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boyfriend in rehab
Okay so Ive asked you things on here like twice before in the last week. And I know its probably getting annoying dealing with me :/ But I really am like freaking out and your advice really helps me. So thank you so much!!
So I still havent heard from my "ex". Now its been a week and he graduates his program today and if he hasnt changed his mind I think hes heading to a halfway house today. But what I just don't understand is if I am gonna hear from him anytime soon or if he like changed his mind about me? There's so much going through my head and I've been going out at night so that I'm not killed with waiting for his phone calls. But every morning that I wake up and realize he still hasn't called makes me more anxious.
It all made sense when he said he couldn't be in a relationship right now and just wanted to start off slow with me. Build back the trust and show me the real him. But now it seems like maybe he's changed his mind and doesn't want me anymore? Like I keep thinking what I could have done wrong last conversation. but can't come to any faults. I was friendly, nice and didn't show him I was upset in any way.
I mean the thing is that I extremely care about this guy and love him a lot. I've been with him through almost everything. A lot of people have been saying that his addiction was just in love with me and I was his sunshine in all the dark. Or others say that theres no way we could have a relationship after all that has happened. I really dont want him to just chalk me up to his dark days and leave. But if thats what hes doing then im gonna let him. I just wish he didn't just leave without telling me. I feel like i deserve knowing...not just a lets be friends, ill call you after still and then nnothing. Please help! I really do love him and I really thought he did too. I just need a fresh perspective on this. And if you think he will call soon
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Ok, so firstly, I need to say that it's very difficult for me to give advice because I don't know your past history and whatnot. However from the latest update, it sounds like something has changed. A week is a long time not to call, even for friends. Especially as he is moving soon.
Can you call him? Or just send a text asking how he is? Don't go all clingy, just say hey, I haven't heard from you for a while, how's it going? Ask him how he feels about moving on to the halfway house etc. But don't ask him for a relationship status update!
Chances are it is nothing you did, however he may have been advised at rehab to cut off everything from his past life, to make a clean start. But he owes you a goodbye at least.
I still don't know if it IS goodbye, but you should find out. You do deserve to know, especially after he said all that about starting again and building the trust etc. However! If he still wants you in the friend zone, then putting pressure on him about a relationship is a bad idea. Just be friendly, ask him how he is, and try to gauge from his reaction what is going on in his head.
I'm sorry you are going through this; it's not nice. Sending happy thoughts your way!
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