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i want to know wheather i am right or wrong
i am a female and 24 yrs old. i am in a relationship with a boy from last one and a half yr. he was my classmate and we were very good friends for two yrs.the problem is that guy i love was into a relationship before we met...and that relationship was going well. i was secretly in luv with him during our studies bt never let him know about it...but later on aftr one and a half year he jst realised it that i loved him. i don't know how bt he also started liking me. we knew dat we like each other but didn't talked much about it because he was already committed to someone else. when he got job after studies and we departed.. he called me on phone and cried that he loves me alot and cannot live without me...i also luved him but told him that he must not ditch the girl he has in his life but he said that if he marries her...he won't be able to live happy himself and also wont be able to keep her happy either...since then we are together and i realised that he was not wrong..he truely loves me...and it took some time for him to move away from that girl which was painful for him and for me too. i know most of our friends are going to blame me for this but if i am going to leave him or if i would have left him in between he would have died. i want to know that whatever we did...was it right or we were wrong???? what else i could have done to sort out this problem? i really need your advice because this is something i cannot share with someone else
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I'll be honest, he doesn't sound like a very emotionally stable or mature guy. In fact, he sounds emotionally manipulative. It is not your responsibility to "keep him alive" by being his emotional and romantic crutch. It may actually be a good thing for his former girlfriend that he moved on. Anyway, the past is the past and now you two are together. I'd say take it slow and easy, though. What if he meets some other girl he "can't live without?" Only you are married or have children by then? I don't think he understands how happiness in relationships works, so I'm not very optimistic about the long-term prospects of your relationship. Maybe I'm wrong, and in some ways I hope I am. All I'm saying is take care.
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You did not interfere with his current relationship and were considerate of others feelings. You've done nothing wrong.
However, I am going to say that it was cowardly on his behalf to go as far as dragging possible marriage into it. If he isn't happy and wants to be with you then he should have the balls to tell that to his girlfriend. Instead he called you up stating that if he marries her that he wouldn't be happy. Nobody is forcing him to get married, Nobody is forcing him to be in a relationship he is not happy in.
On a second note too you, I would never date someone fresh out of a relationship. You want to make sure he is over her first and not dating you while he has feelings for someone else. Although he may insist he has moved on it's better to stay on the side lines and let the air clear between the two of them. I would probably remain friends for a few months and then once he's truly moved on then I'd take it slow.
If your friends blame you then let them think whatever they want. It is frankly not their business.
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