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Me and My 'young love'.
I started dating this guy in august of 2011. He's a sweet guy but he's younger then Me. I'am 20 and he is 19. Not a big age difference but I get kind of scared that we wont last long because at times he not the "man' that i want him to be. I want us to be a mature couple and not fight all the time over silly things. He does so many things that annoy me and i want to be able to look over it all. I need advice on what to do and stratergies on how to make us stronger. What should I do?
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Girl, If he is not the "man" you wont then maybe moving on would be the right thing to do! Don't hold on to someone that doesn't make you happy!
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Girls mature faster then guys. While your boyfriend maybe 19 he probably very well thinks like someone who's 17. I read up somewhere that men tend to think a few years younger then their actual age until they hit the level of maturity. Some men grow out of it and others don't. If you want a more serious relationship then you could try talking to your boyfriend about taking on more responsibility as a couple. The way you can make your relationship stronger is by communicating and working together towards your goals. If you both don't have a job, Then try to go out and get one. Put in applications, Call places etc. Growing up is about taking on responsibility towards independence. If your boyfriend isn't willing to do these things then you know he is not on the same page as you. Sometimes it's about what is best for you, Not what you want. Try talking to him first about upping the responsibility and see how that goes but if he doesn't follow then you got some thinking to do.
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I don't think actual age is much of a factor here, I think it's more that girls tend to develop quicker than boys. It might explain why women seem to be attrated to older men and why some boys remain big kids all their lives, stuck in the same habitual character.
Your boy should mature soon, in several years time you might not recognise him as the same person, but its difficult to predict.
My husband of 30+ years is 10 years older than me, it took a long time to find the 'boy' in him and get him torelax and enjoy himself.
Try giving your guy responsibility for stuff, like holiday bookings or money for example, encouraging him to think seriously about things.
You may decide you can't take any more of his silliness, but it's probably a phase of growing up that you passed through some time ago. It's up to you whether you can accept this and wait for maturity to dawn.
Hope this helps, let me know how you get on?
Best wishes x.
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