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I absolutely feel like suicide is my only option
I'm sitting in my truck wishing I had a vacuum hose that I could run from the tail pipe to the cab of my truck, while my sister is up in the hotel room smoking crack. She told me I had to leave so because she sick of me getting high for free. Yes I am an addict with very bad habits and I actually let my sister sell herself to support our habits. I am a complete piece of shit and I can't live with myself anymore. I am 31 years old and my sister is 22 and I am not doing my job as being an older brother and protecting her from harms way. We are both very addicted to opiates,
and crack cocaine. We moved from Ohio to Florida the end of April this year so I could start work with a marine construction company. It didn't take me barely 2 months to screw that up and catch a grand theft charge for attempting to steal all the tools that were provided for me to
run a crew of my own. The drugs really took hold
of me at that point. Now I'm completely at the end of my rope, bottom of the barrel
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Oh sweetheart, suicide is NOT the only option. There are so many ways you can get away, and escape from the hold of drugs and whatever happened before in your life.
Someone already mentioned about going into a rehabilitation center or some sort of support group to help you break away from those drug habits. I think that would be the best idea.
Seek professional help because the people are trained and it is their job to solely focus on you and helping you getting rid of your addiction.
They will be the best in guiding you.
The fact that you realize and admit you have a problem is a huge step in reversing your habit, so don't think it is the end of the line for you. You've made a big step in searching for help, and realizing that you have an addiction. It's a big milestone!
Do a quick google search for rehabilitation center or a support group in your area.
Also, I would also tell you to keep yourself busy on other things and watch the company you are going to surround yourself with. It's easier to fall back into drug-use habits when you may be around anyone, any friends that are using drugs.
I really hope you do choose to get help. It'll be the best for you. I wish for the best and I do believe you can get past this! :)
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Have you ever considered checking into rehab? There are other options besides suicide. If you really wish to end this problem, get the proper help and care you NEED to get. It will be hard at first, but in time, I'm sure you'll be happy and feel much better. Despite what some may say, 31 is not too old to turn your life around and make yourself better. I know several people who thought they couldn't quit, and they did. My current boyfriend use to be an addict, but he quit and is doing wonderfully. I believe you can get better too, you just have to believe it yourself as well.
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