex and because she was really emotinal and thats why (I explained more in the beggining)
So is he? I wanna believe he isn't but I dont know. And he has this best friend where he acts kinda diffrent around me when hes alone. And not by much but he kinda acts like all guyish. (you know, "hey ______ you have a big butt.) Thy said that to me but than i was like thats kinda insulting and he said no its a compliment. Its good. and I was all like sure whatever. and really didn't care. i was suprised cause i really dont have a big butt but whatever.
So please tell me if hes either or and explain why. thanks for reading all of this.
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Hi there!
Wow, the fact that you actually question his actions just shows how intelligent you are! I'm glad you asked this question. Here's the thing, I get that you're 13 and you want to experience dating and all that but at this age, you cannot take it so seriously, especially from guys (I know it's hard to believe when you're the one going through it). Anyway, I don't really like how you mentioned your 14 year old "boyfriend". Clearly, from what you said, he has problems already, on his own, with the alcohol case and whatnot. You might have many friends who drink and are underage, but the fact that your "boyfriend" got caught with it, means he was drinking at a place where he should not have been. He should have been smarter than that. And why does he drink in the first place? Why are any of your friends drinking in the first place? To seem cool? I like that you drink, you're very smart for that. I feel like part of the reason why he drinks is because of his family issues. He might not be ready to talk about stuff like that with anyone, but if you can get through to him then maybe he will hold you higher than the other girls he's dated. Anyway, you can't just break up with a girl for a next girl in a matter of a day. That means he didnt really like his ex to begin with. It seems like he's just having girlfriends to show off to his friends that he can get girls. Yeah, he might be attractive, but if his ex says he did the same to her, chances are, it's true. And complimenting on how big your butt is, is quite disgusting. And his friends shouldn't even be "complimenting" you in that way. That is a lack of respect right there. Anyway, please be careful about him. The next girl is probably just waiting in line for her turn. This is my honest opinion. Im really sorry.
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Ok well first off, dont appologize for the length of your question because I do the same thing all the time. Ive had a similar boyfriend before and he was the player type and I didnt belieeve my friends or his ex's because everyone kept telling me he would hurt me and he did. All he liked me for was my boobs and my looks and butt.
Having a big butt to a guy is a compliment but to a girl saying it to another girl it is not. I dont know why that works that way but it does. I think he is a player and eventually once he gets what he wants from you (your heart, boobs, butt, lips, and possibly sex), he will hurt you. Im not saying to break up with him right away but just think, is this the type of guy you really wanna be with? I mean of course he is funny and nice and calls you cute but soon I think that he will only want you for the stuff I listed above.
Sorry, I dont want to be the one to break the bad news to you but its true that he is the player type. You cant expect him to change either, he will say cute things to you then hurt you (known from personal experience). Just be careful with this guy, make sure you know everything about him and his past girl friends before you do anything with him or break up with him. I know you dont wanna be called mean names by him and his friends if you guys break up but it will eventually go away. If I were you, I would kinda wanna know why he was going to court.
If he acts differently around you than with his friends, then that practically means he's two faced. What you need to do is find out which face is real and which is a lie.
Hope this helps!
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