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Catch-22: I can't be romantically involved with ANYONE?
I go to a small high school with mainly white people and indians, and I'm a black girl, but I feel like I can't date anyone because it would be a catch-22. I have no racial preferences, I'd just like to be with someone I can connect with, and am attracted to. but I feel like the only pairing I could be a part of at my school, without being scrutinized, is with another black guy, but I don't like any of the few other black guys at my school. I'm actually really attracted to a white guy, but idk if anything could even come from it, because even though I get the feeling he may like me, he may not try to pursue anything because of how others at school would react to it. it's a very small town in the south, and people are still racist and ignorant, even though they'd smile to your face. the type of place where an interracial relationship would be questioned and looked at strangely, like "how did those two ever get together!" I just wouldn't want to be scrutinized like that. that would freak me out. I wouldn't want people to question my pride in being black, or of my culture or whatever, cause it's just stupid. I know that race is irrelevant, but I can't change others' minds. And the guy I like and I have quite a bit in common, more than I have with most of the other black people at my school actually, so I don't see how different the "cultural differences" are, from being different races. I mean I'm not even from this town, I've lived in several countries, so I know to be accepting and how to relate to others and what not. I realize that people really aren't too different from each other, at the core. but i'm just really frustrated because I feel like I can't get into any relationship pretty much because of this. it makes me sad to see other couples, of the same race, just going about with each other and what not, cause a relationship feels so out of reach. why should I have to settle for some guy I don't like, just so I don't get scrutinized? hopefully it's better in college.. I just don't understand why high school has to be this way. it makes me want to just GTFO of the south, if it's like this everywhere. If someone asked me if I hated this town I'd smile and say no, but in my heart I truly despise it. I've never lived in a place this closed-minded before
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
First of all... don't let race get in the way of how you feel. And if you like the guy and he likes you and you guys want a relationship...GO FOR IT! You could spend your time worrying about how others perceive you or how you think you're suppose to be because that's how society labeled you... OR you could go after what you want and enjoy your life. Believe me, sweetie. Option #2 isn't as bad as it sounds ;D
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