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Why am I afraid to date interracially when I don't think it's bad?
It's like, there's still a part of me that worries about what society thinks. I'm black and like how I look, and who I am, and like this white guy, but a part of me feels embarrassed by it, and idk why. I'm attracted to guys with similar interests (regardless of culture), who are attractive, so I've crushed on guys from all over. I see us as all humans, and support love (whether it's with another guy of my culture or out) in general, and aren't racist at all, so why do I feel this way?
I think this is something that prevents me from getting into relationships. I'm 17 and have never been with anyone, and I feel like I have issues letting people getting close to me, because I'm afraid of rejection (and afraid of someone else being racist, when it's not like i'm ugly or anything, tbh). So I kind of shut them off early, even if I had a great connection with them before. And then I also fear possibly getting into a relationship, like how society would view it, if it's "unconventional". and in general, just like the idea of being in a relationship and showing PDA freaks me out. But if I'm with someone I really like why should I care what society thinks? Why do I feel this way when I know it is irrational? I know better, and yet my heart is afraid.
This is just complicated, and frustrating, please help
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A lot of people make decisions taking into account what others will think about them, so it's somewhat normal but it can keep you from being happy. Like in your situation you like a boy who has a different skin color; in my society nobody and I mean NOBODY cares about skin color except for maybe the older people who are a little prejudice about black people, and even then that population here is almost non existent. I've heard that up north ( I live on the boarder of Mexico in Texas) people can be really racist towards us (Hispanics) and black people so I guess it's different. Even then it wouldn't have stopped me from asking my ex to be my girlfriend (who was white) or in the future if I like a black girl it won't either. The things people say don't bother me; skin color is only one thing to say something about. I know you don't know this since you've never really been with someone but your family and friends are going to say something you don't like about the other person eventually. Even if he's black they're Going to pick out the things they dont like about him and it's going to annoy you
My advice is to not let color get in the way of you being happy and try to not let what other people say keep you from living your life the way you want to, it's only going to keep you from being happy and in this case you might miss out on someone special
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If you are considering this that MAN DESERVES A WOMAN WHO IS CONFIDENT AND SECURE. You also deserve to love who you want. Your life is soo short stand up and be a woman give him your all work that chocolate skin!! Show him what you are all about. Never allow anyone to tell you who is best for you. They are probably extremly miserable and they will love to bring you in as their company. Keep him chasing you mama! Practice going out with him first as friends and then work your way up the relationship ladder. Trust me you will see that it makes an easier transition. Allow yourself to be stared at. Breathe learn to enjoy his company and get lost in the moment only the two of you matter. If it helps at all i may bet a little catty but it may help if you give strangers a little something to really look at lol. This is of course after you guys have gone past the bff stage. Hopefully this helps.
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