|
I did it with a married man. Does that make me an adultress?
I'm female. When I Was 20 years old I gave a married man a handjob. I also made out with him and got naked with him... I didnt give him oral but before he came I did bend over to swallow it so it wouldnt make a mess... I ended up not swallowing it because it tasted funny but still...
He fingered me, ate me out and placed his dick on my pussy, rubbing it and all that but he never put it in.
I would never normally do anything like this with someone who is married but he told me that his wife and him are more like best friends. Neither wanted marriage in their life but there was still a connection between them so they married anyway. She prefers sex with women over men so they have an open relationship where they are allowed to do such things.
Assuming he was telling the truth does this mean I committed adultry? I was not the one cheating, but I did know he was married and for all I know he was lying to me.
I am a mormon so if your mormon I would really like your advice, if your not I still want it and would apprecitae it greatly. I dont want my religion to be an indicator though if you dont actually know anything about the LDS religion. I just want general advice.
Please no negative comments. I know it was wrong but I want to know if I should consider myself an adultress becuase of it or if it was just simply sick and wrong.
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Depends on the definition.
The old laws against adultery labelled both the married and unmarried person as 'adulteress'. But those laws don't apply anymore, and most people only think of a 'adultery' as being something the married individual is committing.
I do not know exactly what the Mormon definition is - although most other Christian groups do consider both the married and unmarried individual as committing adultery. So if the religious definition is important to you, then yes, by that standard what you did was certainly the ‘sin’ of adultery.
However, I agree with Zane, you shouldn't feel the need to call yourself an adulteress - although maybe, if you are going to choose to be intimate with men in open relationships, you should re-evaluate whether your faith really reflects your beliefs and the way you want to live your life.
You did do something wrong, but the something wrong you did was not confirming with this man that he was in fact in an open relationship. The first thing any woman who hears that phrase should do (unless she walks away from him that second) is tell him she wants to speak to his wife and confirm that he is indeed, having an honest, open marriage.
Even if he was telling the truth, the old laws and most religions, would still define that as adultery. Because in the old laws and most religions, married is a defined by sexual monogamy. An ‘open marriage’ isn’t really marriage by most Christian standards.
So it was wrong if you acted against your beliefs.
And it was wrong not to confirm his statements.
But don’t worry so much about labelling yourself with an old-fashion, hard to pin down word. That’s not the important thing here now. The important thing now is how do you do better, and take better care of yourself in the future.
]
No I wouldn't consider yourself an adulteress
I know you stated you know you are wrong but I'm going to point something out about the sound of your post.
You knew he was married and by what he said to you was nothing but bullshit excuse. Yes, He is married and he should of never cheated on his wife. Whatever the circumstances might of been between him and his wife still doesn't change the fact that he is married. I think sometimes men tend to think inside their pants rather then with their heads......He was wrong, You were wrong. You've learned from your mistake but in the future don't believe everything you hear.
]
More Questions: |