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.therapy?
Why do you think I need therapy?? And it doesn’t work that way in my house. I can’t just tell my parents I need therapy and go, they won’t let me go unless I tell them. And I can’t imagine my parents reaction if they knew all this. It’s so embarrassing to tell them about all of this. It’s embarrassing to tell anyone this. I only told one of my friends, I didn’t want it to spread around school.
I guess I kind of do want to talk to somebody but I cannot. It’s a lot more complicated than you think. Can't I be normal without going to therapy?
I’ll remember what you said the next time I’m about to get upset at my family, and I need to go back to working out anyways. So maybe running will release a lot of this stress.
hahah and thanks for the guy advice, your good. And I enjoyed reading it.
annashae
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
It's that "hole in your life" issue. While I know you're trying to fill it with romance, I don't think the lack of romance is the cause of the hole in the first place.
When I was younger, a kid under the age of 12, I used to daydream about throwing myself in front of cars to save friends. It was win all around from my perspective. I didn't have to feel alone anymore, people would remember me as a good person, and the culmination of my life would be that I helped someone else. That was the most I thought of my self worth.
While I abandoned those kinds of fantasies the mindset behind it where I didn't feel like I was worth much unless I was making someone else happy continued to eat away at my mental well being. I became incapable of believing that anyone would want me around because at the time no one did. I couldn't see that I pushed everyone away from the start because I didn't think I was worth knowing. It affected every single part of who I was and how I interacted with the world in ways I am still trying to work out of myself to this day.
I need therapy. I can't afford it either. But there are issues in my life that remain unresolved, and there is a hole through me a mile wide that I feel like I need someone more knowledgeable than myself to address.
There's a hole through you, too. I think that if you could find a therapist you did feel comfortable with you won't be still fighting this eight years down the road like I am. Or if you are you'll have had an easier time and made more progress than me.
Can you be normal? Is anyone normal? I really doubt it. Can you be happy? It's entirely possible. You aren't me, and even I managed it some of the time. It's not something you won't get fixed without, but it's something that I think if you found your way to could help you work alot of your shit out quicker and easier than trying to figure it all out alone.
You aren't me, and it's just a suggestion. But it's one without a time limit. My wife is a year away from a job with insurance, when I'm insured I'm scheduling an appointment and going look for a decent professional to talk to to see if there's any helping me. Just keep an open mind. It's not an option now, then it's not an option now. Maybe in five years if you're still fucked up in the head it will be an option and you can consider it.
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