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2 years and no loving.
My boyfriend and i have been together for 2 years and we love it. we have had multiple fights in the past but we have never broken up. we always make up. he and i have both never cheated either. the problem is that the 'spark' went away. i don't get butterflies when i kiss him, i just know that i love him and the kissing feels good. So i've talked to him tonight and told him i don't know if i am IN love with him like i used to be. i've never been in love before so i don't know what it truly feels like. i know that this feels different though. and then he told me the same. how would we know, and how do i let him know that he is in love with me ? or at least help him realize if he is or not. thank you
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
All relationships have expiration dates. Sometimes it's six weeks, other times its 60 years. It's all down to the intensity of the chemistry between the people involved.
You don't say how old you are, but since almost all of the people who pose questions here are in their teens or early 20's, I will say that at your age it is normal for you to grow apart or for your sensibilities to change since your brains will keep developing until about age 25. It happens. It's nobody's fault. Your current relationship, even if you decide to split, will be valuable because you will learn something from it and that will hopefully make your next relationship better. It's all part of growing up.
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Love is one of those things that never seems to make sense, and when it does it's a rarity and a complete surprise.
In love, when you know something, then you absolutely know it. If you know with every part of yourself that you love someone, then you love them. And if you know with every part of yourself that you don't love someone anymore, then you don't. When you don't know something, I think it's because it's not for certain yet.
I find that the butterflies only come for me in the beginning when it's exciting, new and flirty. As the relationship progresses, it can become kind of boring because things like kisses are something you get every day. It's not special or exciting anymore. But I think there is a different kind of feeling you get when you're in love with someone. It's kind of like butterflies but different. For me, it's this happy feeling. It kind of warms up inside of me and makes me smile. It's this feeling that makes me comfortable wherever I am and relaxes me. It's kind of a feeling that makes me feel special too, like I'm important and beautiful. Its a feeling that makes me know I'm in the right place, doing the right thing; a feeling that makes me know I'm meant to be with that person. But I don't know if everyone feels that way. It can be different for every person.
I don't think butterflies happen when you're in love, I think they happen when you have a crush on someone or you're just starting to love them. They're a combination of exhilaration, anticipation and nerves. When you fall in love with someone, you lose the nerves because you're comfortable around them.
I've had this before in a relationship where I had huge feelings for the person I was in that relationship with. We were best friends and fit together like two puzzle pieces. We started losing those in love feelings and eventually broke up. We stopped talking for a long time and I felt like I was a whole different person without him, a person that wasn't me. I tried to move on and felt like I was improving. We got back in contact and became really great friends again. I just had this epiphany one day and realised that even after two years, I was still just as in love with him as i was back then and suddenly everything made sense. I couldn't feel like I was myself without him in my life, I was not at all attracted to any other guy even though I tried to pretend I was, and since we'd met seven years ago I had been in love with him. It's funny how things work out.
I guess my terrible advice is that you don't really know until you know. You could wake up tomorrow and know that you're in love with him or that you're not in love with him. You could break up and realise that you really do love him or that you just weren't meant to be together any more. If you don't know how you feel, don't give up on your relationship just yet unless you think it's a good idea.
I honestly believe that if it's meant to be, it will. Maybe you two aren't in love right now because for whatever reason right now isn't the right time to be together, but in the future you'll get back together and it'll be a lot better for the both of you.
I'm sorry this is answer doesn't help you out much, but it's impossible for anyone to know if you are in love with your boyfriend or if he is still in love with you, that's something only the two of you can figure out.
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