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Insecurity - can't handle negative comments.


Question Posted Wednesday December 7 2011, 12:11 am

I am someone that gets a lot of attention. People constantly compliment my looks. And most of the time I feel like I feel good about my appearance. I'm a size 8, blonde, relatively tall.

But I can't handle negative comments, ever. I defended a friend of mine tonight, and this guy says my legs are like tree stumps or something random like that.

How is it that one tiny negative comment, the first I've had in forever, can undo so much positive reinforcement? Suddenly it feels like some kind of comfirmation that yes - it's all a lie. I'm average, I'm not attractive, I'm not skinny enough and I want to change everything about myself.

Most of the time I feel like I have good self esteem. But I used to have an eating disorder, I wonder if this stuff will always plague me. What gets me the most is, am I really this shallow? I care way too much about the fact that everyone views me as attractive, one person says a negative thing, mostly to get back at me, and I can think of nothing else.


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Lovatic4evz answered Thursday October 3 2013, 8:08 am:
You are not shallow at all. You're just vulnerable and at a stage where you just don't believe in yourself. You might think you have good self esteem, that you improved, but this feeling you're getting is just a reminder that you can never stop thinking about yourself.

This isn't being shallow, you just need some time to yourself, make yourself believe the truth... the truth that you are beautiful. That your legs that you seem so insecure about, is the most beautiful part of you. That everyone only tries to put you down because they are jealous.

The worst thing that is the worst about how you're feeling, is that you're thinking about who you could be. Never change, that's only going to make you feel more down, that's only going to make you feel that even you believe in what people say, and that's the worst thing.

Think about all the good things people say about you, think of me saying you're beautiful next time someone tries to put you down. Believe more in what you're thinking than what they're saying. Think that the only people and opinions that matter in you life, should be the people who makes you feel good about yourself, the people you love, and for one thing care about in return, otherwise there is no point in even having those people.

Remember me, remember your family, your friends, and just live in your beauty and never believe in the existence of ugliness, because no one else matters, only what you see matters, and what i see, is that you're beautiful. After all, only the best people get put down, think of it that way.

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